| The American Heritage® Book of English Usage. |
A Practical and Authoritative Guide to Contemporary English. 1996.
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5. Gender: Sexist Language and Assumptions
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| § 3. domestic partner |
| Many people would now agree that the concept of family can include persons living together who may not be married or who may not be of opposite sexes. Few can agree, however, on how to refer to such persons. Many new words have been tried out in the 1980s and 1990s, but most of these have been dropped from general usage. Thus the linguistic situation seems to reflect the continuing flux of the social situation. | 1 |
| One term, significant other, which has been in use since at least 1985, is an all-purpose word for describing a lover, whether gay or straight, or a spouse, but this term is now considered somewhat outdated. Spousal equivalent or spouse-equivalent, dating from about 1990, is not widely used and in fact may be considered offensive in that it implies that legal marriage between heterosexual partners is the standard to which everything else is to be compared. | 2 |
Another term, one originally used as a U.S. Census Bureau designation, is POSSLQ (person of the opposite sex sharing living quarters), pronounced (p s’ l-ky ). This term is problematic in that it is unwieldy and limits the liaison to one of opposite-sex partners. On the other hand, it is vague enough to include roommates who are not romantically involved. | 3 |
| A term that is gaining in popularity and is being used by some companies and organizations in drafting benefits plans that include all members of such nontraditional families is domestic partner, which has also been in use since about 1985. A newer term that is also gaining in use is life partner. And there are other terms that have a long history of usage, such as companion, lifelong (or longtime) companion, and partner. Some people consider these terms euphemistic when applied to gays and lesbians. These terms can also be misleading, even in general application, and you should probably not use them for this reason. | 4 |
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| The American Heritage® Book of English Usage. Copyright © 1996 by Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved. |
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