Benefits Of Living Together Before Marriage

Hey, Mom I just want you to know that Bob and I are going to live together. I know that you and dad do not agree with it, nonetheless, I am an adult and I am going to move into his place tomorrow. How can a parent see a child go through with a decision like this and know that he or she is making a wrong choice? Sometimes a young adult may make a choice that a parent does not like. As a result, a young adult has now plunged into cohabitation. Does it really matter if you cohabitate before marriage? In finding the answer to this problem, I have come across two articles which help explain the pros and the cons of the question, “Should couples cohabitate or get married?” The first article is Sliding Versus Deciding: Inertia, the Premarital Cohabitation Effect. When a couple has “dedication commitment” (Stanley, Rhoades, and Markmann, 503) with each other, cohabitation works for partners. It is likely your partner will stay in the relationship and want to work it out no matter what happens. The second article is The Verdict on Cohabitation vs. Marriage. While many people think that cohabiting is really the in thing with life today. Marriage trumps over cohabitation. Some marriage may not have the “happily ever after” it still has a better start to their life as a couple.

Cohabitation is unstable because it tends to be short lived. Stott uses research studies to show that unmarried couples living together are less stable than their married counterparts. After ten years together the likelihood of a first marriage breaking up is 33%, compared to 66% for unmarried cohabitants. People argue that livening together before marriage is like a trial period and it helps make relationships even stronger. However Stott points out that this is not true, in fact couples who cohabit before marriage are 50% more likely to divorce within five years than those who did not cohabit. He also points to a study that shows alcoholism, depression, and general mental illness are more prevalent among those who cohabit. Stott’s second argument against cohabitation is that it is informal. Marriage includes vows, a binding pledge of two peoples never ending love and commitment to one another. Cohabitation requires no such commitment which leaves the couple on un-solid ground. Stott says, “in the case of cohabitation, the relationship is ambiguous and the degrees of commitment between the two people may be unequal”. The inadequacy of cohabitation is Stott’s third argument against living together before marriage. Cohabitation is inadequate because it is not a public commitment of a couples mutual love and respect for one another. I agree with Stott’s assertion that “a couples commitment needs to be public as well as permeant, and the role of the family, the law, and the church make the difference between marriage and cohabitation”. Stott used very well reasoned arguments to show that cohabitation is wrong. I agree with all of his points and I too believe it is wrong to cohabit before marriage. God does not set rules to take the fun out of life, he sets them to protect us and make our lives better. We need to respect his

Cohabitation is living together before marriage. There is also different name for it such as, Duration of the relationship, Frequency of Overnight Visits, Emotional or Sexual Nature of the Relationship and Sex of the Partners. As well as there are different names of cohabitation there are also different types of it.

Should we consider moving in before getting married? In the New York Times Magazine, the article The Downside of Cohabiting before Marriage states that “In 1960, about 450,000 unmarried couples lived together. Now the number is more than 7.5 million. The majority of young adults in their 20s will live with a romantic partner at least once, and more than half of all marriages will be preceded by cohabitation”. (1) Considering moving in with your partner before marriage you will get to know each other a lot better. The Census Bureau reports that over 40-50 percent of married couples in the United States end in divorce. When couples live with their partner prior to marriage, the responsibility is now of two instead of one. Splitting things like bills and rents has never been so easier. Moving is a huge step in a relationships. Two people are essentially committing loyalty to one another as they move in together. Living together is a better option prior to getting married.

According to Dalton Conley, cohabitation is the “living together in an intimate relationship without formal, legal, or religious sanctioning”(Conley 458). From this, one can assume that cohabitation happens primarily between two people that are in a relationship. When looking at cohabitation within the United States, it has become more evident that it is slowly increasing in popularity. During the early ages, cohabitation was considered very scandalous and was frowned upon, but as the years progress, more and more couples start living together. Whether it is to experience the lifestyle they would have living together as if they were married or living together in order to save money, more and more people are living with their significant other.

Marriage used to be essential to a couple sharing a life together. Now, it is becoming increasingly common for couples to live together before marrying. Sharing a single rent check, shyness about making a life-long commitment, or just the popularity of cohabiting celebrity couples, such as Johnny Depp and Vanessa Paradis, are all reasons moving in together before marriage is clearly more popular than ever. While generally viewed as the perfect opportunity for couples to ensure they are a good match before becoming “marriage-official,” cohabiting may actually increase relationship instability, negatively affects health, and even has negative impacts on children.

