A Mother's Day Kiss-Off By Leslie Bennetts

There is a huge debate going on today about gender. Society believes you’re a boy if you like blue, and like to play sports and go hunting; and you’re a girl if you like pink and have long hair and pig tails and play with Barbie dolls. Society has forced us to choose between the two. I believe that both women and men can both have it all. As Dorment says, ‘competing work life balance and home as much as women’. (Dorment 697) I believe in this article Richard Dorment, has argued his opinion very well, I think both men and woman equally need to be involved in housework as well as taking care of the children. In today’s world were judging who were going to be even before were born. Throughout this article Dorment effectively convinces his audience that men and women should be equal by using statistics and emotional stories, Dorment uses personal stories and extensive research to make readers believe in his credibility, and lastly Dorment employs the rhetorical appeals of pathos and ethos effectively.

“The Myth of Co-Parenting; How it Was Supposed to Be. How it Was” by Hope Edelman and “My problem with Her Anger” by Eric Bartels both explain the strain child rearing and lack of communication can put upon a marriage. The two articles describe their personal experiences with this issue, but the authors have differing points of view on the subject. Although they have different perspectives, both Edelman and Bartels explore ideas of traditional gender roles and unrealistic expectations in relationships.

In the articles “My Problem with Her Anger” and The Myth of Co-Parenting: How It Was Supposed to Be. How It Was,” authors Eric Bartels, feature writer for the Portland Tribune in Portland, Oregon, and Hope Edelman, nonfictional writer whose work has appeared in the New York Times, Chicago Tribune, and Seventeen magazine, discuss the roles they play within their family and what the other partner is lacking. They express their discontent regarding their wives and the activities they perform domestically. Wives have an image of what they want their family to be like, but according to the

The stereotyping of women is quite common in today 's society and throughout history. In the past, women have taken the full time job of being a mother and a housewife. The 1930s initially started the ideal image of a woman. A woman was often represented as a maid-like being who would serve to their husband and children. In Richard Alleyne’s article, “Advice for women in the 1930s: Nothing Destroys the Happiness of Married Life More than the Lazy, Slovenly Wife,” he discusses the frequent expectations of a housewife. Common assumptions included; “Don’t argue with your husband; do whatever he tells you and obey all his orders” (1) and “Nothing destroys the happiness of married life more than the lazy, slovenly wife” (1). These rules have often been published into past newspapers that were

In this satirical article, Brady expresses the difference between the roles of women and men in the 1970’s by stating men’s point of view on women and women’s roles in society. Throughout her article, Brady emphasizes the roles of women. For example, women could now “work and...takes care of the children when they are sick”. Comparing the 1880’s to the 1970’s, there has been a big improvement. Many women had jobs outside their home, but still were responsible for most housework and childcare while their husband’s only responsibility in a marriage was to go to work and earn money to support the family. Society’s expectations allowed women to work outside the home to support college education for husbands; however,women had to know how to balance their time between their children and their jobs, making sure that their husbands “cannot miss classes at school.” During the 1970’s, women were still oppressed in many ways and had to follow society's expectations in order to live up to the men’s view of women’s roles in society. Even though society’s expectations of women had improved since The Awakening, most of women’s roles had stayed the same. In the article, Brady specifies how once a husband is “through with school and has a job, [he expects the] wife to quit working and remain at home so that [she] can more fully and completely take

While both authors stand on the idea of marriage changing in roles, Hope Edelman in “ The Myth of Co-Parenting: How It Was Supposed to Be. How It Was,” inserts her view about marriage in her own experience that shows her attitude on marriage mainly through her husband leaving all the responsibility toward her. When parents are not there for their kids, often times kids feel unattached with their parents creating a weaker bond. Edelman’s frustration came from having a dream of marrying happily to having it demolished.

In her article “The Myth of Co-Parenting: How It Was Supposed to Be. How It Was”, author Hope Edelman claims that perhaps the ideal, balanced, and harmonious marriage that many couples yearn for is merely an unachievable myth. Edelman’s anger and frustration drives her essay as she recounts her childhood, analyzes societal gender roles, and narrates her own relationship in order to explore the concept of shared responsibility in a marriage.

In “The End of Men?,” an article featured in The Atlantic in summer 2010, author Hanna Rosin illustrates the drastic, ascending shifts perceived in modern society. Rosin poises the theory of how men were traditionally seen as the superior gender. The author believes there is a contractionary shift in gender roles and that the new era is “[B]etter suited to women” (Rosin 304). Recent studies show that women are becoming prominent in the workforce, education, and family. Accordingly, she explains how women are miraculously able to balance work while nurturing their children. Rosin believes that this occurs because men are not biologically made to tend children. Additionally, Rosin analyses how men lost “8 million jobs” during the Great Recession (Rosin 306). During that time, women were becoming what made a majority of the workforce. There were increases in women’s presence in what used to be male-dominated fields: school, politics, and business. Rosin questions this drastic shift concerning women and men’s roles in society, stating how they are now equally competing for jobs. Moreover, the way women behave now show their commendable abilities in the workforce and how society is changing as they establish their dominance and authority everyday. Once, women were frowned upon, but nowadays, more people favor having girls than boys. Today’s era is commending women with their admirable work ethic and self-worth. Throughout most of history, men dominated the

