Brief Summary Of Excuse Me By Karen Katz

This is the fourth book in Karen Kelley's Southern Series. Pick up your copy of this fast paced short story today.

Unresolved / Disorganized Attachment the child has an unusually high level of fear and might be disoriented, which can be caused by a traumatic event such as a parent 's death or abuse. A person with a fearful disorganized attachment lives in an ambivalent state of being afraid of being both too close to or too distant from others.  They tend to be mixed up or unpredictable in their moods and experience emotional storms.

The children of these parents do not want to be blamed for anything. Students say that growing up without your mom or dad in the picture changes your whole outlook on life. Researchers found that children are hurt when their parents do not tell them the truth about things. When parents do not keep their child updated on things that are going on in the house, this could make the child feel like they are not respected. In the GordonPoll Youth Survey, the children say they just need to know that the divorce was not their fault. A Parental alienation is the creation of one relationship between a child and one parent, to the exclusion of the other parent typical indicator of this would be a child who does not wish to have contact with the target parent and expresses negative feelings towards that parent with no real reason why. There are four forms of parental alienation: mild, moderate, overt, and severe. Mild alienation occurs when a child feels significant discomfort

Changes to family circumstances can have a profound effect on children. Separation or Divorce can leave the child with a sense of bereavement, like they have lost one of their parents. They may feel angry or confused and worried about what will happen to them in the future. They may also feel that they are in some way to blame for the family breakdown so carry a burden of guilt. These negative emotions may lead to a lack of concentration at school, or exhibits themselves as withdrawn or aggressive behaviours.

Emotional: Emotional child abuse is a form of behaviour that effects a child’s emotional development and sense of wellbeing. Signs of emotional abuse can vary by age and even gender. Children suffering form emotional mistreatment can become overly aggressive or extremely withdrawn, they may even show signs of both. The signs of emotional abuse can be hard to detect and even harder to link, as a direct cause, to verbal and psychological maltreatment. Some typical characteristics of children suffering emotional abuse may include, low self-confidence, becoming detached and finding it difficult to form relationships, the child maybe become aggressive towards others and may refrain form making eye contact when being spoken to or interacting with others. In older children alcohol or drug abuse can be an indicator of emotional abuse.

Children can also experience grief, due to the loss of relationship with their natural parents. When a child experiences a change in their environment they are faced with emotional and psychological challenges. Many children show signs of depression, withdrawal and even aggression. (Chipungu, S) Attachment disorders in some children may cause disturbance of sleep, hoarding food, excessive eating, self-stimulation and failure to thrive.

When a child is removed from their home at a young age, the consequences can be more severe. During the ages three and four it is not good for a child to be moved but if they do get moved it is good to have a strong bond with their caregivers. If they get moved repeatedly, it makes their attachment issues more sever. Attachment issues create the following troubles such as; poor eye contact, antisocial, problems with learning and lack of physical affection. Theses are not abnormal for a child with theses issues(“Attachment”). There are two different types of attachment issues and they are the one that babies have which is insecure attachment and for older children it is also called Reactive Attachment Disorder. An infant with this disorder may not smile , or coo or make any sounds , or even does not reach out for you to hold them , they may also reject your affection like trying to soothe

Oaklander (2007) recognizes the need for children to make good use of the contact functions labelled as looking, listening, smelling, tasting, expressing feelings, thoughts, ideas, curiosity, touching, moving, among others. These contact functions are the same modalities that make up one’s self, as the children who get emotionally disturbed tend to isolate themselves in some way, restricting the body, anaesthetizing their senses, closing down their minds and blocking their emotions (Oaklander, 2007). When this happens, a child’s healthful development is adversely affected, and their problems get further exacerbated. Their self gets inhibited, and they cannot make good contact.

A once bright and chatty child may become withdrawn and shy away from adult attention. The child maybe showing signs of aggressive behaviour and/or exhibiting signs of self harm. Abuse can affect a child from infancy through to adolescence and then into adulthood. It can set back a child's physical development, such as a tense mealtime can affect the child’s ability to eat.

Emotional abuse is the continuous maltreatment of a child's emotional state, this can be through psychological abuse that can effect the child’s health and development. Emotional abuse can also be through deliberately humiliating a child, ignoring, scaring and isolating a child. Emotional abuse can be hard to see in a child as changes in a child’s behaviour is normal as they grow and develop. However some signs to look out for are having a lack of confidence and being

These feelings of inadequacy can cause parents to unconsciously withdraw fromtheir children, which can lead the child to feel rejected and result in an insecure attachment style.

The core-concept of an individual is largely influenced by one’s ability to regulate internal emotional states and one’s behavioral reactions to external stress. Children who experience trauma have difficulty managing their emotional states thus leading to poor perceptions of themselves. A distorted sense of self can potentially lead to loss of autobiographical memories, poor body image, and disturbances in sense of separateness in which the person may appear detached and distant (Carr, 2012). It may also lead to difficulty with impulse control which includes aggression

Trauma occurs when a child has experienced an event that threatens or causes harm to her emotional and physical well-being. Events can include war, terrorism, natural disasters, but the most common and harmful to a child’s psychosocial well-being are those such as domestic violence, neglect, physical and sexual abuse, maltreatment, and witnessing a traumatic event. While some children may experience a traumatic event and go on to develop normally, many children have long lasting implications into adulthood.

There is also emotional neglect of the child and its very irritating for them and it is very hurtful to the child’s feeling. Ward (2010) stated that “emotional neglect is any attitude, behavior, or failure to act that interferes with a child's mental health or social development”. As Gardner (2012) claimed that, by keeping the child feelings always under pressure, a parent is creating the fearing process by preventing the child need to interact with other and not showing the positive feelings to the child and blaming the child about every step done it is destroying the emotions and feelings of the child.

There was an experiment called “The Strange Situation” which studied children when their mothers left them in a room with a stranger, then returned. Researchers studied the reaction when mother both left and returned. A securely attached child would either go to their parent for comfort or greet her with a smile, fully content with what they were doing (Steinberg). An insecurely attached child would want to be picked up but did not feel comforted by it and they could kick or push their mother away (Steinberg). An indifferent child could ignore their mother when they return (Steinberg).