Analysis Of Irvin Yalom 's The Gift Of Therapy

Painful as it may be, such experiences brings home the finality of death. Something deep within us demands a confrontation with death. A last look assures us that the person we loved is, indeed, gone forever.” (108) Cable finishes his essay by asking, Tim if his job ever depressed him. Tim in reply says, “No it doesn’t, and I do what I can for people and take satisfaction in enabling relatives to see their loved ones as they were in real life.” (108) After reading this essay I feel as though sometimes we don’t understand death so therefore we do not talk much about it. By reading about what goes on after your loved one dies and is sent to these places to be prepared and ready for burial, it helps to understand why morticians and funeral directors do what they do. Knowing that someone enjoys taking the responsibility in providing that comfort in a sorrowful time makes me appreciate these people in these occupations a bit

Bowen,D.E, & Strickler,S. L. (2004). A good friend for bad times: helping others through grief. Minneapolis, MN: Augsburg Fortess

To begin, there are many aspects of helping patients that are dealing with grief, loss, death, or dying. Whether the patient has lost someone that was close to them or they themselves are dying, the situation is quite fragile. Some important aspects that may help when handling these patients are knowledge about the different cultures and their beliefs and traditions, different factors that have an impact on grief, and how to communicate with people living on the edge of life. These are all extremely important matters when it comes to such a sensitive situation.

When it comes to death the typical person is not that knowledgeable about or understanding of death. People are very scared when the topic of death arises. We all want to live forever with no fear of having to explore the aspect of us dying and having to plan a funeral or their own funeral. Death is never an openly discussed topic. With death and dealing with it we are lucky to have the book Final Gifts by Callanan and Kelley. They have provided a ton of information to help us to grow strong and at ease with the area of death. I will tell my feelings on the book and how it has impacted me.

On May 11th 2013, my grandma passed away due to pancreatic cancer. A little later that year on September 25th, my mom received a call from my aunt in Guam that my dad had passed away in his sleep. Then on May 14th 2014, my grandpa passed from complications of an allergic reaction to a medication. So within a year, I was left to deal with three immediate family deaths, one right after another. Losing such important figures in one’s life could leave someone depressed and unmotivated to move on with their own life and to rise above those challenges is difficult, yet possible. During this time of hardship, I grew discouraged and saddened, but over time I became motivated to set aside these struggles and make a change.

Even though death is inevitable, it is quite clear that people can devise methods under which they can cope with the loss of their loved ones; for instance, their immediate relatives if not friends. Drawing practical guidelines from this book, one can constructively come up with communication strategies that may have encouragement to those who have lost their loved ones. This initiative encourages

Communication Edwidge Danticat’s remarkable book, Brother, I’m Dying, engages the audience on a sensational journey on experiencing death in its most sporadic state, but like a Phoenix, life is restored through the next generation of their family. Danticat deals with her communication barriers through understanding her father’s undertones, translating for her uncle, and writing for herself. These coping methods make her writing style unique, but more importantly credible. Edwidge spent the majority of her youth deciphering her father’s emotions out of the letters he sent. His living in America and the children in Haiti created and uneasy and limited communication between them.

The Cokesbury United Methodist Church grief support group follows a thirteen-week curriculum from GriefShare, however, new members can join in at any time as each week has a “self-contained” lesson. The topic for the week I attendee focused on the “why” of losing a loved one. Through following this curriculum, the group seeks to equip members with “essentials to recover from the hurt of grief and loss.” (GriefShare, n.d.) The group focuses on helping members rebuild their lives after they experience tremendous loss and grief through facing the challenge together. (GriefShare, n.d.)

“There is no greater gift you can give someone in grief than to ask them about their loved one and then really listen!” I read this quote once when I was small from the diary of quotable quotes collected by my grandfather. At that time, I was too young to understand what the words ‘really listen’ meant. But now in this process of training to become a counsellor, I am experiencing what it means to ‘really listen’ and how powerful it is!

To fully understand the causes and particularly the effects that bereavement can have on someone’s life, especially if you have been fortunate to not have been touched with the experience, will help with understanding what someone is going through and how it can alter their behavior. The intensity in which someone experiences their loss of a person is dependent on the closeness of the relationship and the suddenness of the passing, even religion amongst many other factors. “The way a person

“Ordinary people” everywhere are faced day after day with the ever so common tragedy of losing a loved one. As we all know death is inevitable. We live with this harsh reality in the back of our mind’s eye. Only when we are shoved in the depths of despair can we truly understand the multitude of emotions brought forth. Although people may try to be empathetic, no one can truly grasp the rawness felt inside of a shattered heart until death has knocked at their door. We live in an environment where death is invisible and denied, yet we have become desensitized to it. These inconsistencies appear in the extent to which families are personally affected by death—whether they

Irvin Yalom (2012) initiates thought-provoking moment after thought-provoking moment in his work, “The Gift of Therapy: An Open Letter to a New Generation of Therapists and Their Patients.” There is an authentic yet profound air in Yalom’s work and in his recorded therapy. It would be difficult to sum up the importance of what Yalom addresses in one paper, but I will attempt to note the parts of Yalom’s writing which stood out most to me. I hope to cover Yalom’s thoughts on avoiding diagnosis, letting the patient matter, using the here and now, therapist transparency, feedback, and freed & responsibility as in-depth as possible. Moreover, I hope to address how these thoughts will impact my own approach to therapy and how they interact with my faith.

Reading about the experiences leaves me feeling more empathic towards my clients with depression. Though I do speak about depression and suicide in my Coping with Loss group, which I facilitate, reading this book leaves me with a greater understanding of what my clients may be going through (especially when it is difficult for them to express themselves).

Thus, the client would have to be categorized with the assumption that he has experienced in his past “severed free and open communication with his peers”. This would mean that a client with clear and reciprocated communication with her loved ones would not find use in Client Centered Therapy. According to Truscott (2010), “our efforts to feel good about ourselves we tend to try to incorporate others' expectations― thereby denying our true selves and adopting instead a conditional self― resulting in feelings of disorganization and emotional pain. If, on the other hand, we experience genuineness, nonjudgmental caring, and empathy in our relationships with others, then we can achieve our potential as persons” (p.70-71). Thus, a client with emotional support can manage his feelings easier then someone without any emotional support. This still leaves the client with emotional support with the expectation that she should not have any difficulty with expressing her emotions.

Another issue with the assignment is the topic. Who really wants to discuss their feelings on death? Truthfully, I know my challenge with this topic is because it is a personal battle that I have already had difficulties with in many areas of my life. I have always had a difficult time accepting or dealing with death. I struggle with death professionally as I see so many counseling clients that have been negatively impacted by loss. I struggle tonight as a teacher with the realization that