Analysis Of Deborah Tannen'sBut What Do You Mean?

Deborah Tannen and William Lutz both discuss the difficulty of communicating. Their point of views may be different, but their conclusion is the same. Men and women have difficulties of communicating. Not because the two genders want to be complicated but simply because we don’t realize how or what we’re doing when it’s happening.

In History Lesson, Natasha Trethewey uses a photograph to relive her past. She uses imagery to give a visual description of the photograph. Trethewey also uses simile to compare minnows to switchblades, “Minnows dart at my feet / glinting like switchblades” (7-8). Furthermore, Trethewey isolates her grandmother and herself from the others, “It is 1970, two years after they opened/ the rest of this beach to us”(11-12). Perhaps, because Trethewey is a mixed-race she and her grandmother and were not allowed on the beach.

In the video lecture presented by Deborah Tannen, He Said, She Said, Tannen emphasizes that men and women grow up in very different social worlds. When boys grow up, they learn that there is often going to be an inequality of force in any conversation. For girls, however, they feel that equality is very important and that it needs to be enforced through sympathy-based bonding. As adults, these different messages behind socialization can often lead to confusion, miscommunication, and, sometimes, hurt feelings. Tannen explores the difficulties of cross-gender communication and how we can overcome them by understanding where these conversational rituals come from. As a reflection on Tannen’s lecture, this paper will analyze how the different developments of boys and girls lead to the different views men and women have on the world. First of all, childhood and friendship is perceived differently by each gender.

There are times when you will argue with your partner. It is important to learn to apologize for your wrong doings in the relationship. Be sincere and genuine when you’re saying sorry. It is important to maintain your individuality in the relationship. If your spouse or partner says something to hurt your feelings, be open and talk it out. If you need more help with communication in your marriage you can seek counseling. It can be beneficial.

In “Sex, Lies and Conversation” Deborah Tannen argues that the problems of men and women in marriage are caused by a misunderstanding rather than lack of communication. Throughout the passage she discusses theses misunderstandings and reveals the solution to the problem.

In Deborah Tannen’s article “There is No Unmarked Woman” she focuses on how women are being misconceived and prejudged on solely the way they’re dressed. The main point in the article is that there is no such thing as an unmarked woman – men have the option and women simply do not. To be “marked” in the way Tannen states it is changing the meaning of a word by simply adding a participle, but that participle has no meaning on its own. Deborah Tannen points out that even in the English language marked is a staple of linguistic theory. By simply adding a linguistic participle to a word that already has no meaning by itself can change the meaning of a word. As Tannen states in her article that women must make a decision on how they wish to appear on a day-to-day basis through their makeup, hair style, shoes, clothes, etc. When women are choosing how to appear everyday they’re trying to escape the preconceptions that men never really have to face due to more narrow decisions. Tannen makes a good statement when she refers to the research of Ralph Fasold in which men are actually marked. “Fasold points out that girls are born with fully female bodies, while boys are born with modified female bodies.” Tannen writes. In conclusion Tannen says how she’s upset the

In Lofton’s book, she addresses that there is more to Oprah than meets the eye. Her thesis statement, “What is Oprah? Oprah is an instance of American astonishment at what can be” (Lofton 1), shows the reader that the author clearly sees Oprah as a significant figure in America and will proceed to show us how so throughout the book. Through several examples, Lofton conveys her point by pointing out the influence Oprah has had on others to help them live life to their full potentials religiously, economically, physically, emotionally and socially.

Martha Irvine, a graduate of the University of Michigan published an article titled Queer Evolution which talked about how the word “Queer” itself has evolved into the mainstream. Originally the word’s definition was to describe something as odd or weird. Society utilized the word “Queer” as an insult to the LGBTQ community. As more sexual orientations are being discovered, “Queer” became a more accepted word in the gay community in order to make things simpler. Irvine’s essay showed that whatever word we use, can affect a person depending on the intention, and the tone of how it’s being said. Irvine’s essay is very similar to Deborah Tannen’s essay You’re Wearing That which talks about the relationship between mother and daughter and how words have established expectations for women based on their appearance and behavior. Another essay that well connects with Tannen and Irvine’s articles is a section from a book written by Michael Kimmel titled Bros Before Hos’’: The Guy Code. Kimmel talks about “The Guy Code”, rules that a man should always follow in order to be considered a real man. Words are the reason why these standards have been established for all genders and sexualities. The relationships between parents and children would be better if words were replaced, which would abolish the expectations that society has for men and women.

In the article, "For Argument’s Sake: Why Do We Feel Compelled to Fight About Everything? Witten by Deborah Tannen. She express that we live in an argumentative culture, where everyone is entitled to their own freedom of speech and rights. Tannen shows that arguments rarely lead to an understanding, but rather that an argument becomes less about the topic at hand and more about proving the opposing side wrong ( Tannen, Deborah(,2008). She tells her stories in many different form to gather the audience’s attention. She then starts to use big words and different logics to appeal to a more intellectual audience. She then starts her stories by manipulating and persuading the unintelligent audience to pull them in so they would know that she is insulting them by using the bigger words, making them feel intimidated.

Deborah Sampson Gannet is known for her courage, devotion and her female heroism. Her theme of her story is she is constantly being separated from her family and getting hurt in the Revolutionary War. Deborah Sampson disguised herself as a man to fight in the Revolutionary War. Deborah Sampson was born on December 17, 1760 in Plympton, Massachusetts.

Deborah Lacks is introduced by Skloot using an illustrating a description of Deborah's adolescence. Deborah is faced with many challenges in her life like not knowing who her mother really was. On page 206, chapter 25 the text says “And Deborah started handing out newsletters about her mother and the cells, saying, “I just want y'all read what's on this paper! And tell everybody! Bring it around . We want everybody in the world to know about my mother.” This shows how much Deborah cared to know about her mother and her cells. Even though her family didn't have much interest in them, Deborah took matters into her own hands and collected information to find out more about her mother.

Returned call to Ms Deborah Turner. She wanted to complain about a CW worker that did not allowed see her great-niece Astasia (2years old) and great-nephew, Odion (4 years old).

Conversation is a ritual every person must encounter throughout their lives in order to function properly with one another in today’s society. However, every individual has a “different idea about what’s appropriate” when approaching someone in any sort of conversation; that is why we are referred to as individuals (Tannen 327). There are thousands of diverse languages to speak to one another with, in fact that means there are thousands of different ways to offend each other with our words. Within those languages there are several contrasting gestures that can offend any single person, such as the amount of times individuals apologize in one meeting, giving criticism too harshly, or thanking someone so often it does not seem genuine. In the article “What Do You Mean,” Deborah Tannen touches upon apologies, criticism, and thank yous in further detail to explain where individuals go wrong within conversation and how they can fix their actions. Individuals find it satisfying to please others by being polite because it is the ‘right’ thing to do, however like myself others need to stand up for themselves and get directly to the point now in order to avoid conflict later in life.

Deborah Tannen is the author of Sex, Lies and Conversation: Why is it So Hard for Men and Women to Talk to Each Other. Deborah Tannen is a woman who researches the relationships between men and women. She has not only conducted research but also has information to support her view. In her essay Deborah Tannen argues complications happen in marriages/relationships due to individuals not being able to communicate with each other properly.

If not for Trisha Brown the current modern genre would be very different from how it is today. Trisha Brown was essentially a revolutionary modern choreographer. Trisha Brown’s movements were finding the extraordinary in everyday life. They began challenging the existing perceptions of what is considered performance. Trisha Brown’s style as well as the concepts that it produced were severely influential to modern dance then, as well as now.