Are Men Forced To Cry Research Paper

A boy longs for connection at the same time he feels the need to pull away, and this opens up an emotional divide. This struggle between his need for connection and his desire for autonomy finds different expression as a boy grows. But, regardless of their age, most boys are ill-prepared for the challenges along the road to becoming an emotionally healthy adult. Whatever role biology plays (and that role is by no means clear) in the ways boys are characteristically different from girls in their emotional expression, those differences are amplified by a culture that supports emotional development of girls and discourages it for boys. Stereotypical notions of masculine toughness deny a boy his emotional resources. We call this process,

In the article “Toxic Masculinity Is Killing Men: The Roots of Male Trauma,” Kali Holloway explains why the ideal of masculinity is so unrealistic and harmful to men. Holloway also gives many studies and writings to back the idea that to be a strong man you have to suppress feelings and pain. In these studies, it proclaims that both men and women start off equally feminine as babies and that these ideas are taught to boys and girls as they grow up learning how to “be a man.” Holloway goes on to say that masculinity is not just taught by parents, but also taught through television and movies that portray men as masculine and strong. There are many examples given showing the ways men release their stress differently than women. This makes it

Crying is something that everyone here does; it is a normal part of everybody’s life. However, many cultures believed that when a male cries, his tears were a sign of manliness. In the article “How boys become a men” Jon Katz gives some examples to explain why many man pressured to be tough, to act strong, and they would not allow to show their emotions, pain and fear. This article focuses on the lesson that boys learn from their young ages which effects their lives.

Hypermasculinity requires a man to be, frankly, emotionally constipated. He cannot show tears or sadness. Many young boys are told to stop crying and “man up”. By repressing natural expressions of emotion such as crying, men have withdrawn emotional states. Men being forced to repress their emotions and being raised into fearfulness of expressing these emotions, is dangerous. This emotional repression makes men more susceptible to depression and eventually suicide. Depression is commonly seen in the image of a highschool girl with no friends who is sad all the time. But that’s just not the case with most depressed people. Depression is less sadness and more emotional disconnect. This emotional disconnect of depression can be found in both men and women. Yet the same emotional disconnect of depression is something men are forced into feeling. The feeling of having to hide emotions or not being able to feel at all are signs of depression, but are the sort of traits society wants men to have- in order to Act Like A Man. When men do show emotion, it must be raw and powerful and dominating. It has to be a play of power against other men and especially a play to show power over women. They fight. And, in the most extreme case, they kill.

Males are taught to be tough, and if they do cry they are seen as soft. When Lord Voldemort and his army gather at Hogwarts, Draco Malfoy is seen crying and shuttering among other Hogwarts students at the idea of returning back to the dark side. Malfoy is yelled at by his father for disobeying him and acting inferior when he was asked him to come forth. The scene when Voldemort and his snake kill Snape, Snape is seen crying which generally sparks a lot of emotion for the watcher when seeing a man crying since society makes it a rare occurrence. There should not be an issue with any male expressing what they feel in a moment.

Males are interesting objects. They have to keep their chest high and stand their ground. Cowboys are supposed to have a beer belly, mustache, long comeback boots, and the upper lip mug on their face. This is how a man’s mentality should always be. Males are known to be tough and not show emotion, “Cowboys are just like a pile of rocks – everything happens to them,” (Ehrlich 1045). No matter how much they get attacked, pushed around, and so on; they are told to just stand there and deal with it. “Take it like a man,” something that is said all the time when a young boy or a grown man tries to show a “feminine” emotion. Emotion is a dull thing to a male and should not be shown. They can only be happy, or mad. There is no in between to that. If sadness is shown, then they will be called weak or a wimp, and being called

They are taught from a young age to man up and be tough in the world. The guy code inforces showing emotion to the public to be very looked upon very heavily. Kimmel inquired that “ No Wonder boys are more prone to depression, suicidal behavior, and various forms of out - of control behaviors than girls are “ (54). In my opinion, I interpret Kimmel’s quote, as he is saying for the constant pressure to follow the code, men are constantly troubled to perfect their self-image from it. Although, Kimmel is addressing how the code only pertains to males, he also is saying that men are actually sensitive, even although in society and in the code, that its not a visible thing for men to be seen emotional and sad, thus this why he makes the point to why men suffer more hurtful with their emotions around others. This is a major problem because men will seek out other ways that can harm them, instead of being able to admit their problems in front of others, despite breaking the code. It's no surprise that men are mainly the ones to not show emotions in public and others, only when in comedy movies or such, its seen more historical and groundbreaking, to witness men show their emotions. Kimmel’s statement is very powerful and makes me believe that there should be something done to break the stigma that men should be allowed to show

