Arranged Marriage vs. Free-choice Marriage"Happy marriages begin when we marry the ones we love, and they blossom when we love the ones we marry" (Tom Mullen, 2005, p.1). It is argued that free-choice marriages based on love or romance, offer more independence and freedom as compared to arranged marriages where the man and woman are chosen by the parents and so there is pressure and is not so suitable and independent. However, no marriage is necessarily an ideal sort of marriage. Therefore, it becomes difficult to predict the ideal sort of marriage. The decision is upon the individual, whether he or she wants to be part of an arrange or free-choice marriage. There are two main types of marriages that are practiced in various societies and …show more content…
Also, this type of marriage is chosen because of social status. A rich family will want their heir to marry into a family that is worth their status. And lastly, very religious and cultural son and daughters will just agree to an arranged marriage because of the way they have been brought up since childhood and they know that they will not have to worry about their parents of not approving or rejecting of their choice of spouse.
On the other side, a free-choice marriage can be based on romance or friendship. The relationship between this type of marriage can be based on admiration and with a person known really well from before. If the relationship has been brought together because of romance, it often seems for both of the partners that they are not able to live without each other. In this type of marriage, timing is important. It takes time for the two people to fully understand each other and make this big decision. Romance allows the two people to spend more time together and get to know each other better. This marriage is considered very sweet and romantic. Many people imagine themselves having this type of marriage one day. The idea of falling in love with someone is great because if the person is known from before, it makes it easier knowing that the rest of the upcoming marriage life will be spent
Arranged marriage is found in various cultures and countries around the world, including Afghanistan and other parts of the Middle East; having an arranged marriage is thought of as an Afghani tradition and has been a part of life for many families. The practice of arranged marriage has advantages and disadvantages; it can create more family power and give more financial security. Sadly being forced into a marriage can disrupt the independence of the engaged, most women stop their education when they become engaged resulting in many women being illiterate. This makes it impossible for them to be successful without depending on their husbands. Arranged marriage is found in many cultures throughout the modern world, though in a lot of cases it results in a happy family it can also be very limiting on women and often girls are married before they can give consent.
In our society, we wouldn’t consider arranged marriages as a normal thing we are, use to consensual heterosexual serial monogamy. But in some countries, they do consider arranged marriages normal. In India, arranged marriages have been apart of the Indian culture since the fourth century and many consider it a central fabric of Indian society (Arranged Marriages, Matchmakers, and Dowries in India, 2000). Pakistan also considers arranged marriages as normal in Pakistani culture elders of the family are considered wise and they are the ones who help pick out a spouse a family member (Arranged Marriages are the Part of Pakistani Culture, 2012). Japan still practices arranged marriage but now less than ten percent of marriages are arranged compared to half a century ago when about seventy percent were arranged(Tying the Knot, 1998). In China, they have marriage markets where parents line the pathways share with other parents their clippings they have on their child, hoping to find a good match for their child (Epatko, 2015). Still, today many countries consider arranged marriages normal.
Arranged Marriages have been around since time can remember. An arranged marriage is a marital union between a man and a woman who were selected to be wedded together by a third party. Historically, arrange marriages were the main way to marry. In certain parts of the world, it is still the primary approach. There are two types of arrange marriages. The first is a traditional marriage where the children can, with strong objections, refuse to marry their soon to be spouse. In a forced marriage, the children have no say in the matter. Bread Givers shows an excellent representation of the pressures on children from their parents to be married against their will.
Western society today has evolved to romanticise the idea of love, and along with it, the idea of a marriage based upon love. This has therefore pushed a negative stigma onto the concept of arranged marriages. A classic example of literature that pits these two clashing ideas against each other is William Shakespeare’s ‘Romeo and Juliet’. Even today, many debate over the two, love or arranged marriages. Arranged marriages have been an international phenomenon for centuries, specifically in the continent of Asia.
Nowadays we live in a world which is full of choices and the choice of the person you would like to merry is one of the most important one. It is really hard to decide whether this person is really “yours” or it is just the illusion. Thus, can it be a better way to have somebody who decides who will you be married to? Some people think it is unfair because person doesn’t have the right of choice but the others think that arranged marriages are a good choice. Farahad Zama is one of few many people that encourages arranged marriage. In fact, in his article he tells his own story, how his parents arranged his marriage and how it worked out for him. On the other hand, Rohit Garoo opposes arranged marriage and encourages free love marriage and lists the benefits of it. Free choice marriage is a marriage in which both partners choose each other by themselves and the choice is based on factors such as physical attraction, the desire for emotional stability, love, similar outlooks, personalities, interests etc. However, this is not the only way to choose. In arranges marriages the partner is selected by elder family members but the young people may have the right to veto the choice if they strongly disagree with it. There are definitely pros and cons of both and only after taking them into consideration person can decide which to choose: arranged or free choice marriage.
