Verse > Anthologies > T. R. Smith, ed. > Poetica Erotica: A Collection of Rare and Curious Amatory Verse
T. R. Smith, comp.  Poetica Erotica: Rare and Curious Amatory Verse.  1921–22.
The Maid’s Complaint
Bagford Ballads
(Anonymous, 1680; from Pt. III)

YOUNG men give ear to me awhile,
If you to merriment are inclined,
And I’ll tell you a story shall make you smile,
Of late done by a woman kind;
And as she went musing all alone,        5
I heard her to sigh, to sob and make moan,
For a dill done, dill done, dill done done,
Quoth she, I’m undone it I haven’t a dill done.
For I am a maid and a very good maid,
And sixteen years of age am I,        10
And fain would I part with my Maidenhead,
If any good fellow would with me lie;
But none to me ever proffered such love
As to lie by my side and give me a shove
With his dill done, etc.        15
O happy were I, etc.
At night when I do go to bed
Thinking for to take my rest,
Strange fancies come into my head,
I pray for that which I love best:        20
For it is a comfort, and pleasure doth bring
To women that hath such a pretty fine thing,
Called a will done, etc.
Then happy were I, etc.
Last week I walked in the Strand,        25
I met with my sister, a handsome lass,
I kindly took her by the hand,
This question of her I did ask:
Whether she kept still a maiden alone,
Or whether her maidenhead was fled or gone,        30
For a dill done, etc.
O happy were I, etc.
Kind sister, quoth she, to tell you the truth,
It has gone this twelve months day;
I freely gave it to a handsome youth,        35
That used with me to sport and play:
To grieve for the loss of it I never shall,
If I had ten thousand I could give ’em all
For a dill done, etc.
O happy were I, etc.        40
She making this answer, I bid her adieu,
And told her I could no longer stay,
I let go her hand, and I straight left the Strand,
And to Covent-Garden I hasted away:
Where lively young gallants do use to resort,        45
To pick up young lasses and show ’em fine sport
With his dill done, etc.
Oh, happy were I, etc.
I would I’d a sweet heart, as some maids have
That little know how to pleasure a man,        50
I’d keep him frolicsome, gallant and brave,
And make as much on him as any one can:
Before any good thing he should lack
I’d sell all my coats, and smock from my back
For his dill done, etc.        55
Then happy were I, etc.
Thus young men I have declared in brief
The cause of my sorrow and woe,
And if any of you will yield me relief
Speak cheerfully to me, say yea or no:        60
I live at the Sign of the Cup and the Can,
And will be loving to any young man
For his dill done, etc.
And all my, etc.
Besides, young men, I have store of money,        65
Good red gold and silver bright,
And he shall be master of every penny,
That marries with me and yields me delight.
For why t’other night I heard my dame Nancy
Declare how her master did tickle her fancy        70
With his dill done, etc.
Then come to me, my bonny lad
While I am in my prime, I pray
And take a good bargain while it is to be had,
And do not linger your time away.        75
’Tis money, you see, makes many a man rich:
Then come along, rut on the place that doth itch
For a dill done, dill done, dill done done,
Take all my money, and give me a dill done.

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