We had talked in class about sex and how one of the guys in the class would have to explain to their younger sister about certain things, well imagine it the other way and I having to explain certain things to my younger brother whom already knows things but gets even more informed by me. My brother felt shame in crying in front of us but we told he didn’t have to feel that way around us. Even without a solid male role model in his life he knew that there were things that men shouldn’t do. “In order to escape the threat of shame or fear, one takes on a compulsive, repetitious activity as though to busy oneself, to distract oneself, to keep awareness at bay,” Anzaldua. This quote explains how my brother dealt with his feelings but on the other hand we tried to break that and we did

For a long time, men and women have been dealing with the controversy of gender roles. In modern day, the battle for gender equality has been more known. In the story “Guys Suffer from Oppressive Gender Roles Too”, the author Julie Zeilinger explains how males are held to a more macho standard, but do have prevalent emotions. If we were to let go of these rigid rules about what is manly, there would be no standard for any gender. If that was reality, men shouldn’t have to feel humiliated about staying home, and if their companion makes more money than they do. Zeilinger talks about how males detach themselves from some emotions, and live a “life nub to a true range of human emotion” so they can meet this masculinity standard. However if males

Men are treated vastly differently than women. For example, men are expected to not show their emotions. In “why men don’t last” by Natalie Angier, a Pulitzer Prize winning reporter, she described how even when men are young boys they have their emotions shamed out of them by their parents and their peers (Angier 1011). In “The War Against Boys” Christina Hoff Sommers, a writer of several books, wrote how men have it imprinted on them at a young age that showing your emotions is a sign of weakness. Men are also taught to be self-sufficient and not ask for help (Sommers 1061). For example, there were many times when I was in school but needed help. I never asked because I always wanted to think of myself as self-sufficient, that I did not need the help from my teacher and I could figure it out myself. Now, of course, I realize how dumb that was that there is no shame in asking for help,

This is the principle argument, Masculinity as Homophobia. That is, to be a genuine man is to abstain from being female in any capacity. On the off chance that it's female to cry, show apprehension, or think about the way you look, then any man who does that is seen as unmanly and prone to have their man card pulled.

Often when boys get hurt, or fail class they will not show them out, they try to hide the emotion inside them. Over the story, it seems like boy’s are fear of what other people think of them and scare of reject, they carry on their emotion inside, they afraid people around them see their weakness. These prove why most boys don’t cry even though they are hurts. If the boy cry or act their emotional out then that boy is a sissy. Pollack states, " Men take a whole range of feelings and emotions and put those behind a mask.”(P. 73) These show that boys have to stand on their own two feet try to be tough and they are a shame to show any emotion. According to Pollack “boys are shame phobic and "some will even kill to avoid shame”. It seems like the society only allows men to express their emotion only through anger. With many strict conflicting expectations, a

The boy code has been around for many generations, passed down from father to son, like a family heirloom. It is cherished and use to make boys into men. As boys grow up they are taught that it is not ok to cry and not to show any emotion unless he is fighting for his manhood. Boys are raised with shame and a certain type of sadist way. A father’s responsibility to his son is to raise him to be a man. Sensitivity and weakness is not allowed but, if he slips up and cries, he may be shamed and may come to fear the repercussions. The things that a boy may hear are “man up”, “quit crying”, “quit being a sissy” and “unless you want a reason to cry you better shut up”. No a days instead of building them up males are treated like they must put their emotions in a box, locked away and never used in any situation.

As a boy grows into a man he faces the ever-raising mountain of masculinity. In regards to the occurrence, he finally reaches maturity he has no choice but in order to fight to retain his measly sense of manhood. He is not allowed to act feminine or else he’s not man enough, he can’t show his emotions, he has to hide that he can do anything a woman can do sans give birth. Boys grow up being told they are not allowed to cry and that they are supposed to be tough, that they are not able to be like girls and in the event that they are then they are not real boys. This concept is known as toxic masculinity, some people are not aware that men are being forced to suppress their emotions or even that toxic masculinity should be a topic that is

When boys are young they are told to toughen up or to stop acting like a girl when they are sad or want to cry. Michael Kimmel, author of “Bros Before Hos”: The Guy Code, discusses how there is a code guys are supposed to follow and how being taught natural behaviors, such as crying or talking about emotions, are wrong at a young age negatively impacts boys for their whole life. Emily Smith, the author of Life on the Island, talks about how a decrease in places that have a feeling of community increases the suicide rate among men. Everyone tells boys to act a certain way their father, coach, even people they don’t know, but this is not the only place they hear these negative statements. Television and magazine advertisements often depict men in an unrealistic way that feels unachievable and because of this young boys who view these ads feel negatively about themselves and because of the guy code they can’t share their feelings and emotions which can lead to depression or even suicide.