| |
| MY pipe is lit, my grog is mixed, | |
| My curtains drawn and all is snug; | |
| Old Puss is in her elbow-chair, | |
| And Tray is sitting on the rug. | |
| Last night I had a curious dream, | 5 |
| Miss Susan Bates was Mistress Mogg— | |
| What d’ ye think of that, my cat? | |
| What d’ ye think of that, my dog? | |
| |
| She looked so fair, she sang so well, | |
| I could but woo and she was won; | 10 |
| My self in blue, the bride in white, | |
| The ring was placed, the deed was done! | |
| Away we went in chaise-and-four, | |
| As fast as grinning boys could flog— | |
| What d’ ye think of that, my cat? | 15 |
| What d’ ye think of that, my dog? | |
| |
| What loving tête-à-têtes to come! | |
| But tête-à-têtes must still defer! | |
| When Susan came to live with me, | |
| Her mother came to live with her! | 20 |
| With Sister Belle she could n’t part, | |
| But all my ties had leave to jog— | |
| What d’ ye think of that, my cat? | |
| What d’ ye think of that, my dog? | |
| |
| The mother brought a pretty Poll— | 25 |
| A monkey too, what work he made! | |
| The sister introduced a beau— | |
| My Susan brought a favorite maid. | |
| She had a tabby of her own,— | |
| A snappish mongrel christened Gog— | 30 |
| What d’ ye think of that, my cat? | |
| What d’ ye think of that, my dog? | |
| |
| The monkey bit—the parrot screamed, | |
| All day the sister strummed and sung; | |
| The petted maid was such a scold! | 35 |
| My Susan learned to use her tongue; | |
| Her mother had such wretched health, | |
| She sate and croaked like any frog— | |
| What d’ ye think of that, my cat? | |
| What d’ ye think of that, my dog? | 40 |
| |
| No longer Deary, Duck, and Love, | |
| I soon came down to simple “M!” | |
| The very servants crossed my wish, | |
| My Susan let me down to them. | |
| The poker hardly seemed my own, | 45 |
| I might as well have been a log— | |
| What d’ ye think of that, my cat? | |
| What d’ ye think of that, my dog? | |
| |
| My clothes they were the queerest shape! | |
| Such coats and hats she never met! | 50 |
| My ways they were the oddest ways! | |
| My friends were such a vulgar set! | |
| Poor Tomkinson was snubbed and huffed, | |
| She could not bear that Mister Blogg— | |
| What d’ ye think of that, my cat? | 55 |
| What d’ ye think of that, my dog? | |
| |
| At times we had a spar, and then | |
| Mamma must mingle in the song— | |
| The sister took a sister’s part— | |
| The maid declared her master wrong— | 60 |
| The parrot learned to call me “Fool!” | |
| My life was like a London fog— | |
| What d’ ye think of that, my cat? | |
| What d’ ye think of that, my dog? | |
| |
| My Susan’s taste was superfine, | 65 |
| As proved by bills that had no end; | |
| I never had a decent coat— | |
| I never had a coin to spend! | |
| She forced me to resign my club, | |
| Lay down my pipe, retrench my grog— | 70 |
| What d’ ye think of that, my cat? | |
| What d’ ye think of that, my dog? | |
| |
| Each Sunday night we gave a rout | |
| To fops and flirts, a pretty list; | |
| And when I tried to steal away, | 75 |
| I found my study full of whist! | |
| Then, first to come, and last to go, | |
| There always was a Captain Hogg— | |
| What d’ ye think of that, my cat? | |
| What d’ ye think of that, my dog? | 80 |
| |
| Now was not that an awful dream | |
| For one who single is and snug— | |
| With Pussy in the elbow-chair, | |
| And Tray reposing on the rug? | |
| If I must totter down the hill, | 85 |
| ’T is safest done without a clog— | |
| What d’ ye think of that, my cat? | |
| What d’ ye think of that, my dog? | |
| |