Stephanie Coontz started off her article about the 50th anniversary of the publication of Betty Friedan’s international best seller, “The Feminine Mystique”, which was written about the women’s movement of the 1960s. What Coontz is trying to explain is that gender equality is not stalled, but “It has hit a wall”. Her title is the opposite of what she is trying to write about in the article. At first she talked about women’s rights back when the book was written. Instead of blaming the beliefs of gender roles from individuals, she points the finger at the economy and the work-family policies as the major problems to gender equality. She explains the gender equality stalled during 1990s and the first few years of the 2000s. She brought into text the usual statics, “the percentage of Americans preferring the male breadwinner/female homemaker family model actually rose to 40 percent from 34 percent. Between 1997 and 2007, the number of full-time working mothers who said they would prefer to work part time increased to 60 percent from 48 percent. In 1997, a quarter of stay-at-home mothers said full-time work would be ideal. By 2007, only 16 percent of stay-at-home mothers wanted to work full time.”(Coontz) She also talked about how 70 percent of men and women want an egalitarian relationship and how the demand of work has intensified.

The modern day woman works outside of the home, but then returns and continues to take care of housework and the children. Sociologists refer to this part of the woman’s day as the, “Second shift.” Two studies conducted found that if a man is more economically dependent on his wife, he is less likely to do housework. However, no evidence suggests that becoming economically independent makes marriage any less desirable for a woman. The family is the initial agent of socialization in their child’s life, however, even though the mother of the family may have the job with longer hours and better pay, the parents will still reinforce traditional gender roles in their household (Thompson 301-302.) This behavior can cause a child to embrace the stereotype that the woman’s only role is to cook, clean, and take care of the children. Even if a woman is the primary

Whether it is the past or the present, there have always been gender roles in society. In most homes, it is the woman’s responsibility to take care of the house. This includes cleaning, meal preparations, raising and taking care of the children as well as the husband. Compared to the men who take care of the more physical activities, such as yard work. It was known throughout many years that it was a woman’s responsibility to stay in the house while the man would go out and look for work to provide money for his family. Although the intensity of gender roles has changed, it still exists.

“Wash the color clothes on Tuesday and put them on the clothesline to dry” (Kincaid). A little girl is being told that she needs to do the jobs around the house now and when she’s older so her house is in tip-top shape. “Gender stereotypes begin the second a baby’s gender if found out.” (Brewer). They are taught at a young age to do work around the house to help the mother, to tend to their husbands and to be a homemaker (PBS). “Women are supposed to cook and do housework. Women are responsible for raising children” (Brewer). That is what

Robert Dorment’s summary from his article talked about that women always complained about men did wrong but men who worked so hard for their family and work-life balance. Richard used that word “castigate” for men that means women scold men, but they did not realize men worked so hard. Other quote about the castigation of men, “…person whose husband, by her own admission, sacrificed much in his own academic career to do other heavy lifting with their children, all so she could pursue her dream job and then complain about it, bitterly, in the pages of a national magazine” (Dorment 708). Anne-Marie Slaughter explained that women who get promotion from other positions that they realized they do not have spent time with their family and some women who leave their jobs because of their family reasons. The quote said, “It is unthinkable that an official would actually step down to spend time with his or her family that this must be a cover for something else” (Slaughter 682). Third article called Women, work and work/life balance: Research roundup talked about the wage inequality and unequal responsibilities between men and women. Women have more family responsibilities than men do because some women are staying at home while taking care of their kids. Last article, Work-Life Balance – An integrated Approach: The case for joint and several responsibility talked about the

The generation now has made it easier to equalize men and women but there is still a substantial amount of places where gender inequality is still happening in the workplace and where females still face discrimination. Women are often discriminated in the workplace and are usually not promoted as quickly as men are and they also receive less pay. History shows that women have not always been defined as property and thought of as second class citizens. But in the 21st century many have seen a drastic change in the so called “traditional” family ways where women are suppose to stay home and take care of the household chores, food, and children and men are suppose to work to support their family and provide financial stability. Many assume that in the workplace women are more vulnerable and less competent than men because women 's instincts are to put their family before work or anything else. Whereas men are the ones who will usually stay the late hours to work. People on both sides of the political spectrum and everywhere in between seem to be fearful of what is to come and more fearful of others than they are often willing to admit.

Not only are woman subjected to society norms based on their personality characteristics, but also on their life choices and “domestic responsibilities” questions arise for woman like “who will care for you children and husband”. Montague Kern and Paige P. Edley state that women will continue to be “criticized for abandoning their traditional family roles” (1). This topic is not something that is brought up to their male counterparts. I don’t believe I have ever heard a man be questioned on who was going to assume the responsibility of raising their children. So until society genuinely accepts that raising children and other domestic issues are shared endeavors, then women will continue to face this barrier. (Robson, 208)