Motives for why people might live with their significant other before marriage can include the birth of a child, the savings involved because they want to see if they are compatible living together, or one partner wants to rush things. According to Arron Chambers, The effects of living together before marriage include higher divorce rates, unhappier marriages, higher amounts of arguments, less satisfactory sex lives, higher chances of pregnancy, and negative effects on the children (Chambers). The prior listed causes and effects may vary from relationship to relationship and the limitations are numerous depending on the couple.

Random Blogger discusses in her article living together before marriage is a very great idea for couples. She claims cohabitation helps to get know each other better than dating for a long time. The author’s main point is encouraging couples to live together before they get married. Her audience is people who can accesses her web cite and specially couples how didn’t get married yet.

Research varies on the consensus of cohabitation and it’s effects on marital successes or failures, but according to Wendy D. Manning and Jessica A. Cohen, premarital cohabitation is not linked to marital instability. (Manning & Cohen, 2012.) From 1970-1990, marriages that followed cohabitation had higher divorce rates than those that did not cohabit. From the 2000’s on, however, there has been a much smaller, or even neutral, risk of divorce for couples who cohabited prior to marriage. (Kuperberg, 2014). Studies have found that whether debating

I hate you! People who loved each other and shared everything can’t take it anymore. They decide to divorce and forget everything. huffingtonpost.com claimed that 50 percent of marriages in the U.S. end in divorce. What’s wrong? Why they didn’t make it? Couples who live together before marriage appear to have a much higher chance of divorce if they marry, said Kamp Dush in the book ‘’Journal of Marriage and Family’’. Some people would agree that couples should live together before marriage, some would not. Their decisions may be based on their strong beliefs, backgrounds, their parents ' standards or the statistics of marriage versus divorce. The question of, ˜Should Couples Live Together Before Marriage? ' I strongly believe they should not, and today I want to show you reasons why.

Therefore, living together will ensure the couple whether or not they can get along in the future. Those people consider pre-cohabitation as an effective way to prepare themselves for being a family. According to Popenoe David, “in case the relationship goes sour, they can avoid the trouble, expense and emotional trauma” (4). It is a good idea to live together because if the couples have troubles they can just move out and continue with their separate lives without being obliged to undergo the different procedures of divorce. In the end, perhaps after living with various people, a person will finally find their appropriate partner for marriage and be happy. Popenoe points out that, “living together helps you see past romanticized notions and clue in to what marriage will really be like”(8). Accordingly, choosing reality as a primary factor to determine the result of cohabitation is a wise decision. People who cohabitate get a clue to see whether or not they will be able to share their lives with the partners they have chosen and what kind of disagreements might proceed within the relationship. Overall, the best opportunity of living up to one-another’s assumptions is to apprehend what they really are in advance and know what they care about.

Although marriage has been a central factor and gives meaning to human lives, the change in people’s lifestyles and behaviors through a long period of social development has resulted in alternate choices such as being single or nonmarital living. As a result, cohabitation has become more popular as a trendy life choice for young people. The majority of couples choose cohabitation as a precursor to marriage to gain a better understanding of each other. However, there are exceptions, such as where Thornton, Azinn, and Xie have noted: “In fact, the couple may simply slide or drift from single into the sharing of living quarters with little explicit discussion or decision-making. This sliding into cohabitation without

These constraints lead some cohabiting couples to marry, even though they would not have married under other circumstances. On the basis of this framework, Stanley, Rhoades, et al. (2006) argued that couples who are engaged prior to cohabitation, compared with those who are not, should report fewer problems and greater relationship stability following marriage, given that they already have made a major commitment to their partners. Several studies have provided evidence consistent with this hypothesis (Brown, 2004; Rhoades, Stanley, & Markman, 2009).

In todays’ world, with increased incidence of unsuccessful relationship or marriages, there are some people who want/prefer to live together before marriage so that they can understand each other and they don’t have to experience a painful divorce. In my point of view, this is another option/type of marriage. Because if the relationship won’t work successfully then they can separate their ways easily and live happily. By living together before marriage, they have time to know about each other's living style and behavior and their relation get even stronger than before but if it does not work then they can move ahead in their lives before taking a wrong step of living together for the whole life but sometimes living together is against to some family principles, ethics of society, religious point of view. Sometimes these types of relationships are very successful without any regret in life and on the other hand it comes out as an unsuccessful and worst relationship. But I think advantages are more powerful than disadvantages.

For today’s young adults, the first generation to come of age during the divorce revolution, living together seems like a good way to achieve some of the benefits of marriage and avoid the risk of divorce. Couples who live together can share expenses and learn more about each other. They can find out if their partner has what it takes to be married. If things don’t work out, breaking up is easy to do. Cohabiting couples do not have to seek