Analytical Summary : How Helicopter Parents Are Ruining College Students

Helicopter parents often send the unintentional message to their child saying that they are incompetent of doing things on their own - like the things they attempt to accomplish independently are wrong. Instead of letting their children experience a sense of autonomy by allowing them to accomplish things on their own, an overprotective parent would step in and take control; again promoting dependency. A lot of times, such dependency carries on into adulthood (Sade 1). Instead of being a mature, responsible adult and taking things into their own hands; they call on their parents whenever things get strenuous in their lives. Likewise, adults who still depend on their parents for everything do not mature mentally and sometimes do not have the skills needed to become successful on their own.

The conclusion of the article “How Helicopter Parents cause Binge Drinking” by Caitlin Flanagan is that Helicopter Parents, get real parents, cause college kids to binge drinking. Caitlin has many premises, but not all are fool-proof premises and contain fallacies. However, the structure of her argument is relatively sound. If all of her premises were proven true then the conclusion that all helicopter parents cause their kids to Binge Drink would be true for every case.

​Did you know that in the US, only 16% of household include a married couple raising their children (​Krogstad). Alfred Lubrano in his work “The Shock of Education: How College Corrupts”, talks about the changes he experienced in college and how it affected his relationship with his parents (531-537). Lubrano claims that the enrichment of education expands the distance between the college students and their parents (532). I disagree with his point and suggest that it is not the college education that creates the distance, and in some cases the aloofness is caused before reaching the college age. Several factors contribute to dissonance in parent-child relationship.

A parent’s parenting styles are as diverse as the world we live in today. Nowadays, parents only want what is best for their children and their parenting styles plays a crucial role in the development of children which will in the long run, not only effect the child’s childhood years, but later prolong into their adult life as well.

Parenting is not one of the easiest jobs in the world to have; you either are responsible enough to parent or you're not responsible enough.You have to be able to raise a child from birth and teach he/she all the necessary tools to succeed in life. As said in The Blackwell Encyclopedia of Social Work, “Parenting is the process of promoting and supporting the physical, emotional, social, and intellectual development of a child from infancy to adulthood” (245). All parents will raise their children in different ways, whether they are very strict or they’re lenient, others can be easy going and strict depending on the situation and the way they group up will shape them into who they become as adults as shown in The Glass Castle with Jeannette Walls and her parents.

It’s true that different parents have distinct parenting styles. Each child must be disparate from another due to cultural background and upbringing. Three major parenting styles that have been around are tiger, helicopter, and free range parenting. In tiger parenting, parents are strict, while in free range it is just the opposite, parents let loose and let their children be who they are and allow them to take risks. The article “I am a helicopter parent, and I don’t apologize” by Elizabeth Fairfield Strokes is an epitome of helicopter parenting and what goes on in a mind of helicopter parent. Helicopter parenting refers to "a style of parents who are over focused on their children," says Carolyn Daitch, Ph.D., director of the Center for the Treatment of Anxiety Disorders near Detroit and author of Anxiety Disorders: The Go-To Guide. "They typically take too much responsibility

In high school, a parent has to be aware of everything that goes on with their child's life. Then their child grows up and blossoms into an adult that continues their education into college. There in college the parents of these blossoms are no longer as aware of what goes on with their school life. These parents have little control over what goes on academically and socially while their adult children are in college. In the article, “College Kids Have Too Much Privacy” Michele Willins shows us that parents have a right to know what is going on with their children’s college life.

