Benefits of Friendship

How does one define family? Throughout our readings, we find ourselves learning the ideas of theorist, concepts, and definitions to help us define and describe what family is. The family could possibly be what or who we say they are, or in simpler Bozett’s term, who the patient says it is! (Plumer, 2010). A family could consist possibly of values, roles, communication, environment, and relationships. Families may transition through all of these principles that either unites them or tears them apart. For instance, the movie Mrs. Doubtfire portrays these perceptions of what family is when family processes are shifted within a household. We will now discuss in more detail of the family assessment found throughout the movie starring the Hillards.

In today’s society, family is often attempted to be organized within a social structure. Within this structure family typically is consisted of mom, dad, daughter, and son. However, many families do not fit into this configuration. These families may include same sex couples, separated or divorced families, extended families, or even blended families. Even though these families may be happy and healthy, to many they are not considered real families. Going along with the topic of imperfect families, both Barbara Kingsolver and Richard Rodriguez try to break down the traditional family structure through their writing. While Kingsolver’s “Stone Soup” and Rodriguez’s “Family Values” explore the ideas of different family structures and traditional American values, “Stone Soup” breaks down what an actual family is like while “Family Values” expresses the value of family in different cultures.

There are many different family dynamics in today’s society. But what really makes a family? Every definition found has defined family, in simple terms, as “A father and a mother raising their children together.” However, not every family is like that. Most families are not like that at all. Different aspects come into play in families such as divorce, death, and abandonment that can redefine the family structure, either for the better or for the worse. A family does not have to consist of the traditional sense of the nuclear family, but rather a family can consist of friends, step-siblings, step-parents, half siblings, or family members outside the immediate circle of parents and brothers and sisters. Anyone who can come together is a family;

Kingsolver expresses that each family has an opportunity to be happy and blossom, despite how many members of the family they have or who they grow up with. “The sooner we let go of the fairy tale of families functioning perfectly in isolation, the better we embrace the relief of the community,” (Kingsolver

Prior to enrolling in American Families at The University of Mount Union, I had a predisposition to what I perceived a perfect family looked like. I envisioned a nuclear family with parents who are madly in love and children who thrive from tremendous emotional support. After weeks of studying the topic of American families more in depth in and outside of the classroom, my perception has changed. I have learned the important concept that every family is a unique, diverse unit. The service-learning project provided me with the opportunity to apply many topics discussed in class, such as family structure, communication patterns, and the Symbolic Interaction Theory to a real American family.

Most families are complicated but supportive. For example, a family could argue a lot, but still love one another. In Alice Walker’s “Everyday Use” mama still supports her daughters even though, they’re not around much. Their issues are not unique because my family has its issues, too. The family in “Everyday Use” and my family both have similarities and differences regarding siblings, bonds, and mothers.

The second chapter, of the book “Family Interaction”, focuses on the theme of family strategies and boundaries. While reading, I noticed that my family has similarities and dissimilarities with other family members. Several topics that interested me were open and closed boundaries, and maintenance resources. My family is enmeshed and has internal boundaries, but other members of my family are on a continuum. For example, my family is very accepting and open to letting friends and spouses come over our house for special occasions the holidays. However, as a family we can be very different as a sub-unit. For example, with my mother I was often allowed to stay the night over a friend’s house, and later when I got older my boyfriends were allowed

Steven Ozment believed that so many people are preoccupied with family similarities that they fail to notice the stunning differences. Ozment recognized that focusing on one family inhibits generalizations, and therefore looks at how different scholars and historians viewed the family system. Philippe Aries was known a study that stated that children were the victims of parents and society and looked at the treatment of children to develop the “modern family”. Additionally, Aries believed that a family so emotionally detached couldn’t overcome this detachment without changing. It is necessary to change your way of life in order to have a strong relationship.

My own personal experience plays a part here as I don’t believe my family was ever “fully actualized.” Independence and autonomy was stressed, however, warmth and connectedness between members was not. Feelings were definitely suppressed in my household growing up, and even today sharing openly feels awkward. Whitaker, as well as Satir, has inspired my theoretical framework because I see the importance of the affective or emotional layer of family interactions.

