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(Composite Columns)
THE GENERAL ’eard the firin’ on the flank, | |
| An’ ’e sent a mounted man to bring ’im back | |
| The silly, pushin’ person’s name an’ rank | |
| ’Oo’d dared to answer Brother Boer’s attack: | |
| For there might ’ave been a serious engagement, | 5 |
| An’ ’e might ’ave wasted ’alf a dozen men; | |
| So ’e ordered ’im to stop ’is operations round the kopjes, | |
| An’ ’e told ’im off before the Staff at ten! | |
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| And it all goes into the laundry, | |
| But it never comes out in the wash, | 10 |
| ’Ow we’re sugared about by the old men | |
| (’Eavy-sterned amateur old men!) | |
| That ’amper an’ ’inder an’ scold men | |
| For fear o’ Stellenbosh! | |
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| The General ’ad “produced a great effect,” | 15 |
| The General ’ad the country cleared—almost; | |
| The General “’ad no reason to expect,” | |
| And the Boers ’ad us bloomin’ well on toast! | |
| For we might ’ave crossed the drift before the twilight, | |
| Instead o’ sitting down an’ takin’ root; | 20 |
| But we was not allowed, so the Boojers scooped the crowd, | |
| To the last survivin’ bandolier an’ boot. | |
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| The General saw the farm’ouse in ’is rear, | |
| With its stoep so nicely shaded from the sun; | |
| Sez ’e, “I’ll pitch my tabernacle ’ere,” | 25 |
| An’ ’e kept us muckin’ round till ’e ’ad done. | |
| For ’e might ’ave caught the confluent pneumonia | |
| From sleepin’ in his gaiters in the dew; | |
| So ’e took a book an’ dozed while the other columns closed | |
| And De Wet’s commando out an’ trickled through! | 30 |
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| The General saw the mountain-range ahead, | |
| With their ’elios showin’ saucy on the ’eight, | |
| So ’e ’eld us to the level ground instead, | |
| An’ telegraphed the Boojers would n’t fight. | |
| For ’e might ’ave gone an’ sprayed ’em with a pompom, | 35 |
| Or ’e might ’ave slung a squadron out to see— | |
| But ’e was n’t takin’ chances in them ’igh an’ ’ostile kranzes— | |
| He was markin’ time to earn a K. C. B. | |
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| The General got ’is decorations thick | |
| (The men that backed ’is lies could not complain), | 40 |
| The Staff ’ad D. S. O.’s till we was sick, | |
| An’ the soldier—’ad the work to do again! | |
| For ’e might ’ave known the District was an ’otbed, | |
| Instead of ’andin’ over, upside-down, | |
| To a man ’oo ’ad to fight ’alf a year to put it right, | 45 |
| While the General went an’ slandered ’im in town! | |
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| An’ it all went into the laundry, | |
| But it never came out in the wash. | |
| We were sugared about by the old men | |
| (Panicky, perishin’ old men) | 50 |
| That ’amper an’ ’inder an’ scold men | |
| For fear o’ Stellenbosh! | |
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