Does excessively micromanaging kids by overprotective parents affect their life post-college? Julie Lythcott-Haims addresses this concern supplementary to many others written in her book, How to Raise an Adult: Break Free of the Overparenting Trap and Prepare Your Kids for Success. The key theme is outlined perfectly, as Lythcott shows a great deal of concern for these children’s parents, as they do essentially everything for their child(ren). “Meanwhile, each year I saw more and more parents come to campus with their freshman kid and then . . . stay, literally or virtually, to: ask questions; select courses, activities, majors, internships, and careers; solve problems; handle conflicts; defend and advocate for their student; register for classes;

A college freshman walks into her dorm room and collapses onto the bottom bunk. One would assume that since it is her first week being on campus she is tired and overwhelmed from all of the freshman activities, but in reality it is her parents who are exhausting her. Her parents got a hotel room for move in day, and they haven’t left her alone since. Multiple research sources suggest that levels of parental involvement have been rising over the past decade, and according to Cline and Fay (1990) this high level of parental involvement is now commonly known as “helicopter parenting” (qtd. in Weinstein). These helicopter parents have definitely “grabbed the attention of scholars, media, and academic institutions” (Odenweller, Booth-Butterfield,

She discusses the result of students not being taught how to take care of themselves. A report by a business-research group by the name of, The Conference Board, found that incoming graduates were lacking skills such as communication and decision making (Whelan 258). Employers want to hire strong, skilled leaders who can perform tasks in the correct manner. When a fresh college graduate is put into the job market, who knows if they will be able to make important company decisions, communicate effectively on the phone or in person. If an over involved parent has done these things for their son or daughter all their life, they are not going to know how to handle specific situations in which they will need a select set of skills.

Helicopter Parents As the world evolves and changes, parents become more paranoid that the world is also becoming less safe. Due to this accusation, parents are “babying” their children and thus not allowing them to grow up. This results in children who are less mature than their peers and who don't really know how to get what they need, how to be safe or how to interact with their peers.

The hypervigilance of parents where they dictate everything that their child does actually does damage to the child because it stunts the development of internal motivation in these students (Margolies, 2016). If my parents had told me what clubs to be in, what sports to do, what classes to take, and what homework to do at what time then I never would have developed the motivation to choose for myself. It would have actually made me less capable of choosing things for myself, thus causing more stress in my life as more responsibility would fall on me as my schooling continues. The other dangerous way that this forced culture of perfectionism damages these youths is when they seem to be the perfect student, excelling in their studies in high school, and then without this constant support they crash in college and can quickly spiral out of control, not knowing how to handle this new stress as they no longer have the hypervigilance or the praise of their parents to keep them going. Helicopter parents think that by controlling these aspects of their child’s life will benefit them and create the best possible outcome for them. This is very obviously false as it is creating the situation of a severely underdeveloped child.

Throughout my whole life all I could really remember is playing sports and always playing them very competitively, and having my parents very involved. There was a lot of pressure put on me from a young age, all the way up into even now playing college football. I was raised with “helicopter” parents rather than the “laid back” parents. The best moments I can remember is just throwing the football around and playing small games in the neighborhood, no pressure just simply playing because I want to. Unnecessary pressure on sport from parents and what style of parenting is something I have put a lot of time and effort into studying. Putting to much pressure on your kids in sport could lead to; physiological affects, bad relationship with the parents, eating disorders, burnout of sports all together, kid not reaching his/her full potential, being a “helicopter parent” leads to children being afraid to voice their opinion, or afraid to fail, or even act as who they are and not what there parents want them to be. While there is know perfect way to be a parent while your child is playing youth sports, the majority of parents in my generation are putting to much pressure on their children and being “helicopter” parents, which could lead to many negative consequences. There are many interpretations of what a helicopter parent is, one of my favorites comes from authors Foster W. Cline and Jim Fay from their book Parenting With

My parents, my father specifically, believed that children should obey their elders without question and without hesitation. This outlook on parenting stems from their cultural background as Vietnamese immigrants. In my culture, family is structured

What may be the most noticeable characteristic of these parents is their over involvement in their child’s academics. They see their child’s school work and academic activities as something that is for the child and parent together instead of for the child alone (How Not to Be a Helicopter Parent). Therefore, when the child does not do well on any given thing, the parent feels guilty as if it were their fault that the child failed (How Not to Be a Helicopter Parent).