Essay about Birth Order

Each child has his or her own personality. Typically the firstborn is a natural leader, while the last is always the baby, but what about the overlooked middle child? The middle child can sometimes feel lost in the crowd when it comes to family dynamics. They crave their parent’s attention and are willing to do anything to believe they have it, but immediately close up when it comes to conflict, they become people pleasers. They will do anything to make their parents, or others, happy. This makes the middle child a skilled peacemaker and negotiator (Varma, 2013). They are amazing listeners because of the fact they hate conflict,

In the texts “That That Elusive Birth Order and What it Means for You,” and “How Birth Order Affects Your Personality,” the authors give their interpretation on the importance of birth order in siblings. The author of the first text, Susan Whitbourne, stresses the unimportance of birth order. Conversely, Joshua Hartshorne, the author of the second text, says that birth order is significant to personality, but there just has not been enough evidence until recent studies.

I am a middle child. I am not the assertive, naturally confident first-born, nor am I an attention-seeking youngest child; I am the quiet, quintessential middle child. For the first 16 years of my life, I was always an afterthought to the craziness of my two sisters, and I loved it‒ it made me independent and self-reliant. I have always been very comfortable being the easy-going child, happily accepting anything that comes my way. Never have I felt that my parents loved me any less; they merely had to worry less about me than they did my siblings, with their stubbornness and constant desire for affirmation. I easily slid under the radar, preferring to mind my own business and handle problems on my own. There was never anything wrong with my

Whitbourne explains the stereotypes surrounding sibling roles, such as the first-born is most likely to take on the leadership position, and tend to “stick to rules and order, and strive toward achievement

According to Alfred Adler, the birth order of the children in a family will largely affect how they age and the personalities which they will form. First borns enter the family as the only child. They revel in the love and full attention from their parents, that is, until the second baby comes along. Suddenly, first borns are dethroned and lose the undivided attention they are used to receiving. As a result, they tend to develop a strong sense of responsibility and protectiveness over their siblings at an early age, which often leads to them becoming authoritative adults. Moreover, when there are multiple children in the family, parents will set high

a. Have you ever wondered why your older sister would try to play parent to you growing up? Or how about your baby brother that did just about anything to get the attention of anyone and everyone who would listen?

First born children who later have younger siblings may have it the worst. These children are given excessive attention and pampering by their parents until that fateful day when the little brother or sister arrives. Suddenly they are no longer the center of attention and fall into the shadows wondering why everything changed. They are left feeling inferior, questioning their importance in the family, and trying desperately to gain back the attention they suddenly lost. The first born child can become “problem children, neurotics, criminals, drunkards, and perverts” (Cloninger, 2008). However, on the flip side, the first born usually are the peacemakers of the family even though they are a pampered and spoiled child.

Though, birth order illuminates a majority of our personality traits and decisions such as, career and romantic relationships. Parents get wrapped up in the ‘firstborn haze’ and overlook how much pressure they put on older siblings. By creating a pressure to be the best and ‘in control’ the older sibling takes on the leadership role and often becomes more aligned with doing better in school than younger siblings. Determination and intelligence correspond with higher level of career, and that is just what the older sibling strives for. In fact, “100% of astronauts who’ve gone into space were either eldest children or eldest sons” (State). Relationships work better if partners differ from each other and aren’t in the same birth order. The competition can be detrimental and problematic. Alfred Adler’s birth order theory provides us with useful information to reflect our decisions and explain how you think about things. By becoming aware of it we can become more familiar with ourselves and get out of the all too familiar comfort

I was the youngest sibling in the family. But, don’t be fooled, somehow I have managed to meet and fail majority of the stereotypes resembling the youngest child. I have always been described as a natural leader, risk taker, and social butterfly.

The oldest child plays an inimitable role in the structure of her family. She has a propensity to be confident and often craves her independence at an early age. She sets the standard for her younger siblings and realizes that her actions are observed closely by impressionable eyes. This accountability often instills in her a drive to act in a respectable and responsible manner. As the oldest child in a family of eight, I have been persistent in regarding these characteristics and have enabled them to shape my identity.

Surprisingly, birth order can play an even larger role than the parent-child relationship in causing rebellion. For a long time in human history, the status and fate of a person would be determined by when he or she was born. The eldest son would inherit the family name as well as obtain most of the estate while the later-born children would receive none or less land. Although the modern society places less emphasis on such laws like primogeniture and ultimogeniture, birth order still affects how one is perceived and treated by others. According to research done on families with several children, “firstborns are rated by siblings as more self-disciplined, organized, and deliberate than younger brothers and sisters. They are the ‘achievers’ in the family” (Sulloway 170). These generalizations set high expectations for firstborns, but sometimes, firstborns shy away from the excessive pressure. Not only can unnecessary stress hinder a teenager’s emotional growth, but also can cause the teenager to reject social norms. The world unfairly expects more success out of firstborns than laterborns. However, the first child is actually not considered the most rebellious one. Surveys similarly conclude that “laterborns reject tradition…[and are] twice as likely to describe themselves as the “rebel” of the family” (Sulloway

Being the youngest child of a family cannot be easy with the constant comparison to the older siblings. Not only are firstborn siblings known for being smarter than other siblings that come along but they get a physical advantage also. Studies have shown a lot about how birth order affects the oldest and youngest sibling, but as for the middle child, they have seemed to puzzle researchers. Some researchers seem to believe the order of birth is almost as important as genetics. Researchers also go as far to say that no two children have the same set of parents due to the way parents are different with each child.

Many of the television shows that we have come to know and love include a family with a few siblings. Most of the time, they show the complex relationship that the siblings have. The oldest child is usually the most responsible, while the youngest may be outgoing, but feel inferior to their older siblings. The middle child many times feels sandwiched and takes on the roles of both the first and the last child. This is because the order in which an individual is born into a family has a large impact on his or her social and mental development. Alfred Adler was the man who introduced the world to the study of birth order. His research said that the order in which a child is born has a major impact on their development. The focus was not on the

In a study done by Catherine Salmon, middle borns were found to have more positive attitudes toward friends and siblings rather than their parents. They are significantly less family-oriented and are less likely to assist family in need. They are loyal to friends and partners (Salmon, 78). They don’t feel close to their parents, so they choose to confide in others. Salmon also writes that middle borns were found to be the most trustworthy in a marital relationship and the least likely to cheat on their partners. An additional study done by Updegraff looked at relationships between siblings. In the study, middle borns reported higher levels of intimacy with friends as opposed to their siblings (192). Middle borns with siblings of the opposite sex in particular, were more likely to be intimate with their best friend as opposed to those with same sex siblings (Updegraff et al.

Almost all of us are familiar of the Birth Order theory that Alfred Adler presented almost a century ago. Adler theorized that our personalities are hugely influenced by our chronological place in the family because