Cyr. Ah, no, young man, that is hot enough! You might have saiddear me, there are a thousand thingsvarying the tone. For instance, here you areAggressive: I sir, if I had such a nose, nothing would serve but I must cut it off! Amicable: It must be in your way while drinking; you ought to have a special beaker made! Descriptive: It is a craga peaka promontory! A promontory, did I say? It is a peninsula! Inquisitive: What may the office be of that oblong receptacle? Is it an inkhorn or a scissor-case? Mincing: Do you so dote on birds, that you have, fond as a father, been at pains to fit the little darlings with a roost? Blunt: Tell me, sir, you, when you smoke, is it possible you blow the vapor through your nose without a neighbor crying, The chimney is afire? Anxious: Go with caution, I beseech, lest your head, dragged over by that weight, should drag you over! Tender: Have a little sunshade made for it! It might get freckled! Learned: None but the beast, sir, mentioned by Aristophanes, the hippocampelephantocamelos, can have borne beneath his forehead so much cartilage and bone! Offhand: What, comrade, is that sort of peg in style? Capital to hang ones hat upon! Emphatic: No wind can hope, oh, lordly nose, to give the whole of you a cold, but the norwester! Dramatic: It is the Red Sea when it bleeds! Admiring: What a sign for a perfumers shop! Lyrical: Art thou a Triton, and is that thy conch? Simple: A monument! When is admission free? Deferential: Suffer, sir, that I should pay you my respects; that is what I call possessing a house of your own! Rustic: Hi, boys! Call that a nose? Ye dont gull me! Its either a prize carrot or else a stunted gourd! Military: Level against the cavalry! Practical: Will you put it up for raffle? Indubitably, sir, it will be the feature of the game! And finally, in parody of weeping Pyramus: Behold, behold the nose that traitorously destroyed the beauty of its master, and is blushing for the same! That, my dear sir, or something not unlike, is what you would have said to me had you the smallest leaven of letters or of wit; but of wit, oh, most pitiable of objects made by God, you never had a rudiment; and of letters you have just those that are needed to spell fool!