Both arranged marriages and romantic marriages have good and bad points. Cultures such as India, Japan, and Ethiopia have had arranged marriages since the dawn of time. In America we allow our young adults to make their own decisions on whom to marry. Would Americans accept the practice of parents deciding whom they are going to marry without considering their wants or feelings? The answer is an emphatic NO! Americans are hopelessly romantic and fiercely believe in freedom of choice. Arranged marriages would never be accepted in American culture.
Some cringe at the third world thought of arranged marriage. However, Ji Hyun Lee’s article in The New York Times titled, “Modern Lessons From Arranged Marriages”, begins to raise questions concerning how lessons from this culturally unique phenomenon may be able to aid in non-arranged marriages in the United States with the help of experts. Michael J. Rosenfeld, associate sociology professor at Stanford University claims, “I don’t think love marriage and arranged marriage are as different as we make them out to be.” He asserts that the concept of “love marriage” mimics the ancient art of pairing in “arranged marriages,” stating that individuals end up being partnered with another whom is similar to themselves in regards to race, religion, class background, and age. Senior Research Psychologist, Robert Epstein found that parental involvement is the key to a strong arranged marriage, as the parents screen for potential deal breakers in the couples’ relationship. Many in successful arranged marriages attribute the success of their union to their parents’ involvement. Dr. Epstein notes that in a nation such as the US, we celebrate independence and freedom of choice, which is likely the reason why so many view arranged marriages with such unwavering hesitation. Although he admits that the tradition of arranged marriages does not hold much hope in gaining acceptance today, he notes an undeniable fact: when 40-50% of all American marriages end in divorce, there is logic in
Arranged Marriage is a planned marriage by the parents or guardians of the bride and groom, who have little say in the planning of the agreement. Arranged marriages in the US, would take applications and they would decline people. Arranged marriages in India, the parents ask family friends and people in their social circle about perspectives or advertisements through newspapers and marriage websites.
From the perspective of a Utilitarian, one would argue that arranged marriage is both ethical and unethical. A utilitarian decides whether an action is good or bad based on the results that bring the greatest good to the greatest number of people affected by the action. The so called good can be defined as “happiness.” In India, places where arranged marriage are very common because it is part of their culture. Therefore in a Utilitarian eyes it would be ethical to get married if it were part of your culture and geographical location because betraying your culture would do more harm and some forms of happiness are superior to others. Many couples find themselves to be part of happy marriages like we saw in the article What It’s Really Like To Have An Arranged Marriage. Sandaya, the bride, who lived in India had an arranged marriage set by her parents. She felt honored to have done this for her family and knew it was a
Arranged marriages occur all over the world and in some parts it is popular or compulsory and in others not so admired. Most
Forced arranged marriages are the most common of arranged marriages. In this marriage, you have no say in who you marry. If the son or daughter refuses, a punishment may be administered. In this marriage the parents in both families have to agree on who you marry. The parents
The importance of arranged marriage has been a subject of discussion whether arranged marriage has an advantage or it has detrimental effects on the society. The Substantial influence of arranged marriage has sparked the controversy over the potential impact of this trend in shaping the society. Also, arranged marriage is beneficial for couples, but it has some drawbacks as well, such as girl/boy doesn't need to worry about finding a life partner, a family share the responsibilities and couple belong to the same
For better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, til death do us part. The social institution of marriage is principally defined as a formally sanctioned union between two individuals by which certain rights and responsibilities are established for and between the spouses. Although marriage is observed as a cultural universal amongst all human populations on the globe, the institution of matrimony still differs in its definition according to particular cultures, regions, and religions. In the governing traditions and customs by which a life partner is selected, America wholeheartedly embraces love marriages where one’s life partner is personally selected by an individual based on his/her desires, whereas modern-day India continues to uphold its ancient traditions of arranged marriages by having close family and kin influence the selection of the spouse. As the Western world contests the Eastern practice of arranged marriages as a violation of rights and a loss of independent experience in the dating world, marital unions by modern-Indian arranged marriages are, however, morally and ethically acceptable because they ensure a satisfactory married life, preserve culture but also peace between the families, and are arranged in the belief that parents know what is best for their child.
Arranged marriage is a good thing and should be respected by those throughout the world who condemn it.
Parents will only choose spouses that are best suited for their children, and they know that their children will have the security and stability with their partners. Such arranged marriages prevents unions that are grounded on pure compulsions. It is a matrimony that may not be about love but about what is best for the couple’s future. Often, in love matrimonies, the couple is too blinded by what they perceive as “love” to see the faults of one another and their unsuitability. In arranged marriages it is the parents that decide and they offer an impartial opinion on the personality of their partner. They know what is best for their children. For example, a religious family would want their children to have the same religious background as their spouse. For example, a Muslim family would want or maybe even demand a matrimony between another Muslim families. By having an arranged marriage, families can now check and be sure of the other party’s background and make an informed decision before their children got married. In normal “love” marriages, the family might have little say in who their children falls in love with, thus reducing the chances of having an “ideal” partner. Therefore, arranged marriages has its benefits as they offer security and stability to the couple and thus preserving the families customs and practices if need be before the couple are to be