Bible Verses On Forgiveness In Marriage

People are taught to “forgive and forget” in order to be happy, afterall living with a grudge can being a serious damper in ones life.

Forgiveness is what holds and brings relationships together. If you stay angry for long, your heart stubbornly hardens. But if you choose to forgive, you will be filled with the grace of God. We are all sinners and should never carry a

As I was reading the chapter on forgiveness in Psychology, Theology, and Spirituality in Christian Counseling by McMinn (2011), the personal life experience that jumped out to me was when I had to make the decision to truly forgive my ex-boyfriend and his parents for the emotional pain they caused me. After living in New Jersey for a month and spending time with my boyfriend and his family, working, and taking care of an elderly lady with dementia my world came crashing down on me. My ex-boyfriend’s parents discovered sin in his life and told me I could no longer pursue a relationship with him because of the sins he had committed. After finding out the sinful things my ex-boyfriend had done, I chose to forgive him. I also chose to give him a second chance at a relationship with me, but my effort to salvage our relationship was futile.

Forgiveness is not just practiced by saints and not only benefits its recipients but have strong connection with person’s physical, mental and spiritual health. It plays a great role in the health of families, communities and nations. Forgiveness provides common ground for love, acceptance, harmony and true happiness Most spiritual and religious leaders of the world will agree that forgiveness of oneself and others is one way to clear the mind, heart and soul and may result in a feeling of increased peace and happiness.

It is also vital to look at Wilson’s view on the practice of forgiveness and how if an individual decides to ignore it, it can place a road block in their process of change. She believes that God speaks about forgiveness for the following reasons:” (1) we are all sinners with whom to relate so we’ll need to become skillful forgivers (2) God makes forgiveness a centerpiece of our healing process because living in un-forgiveness is so much worse (Wilson, 2001).

Love doesn’t keep a score of wrongs. We must understand that forgiveness is a commitment and choice to show mercy and not hold things against our spouse. The final way you can show love through words of affirmation is with humble words. We have to be sure to make requests and not demands by knowing one another’s desires and expressing those desires in loving way. Requesting your desires gives your spouse the choice to love you. If your spouse’s love language is words of affirmation you can compliment your spouse to others when they are not around, tell them how much you appreciate them, and write them love letters. (pages 37-50)

The motivation and tendency of people to forgive others remains an important topic of discussion. In today’s society most people at some period have experienced feeling of un forgiveness towards friend, or relatives. “Forgiveness was defined as the ability to relinquish of resentment towards others” (Baskin & Enright, 2004, p. 80).

Our God forgives our daily sins for he knows that we are imperfect. Yearningly, I hope my children to imitate this Godly quality and “forgive one another freely”, thus building strength in their faith in their relationships, whether it is with God, their spouse, or their friends. All of my relationships are present today due to forgiveness. Optimistically, I wait to teach my children to resemble forgiveness so they will cultivate strength and be unmovable with their faith. When people witness my future offspring and I demonstrate these acts of forgiveness, kindness will continue and flourish in the family, community, and hopefully the world.

Forgiveness has been defined in many ways by psychologists and researchers with no one universal definition. Hill (as cited in Maltby, Day and Mackaskill 2001) state that it is widely agreed that forgiveness involves a willingness to abandon resentment, negative judgement and indifferent behaviour towards the person who has hurt them Although research is recent, from the last 15 years, it has helped develop our understanding of forgiveness . Research has shown that forgiveness gives positive mental health and prevents the development of mental disorders such as anxiety, depression and stress. Two major models of forgiveness are Enright’s model and Worthington’s (2001) pyramid model to REACH forgiveness. Both these models involve steps and

The question asked was, is there a time when forgiveness is never an option. With all the information above I feel

This in turn leads to the idea in which forgiveness is a cancellation of a debt and the offended party no longer expects repayment for the pain caused (Pettigrove, 2012). Additionally, forgiveness is the release of bitterness or anger as an effect of an apparent offense while ceasing to demand punishment (Pettigrove, 2012). Furthermore, it begins by accepting what has happened and choosing to let go by making a decision to forgive and love the offender by canceling the debt (Pettigrove, 2012). Likewise, it releases judgement as well as thoughts of revenge or ill-will to the one who caused harm while resuming some form of a relationship with those who caused the hardship (Pettigrove, 2012). What is more, it is taking the responsibility for one’s own feelings while taking back control of one’s life instead of allowing those feelings complete control (Pettigrove, 2012). Finally, it allows God the room to move and work within our lives as He begins to heal the brokenness.

In order to forgive, it’s crucial to recognize the reality of what happened and how you were affected. Accept how you felt and how you reacted. Forgiveness frees you from the addictive adrenaline thoughts of retribution or revenge can generate, as well as the destructive tendency to self-identify as a victim.

This client was Christian and from my estimation now looking back was just beginning their walk with Christ and not on the same maturity level that I was at that time in my walk with Christ. At that time I knew how forgiveness first and foremost is obedience to God, and secondly how it can set you free from so many emotional problems, McMinn said, “Forgiveness, in its theological and spiritual context, is profound, life-giving, and transforming. When we remove the religious context and think of forgiveness only as a clinical technique, we risk losing the essence of forgiveness.” (2011, p. 254) After reading this chapter it made me re-live an area in which I was not fully equipped to help client maneuver their way through. This particular chapter has allowed me to see how vital forgiveness is in a therapeutic session, and how it must be used carefully. It is made me aware of how important my Christianity is to forgiveness, but also to assess the level my client is currently on before beginning a session on forgiveness. Reflection

In general, self-forgiveness is identified by a common ability to exhibit self-respect in spite of the acceptance of wrong-doing (Hall, J., Fincham, D., 2005). I never considered the distinction between interpersonal forgiveness and intrapersonal forgiveness. While they share many similarities, there is even greater evidence of the differences between the two. One significant difference involves the consequences of withholding forgiveness from self. It is likely that intrapersonal unforgiveness can be much more detrimental than interpersonal. Hall & Fincham state “ Self-forgiveness often entails a resolution to change” (2005). It is this process of acceptance of one’s own imperfections and sinful nature that catapults a desire for self-improvement and growth. This is a critical component of healing the soul and beginning the journey to spiritual and mental health. Also enlightening was the declaration that one can experience pseudo self forgiveness by failing to acknowledge any wrong doing and convincing him/herself that they are without fault. Finally, I was struck by the notion that self-forgiveness will typically

Asking for forgiveness and forgiving to many is the hardest thing to do but we must remember in the book of Matthew (18:21-22) Peter said to the Lord: “Lord if another member of the church sins against me, how often should I forgive? As many as seven times?” Jesus said to him, “Not seven times, but, I tell you, seventy-seven times.” In this paper, the chosen case study will give the reader a better understanding of what forgiveness is to Jesus. Forgiveness is a big part of the Bible and if Jesus forgives us of our sins we too must learn to be as forgiving as him.