Attachment Style: How It Affects Love Relationships

Individual attachment style and its effects on adult romantic relationships were examined. The hypothesis of this literature review was that insecure attachment style would negatively affect the overall dynamic of adult romantic relationships while secure attachment would promote positive and healthy romantic relationships. Empirical studies looking at attachment style and relationship issues such as one’s views of self and others, communication, sexual intimacy, childhood family dynamic and God were evaluated. Reviews of studies were in line with the hypothesis indicating that insecure attachment does negatively affect the overall dynamic of romantic

Attachment refers to the degree to which an individual is close to non-deviant others, including, family members, friends and peers. One’s willingness to conforming to norms and expectations is dependent on how attached they are to others. This element goes on to extends

Attachment is an integral part of the human condition, through it bonds are created between child and caregiver and these bond help contribute to a developing person’s sense of self and the world around them. These feeling of connection carry over from parent, to child, to later life from the person to their partner and then their own children. Attachment theory grew out of the understanding that young children in their early fragile stages of development require protection and security to increase their chance of survival, protection is present in the form of the parents from whom physical and a psychological sense of security comes. The infant sees their parents as a protector and a secure base through which they can always turn to in moments of stress when experiencing the world (Browne & Shlosberg, 2006).

Attachment is a strong emotional connection between two people, often a bond between a child and caregiver. Since Bowlby’s (1969) theory, describing the importance of developing an attachment for successful emotional and social development, other researchers have theorised that not forming attachments affects individuals, including their possible development of mental health issues.

Attachment theory concerns the psychological, evolutionary and ethological ideas that help us understand relationships between people. Theorists believe that a child has a need to form attachments with an adult care giver to ensure adequate growth and social and emotional development. This ‘bond’ has to be maintained by the care giver and mostly uninterrupted to ensure a child grows into a happy and confident, adapted adult.

New research does show that even though the primary attachments develops during infancy as a person grow the types of attachments could be altered with new types of attachments due to positive or negative life events. Secure attachment used to be the most common type of attachment among early people but with the new generation studies shows a decline in it and a small growth in avoidant and resistant attachment

Each individual has their own style of attachment, whether it is secure attachment, ambivalent attachment, avoidant attachment, or disorganized attachment. Attachment styles develop early on in life and seem to develop over time based on one’s experiences and interactions with other people. Some seem to have more secure attachments than others and some seem more shut off and insecure with their attachments. In a study conducted by Dr. Mary Ainsworth, called “Strange Situation”, attachment behaviors were explored, where Ainsworth measured the reactions of children when separated from their caregiver. This study showed the vast differences in reactions of children with different attachment styles (Firestone 2016). Different attachment styles seem to be a product of the environment the child was raised in, whether it was a loving, secure environment, or a dysfunctional, less nurturing environment.

Children, who have been subjected to neglect or abuse in their early relationships, instead of love and sensitivity, are liable to have “attachment difficulties”. They are likely to have a negative view of themselves, others and the world around them (Bomber, 2007, Howe et al, 1999, Cassidy, 1988, in Thompson) and their readiness to learn and potential to benefit from education will be diminished. (Bomber, 2007, Lyons-Ruth & Jacobvitz, 2008). Bowlby’s attachment theory is a useful framework for understanding the confusing behaviour of these children (Bomber, 2007). Bowlby (1958) defined attachment as a “lasting psychological connectedness between human beings” and proposed that attachment can be understood within an evolutionary context

From the 1960s to the 1980s psychologists have worked and developed a four-part attachment style for adults. These styles are related to how individuals see themselves, how they see others, and how they relate to the people who are special to them. The attachment styles are secure, anxious-preoccupied, dismissive-avoidant, and fearful-avoidant.

