preview

Bad Moms: A Short Story

Decent Essays

"So, wait, let me get this straight-" About 15 minutes into seclusion she CALLED, not texted, her best friend to hear what she had to say about this horrible atrocity to her 'freedom' as an adult of this family. "-you're parents payed a guy to watch the house....with you in it...doesn't that technically means he's Babysitting YOU...and not the house?" OH FUCK, that made sense, what if he really was here to babysit her? "This is such bullshit." "You're telling me...this totally gets in the way of Mark and I pressuring you into throwing a wild party." "Oh, like the one you tried to get me to throw back in 7th grade...then in 12th when my parents were out of town on a date in the adjacent city?" "Yeah, big house, big party, what part of that …show more content…

Remember that, did you learn nothing from Bad Moms?" "Never saw it." There was a long pause on the other end of the line before she heard the other woman reply with a hushed toned "You're a sinner...." "HA-what does that make you, the girl with the Dragon Tattoo?" "It's a FUCKING Honey Badger and you know it. My original idea when I was 5 was to get a Unicorn with a shotgun...but the whiskey chose Honey Badger...Which I now presume to be my Spirit animal." Veronic tended to be very impulsive about her life decisions...yet most of the time those life decisions didn't seem to come back to haunt her later on. She was a perfect imperfect person who managed to dodge the bullet on a lot of close calls that could have ended with her license being revoked in High School or coming so close to landing on a cactus while hiking in the desert with her just as, if not more, adventurous boyfriend. "If you ever do get the time and Captain Kill-Joy is passed out or...somehow...goes mysteriously missing...We're going to Social Gather the FUCK out at your …show more content…

She presumed he'd brought his suitcase and amenities because...House Sitting meant you were going to stay more than a day, so here's to hoping they don't kill each other as she opened the door to see a man she hadn't expected to see...older than her...yes...buff...handsome by the standards of most woman who loved nothing more than a cock...but..other than that, he was actually kind of cute by her standards...At first she didn't say much of anything...other than her widened eyes...she was too shocked to say anything at first...confused...then-"uuuuuh......Hi?..I'm guessing you're that guy my Dad was raving

Get Access