Friendship is one of life 's greatest treasures. Friends that are loyal are always there to make you laugh when you are down, they are not afraid to help you avoid mistakes and they look out for your best interest. This kind of friend can be hard to find, but they offer a friendship that will last a lifetime. Other friends may not be quite as loving. The pain caused by a friendship marred by betrayal is not easy to overcome. In fact, many poems find their inspiration from the joy brought about by a loving friendship or the pain caused by a failed friendship. (Oorvi, Naina, Diana)

Society is composed of many elements based on values, traditions, cultures, government’s policies etc.; and family is one of the main basic ingredients, forming the society. Therefore, as the society changes its element, family is also forced to change the flow of life. Yet, during the past 50 years, our society has undergone big social transformations which are seen as “dramatic and unparallel changes” or a “veritable revolution”. Thus, the two basic forms of family, the extended family and the

Samuel Clemens and Mary Mason Fairbanks had a friendship, but different. Sam describes Mary in his letters as young and a mother figure. She shows strong criticism towards his bad habits and tells him things he should know. A mother instinct is right most of time in wanting the best for her children. Mary was a woman who speaks her mind especially towards Samuel she feels she can tell him anything since there friends. Having a friendship with someone is based on communication, honesty, being there when needed. Sam Clemens was thirty-one and Mary Mason Fairbanks was thirty-nine very close in age. The two met in June of 1867 loading the steam ship in Quaker City and made their way to Brooklyn. Sam and Mary both love to write and found out the two were writing for different newspapers in their hometown. When starting a conversation with someone you will find out information that could relate to each other. Such as what interests between the two, like or dislikes, and the background (Stahl, 2008).

Imagine this: you are feeling down because you have an issue with your family and you need someone to talk to but there is nobody. The problem will get worse and worse, generating more sadness and self-hate. This is the scenario of a person who does not have a true friend to talk with. Friendship has a big impact on the well-being of a teenager. In this essay, I will discuss the positives and negatives of a teenage friendship.

There is really no crime in considering every human being as one, both the blacks and the whites. There are some things that can’t be achieved when we do not unite within ourselves and create a meaningful bond. Robert Hansel stated that “I cannot, and would not judge, by what my eyes may see. For the skin on a man cannot identify his true Identity”. Discrimination today isn’t deliberate, but let’s give it a careful thought; it’s actually not meant to be because whatever we have in our minds we exhibit. Segregation can be defined as the isolation of a race, class or ethnic group by enforced or voluntary residence in a restricted area by barrier to social intercourse by discriminatory means (Merriam Webster Dictionary). Friendship should be cherished because we definitely don’t know where we would end up, either a direct friend or a friend of a friend. We could develop ourselves by being aware of things that are new around us i.e. getting acquainted with people and knowing how to accommodate people around us. We should know that no one has the responsibility to think for us, we own our decision and our rights, we have the right to do whatever we want to do and where and how we want to do it. But the period of the 1950s this Act wasn’t in reality because of the pessimistic behavior, lack of courage and determination that was exhibited by the Blacks while the Whites exhibited lack of love and trust. This behavior act was abolished with the help of Rosa Parks’, Martin Luther King.Jr, and Mr. E.D Nixon, Clifford Durr, when they decided to do a movement on the issue Black segregation in the Montgomery Bus Boycott Movement. Studies have shown that people do not have issues responding to the issues of people that they do not know, but one thing they know for sure is that once a friend is insulted they are available to support that friend.

Remember that old television show" Happy Days?” Well, when I was in the fifth grade I remember thinking, "My family is like ‘Happy Days’." We were happy and there was plenty of laughter and love to go around. Furthermore, like the television show, there were plenty of struggles and some kind of dilemma to solve before the night was over. No matter the problems the day may have brought, I always went to bed feeling happy, safe, and loved. Unlike the majority of kids in my fifth-grade class with broken homes, I just knew that my parents would be together forever. After reading Bradshaw on: The Family by John Bradshaw, I can see now that I may not have had a perfect family.