The attachment theory has been a topic of discussion since about 1951, when introduced by John Bowlby. Mary Salter Ainsworth later created the famous “Strange Situation” experiment to test this theory (Berant, 2013). Until this point, most psychologists studied adulthood behaviors and worked backward to childhood. Bowlby believed that childhood attachments impact adulthood. (Berant, 2013). Attachment styles that the “Strange Situation” study named include secure, anxious avoidant, anxious ambivalent, and disorganized styles (Herbers, 2014). The attachment needs beginning from birth onward are important for optimum attachment with a caregiver and future security of the child into adulthood. Many factors of a child’s early caregiver experience create the style of attachment whether a family member, foster parent, or institutional caregiver. This desire for attachment can also relate to our spiritual walk through life. Caring for others and receiving God’s love can fulfill those needs and desires in our spiritual aspects. Ideal early attachment is a factor in every culture, no matter where a person originates, or what income level and the style of attachment can determine the type of adult behaviors the future holds for a person.

Attachment theory is one way of understanding relationships, and the effect it has on an individual (Bowlby, 2005). Bowlby theorized that the relationship established from birth by the primary caregiver is the foundation for the development of relationship building throughout the life cycle. This relationship instructs the infant how the environment will respond to crying, hunger, and emotional stimuli (2005). When the infant obtains a nurturing response to these stimuli the infant will have secure attachments, and provide a blueprint how the world will respond to their needs (Pearson, 2010). An unhealthy response (ignoring, yelling, etc.) perpetuates a negative development or insecure attachment giving the child an inconsistent understanding of what to expect from their environment (Pearson, 2010).

What is attachment and why is it an important aspect of intimate relationships and the human condition? Attachment and attachment theory states that there is a strong affectional tie that binds a person to an intimate companion (Sigelman & Rider, 2015). One of the first theorists that formulated this theory was John Bowlby. He proposed that, based on infants interactions with caregivers, infants construct expectations about relationships in the form of internal working models- cognitive representations of themselves and other people that guide their processing of social information and behavior in relationships (Sigelman & Rider, 2015). This research was further elaborated by Mary Ainsworth and her colleagues, who believed there were three

Another psychological factor that contributes to Pat’s behavior is his attachment style. Attachment style is a theory that explains how people go about connecting with one another emotionally and physically particularly to people close to them in a time of fear. It’s based on their view of themselves and their view of others in correlation to them. The attachment style is formed very early on in someone’s life and it usually starts with the primary relationship in a child’s life which is with mother and child but attachment style can also be molded during adulthood. This relationship sets the tones for all relationships to come and ultimately shapes how the person develops emotionally and socially. The type of attachment style each person falls into could be an explanation for their behavior in intimate relationships.

Attachment is one of the developmental milestones that begins during conception and remains throughout one’s life. It is defined as the “strong affectionate tie we have for special people in our lives that lead us to experience pleasure and joy when we interact with them and to be comforted by their nearness in times of stress” (Berk, 2011, p. 264). When an individual meets the child’s needs, an attachment begins to form. The primary caregiver, preferably the mother, is considered to be the initial secure base for the child. The emotional connection infants have towards their mother is what theorist Sigmund Freud believes to be the “foundation for all alter relationships” (as cited in Berk, 2011, p. 264). However, by the second half of the first year, infants begin to develop attachments towards anyone who responds to their needs.

Relationships are necessary throughout life and all relationships, be them romantic or friendly, have an important impact on who we are. From birth, an attachment is formed with our mothers and close caregivers, and, as we progress throughout life, that attachment transforms and evolves in many different ways and creates a framework for future relationships (Bowlby, 1969, 1973, 1980). As we develop and change as we enter into adulthood, these attachment styles adjust and present themselves in new ways in both social context and in romantic security and conflict resolution (Shi, 2003). Eventually relationships are formed with whom we want to spend the rest of our lives, and our attachment styles from infancy and childhood present themselves as these relationships develop (Gouveia, T., Schulz, M. S., & Costa, M. E. 2015). In a romantic relationship, attachment style can influence the way that you and your partner react and communicate with one another and resolve issues and conflicts (Shi, 2003). Healthy relationships are more likely to form between people who experienced a secure attachment in childhood. This gives them high levels of intimacy, trust, and positive self-regard. In contrast, unhealthy relationships are more likely to develop between individuals with insecure attachment styles, who often feel unworthy of affection, are emotionally unavailable, and closed off to intimacy (Mikulincer & Shaver, 2003). Attachment styles in adult romantic relationships