book club reflection 4

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BOOK CLUB REFLECTION 4 1 Parenting Without Borders Reflection 4 Mackenzie L. Puentez University of North Texas HDFS 2033 Professor Birlew November 17, 2022
BOOK CLUB REFLECTION 4 2 Parenting Without Borders Reflection 4 Chapter 9 Chapter 9 is all about the importance of kindness. Children should always be taught to be kind to others, but that looks different in different cultures. Here in America, “most parents today hear conflicting and confusing messages about how to teach kindness” and since there are already different parenting styles we know that children are raised differently.This goes along with what the textbook says about establishing trajectories, and how “parents are the ones who usually set the child's feet on a path”. Just like how in different cultures children are raised differently, when establishing trajectories ``parents are likely influenced by culture, socioeconomic status, goals values, resources, and their own parenting history. When teaching children kindness the book explains that we have to be careful because oftentimes kindness can “slide beyond casually friendly into thoughtlessness.. We are teaching them to feel self important and entitled”. Another point in the book is that babies are born kind, and they are born with their own theories. So, it is a parents responsibility to lead by example because “these ideas can be changed for the better, or they can be changed for worse” as babies are learning and applying their new knowledge to their idea of how the world works. I understand this because my little brother often mimics behavior. An example of this is how he does not like to share but if he sees my mom and I sharing he decides that he wants to be included and share as well. So, we have to be careful with how we act because we know he is always watching and learning through us.
BOOK CLUB REFLECTION 4 3 Chapter 10 Chapter 10 discusses responsibility and trying to avoid the “helplessness trap” that children often pull their parents into. This chapter goes on to talk about how parents find themselves in situations where they are doing things for their children that their children are more than capable of doing themselves, yet they choose to be lazy and make their parents feel they need to do it for them. I see this often with my younger brother, he is fourteen and should be able to make his own lunch for school and do his own laundry like I did at his age. But, instead he tells my mom he cant and that he needs her to do it. This trend of “helpless” children is remarkably high in America. “In America today it is less common for children to be as responsible as they were in the past. The fact that we have so many “time-saving-devices like the laundry machine, dishwasher and vacuum cleaners” also makes it to where there is less for children to contribute to. The book discusses how setting clear expectations from an early age can help eliminate this problem. In Japan children are expected to be responsible for themselves, even at a young age. This is because they have clear expectations of what they should be doing to help out that are enforced by everyone around them. This goes along with the section in the textbook about providing structure and how “structure for young children is important, as it provides them with a sense of stability, predictability, and security”. And, setting up this structure can include discipling and making sure that a child knows what is expected from them.
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