Can Women Have It All Essay

There is a huge debate going on today about gender. Society believes you’re a boy if you like blue, and like to play sports and go hunting; and you’re a girl if you like pink and have long hair and pig tails and play with Barbie dolls. Society has forced us to choose between the two. I believe that both women and men can both have it all. As Dorment says, ‘competing work life balance and home as much as women’. (Dorment 697) I believe in this article Richard Dorment, has argued his opinion very well, I think both men and woman equally need to be involved in housework as well as taking care of the children. In today’s world were judging who were going to be even before were born. Throughout this article Dorment effectively convinces his audience that men and women should be equal by using statistics and emotional stories, Dorment uses personal stories and extensive research to make readers believe in his credibility, and lastly Dorment employs the rhetorical appeals of pathos and ethos effectively.

Throughout history, women have been groomed to be the best they can domestically. To place them in the man’s position of being the sole provider of the family seems irrational at best. Although the natural gender roles may be overpowering during the start of having a family, through time duties between husband and wife, regarding domestic life, tend to balance out once financial security is established. Like many major changes, it starts out bumpy but eventually a solution is found and both husband and wife find their “happy-medium.”

In the essay “Why Men Still Can’t Have It All” by Richard Dorment, the topic of equality in the genders is explored. This topic includes various aspects of the lives of men and women, including work in and out of the home. Dorment responds to other opinions and viewpoints and explains why “no one can have it all.” He brings up many convincing arguments that show why the feminist push for equals rights for women is not producing the outcome that people want it to have. I agree with what much of Dorment is saying in this essay, and the following paragraphs will explain Dorment’s argument.

Scholars have researched on how to integrate gender within the main organizing constructs of social life. One social realm where scholars have vastly research is family structure. The family institution has encountered much gender problem issue, starting with "who does the housework". During this period of time, where women are gaining more civil freedom in society, there has still been a struggler for equality within society and family spheres. I investigated how gender role is significant within the family institutional context, especially in the division of labor in household. The second shift, which is used by Hochschild, "borrowed from the industrial life" is an "idea that homemaking was a shift", it is a second shift because the first shift is labor force." Moreover, the idea of the "devotion to family scheme" is a culture model that defines marriage and motherhood as a women's primary vocation. Therefore with these two notions on the family roles, the main driving question of this research is how do urban employed married couples with children divide the housework.

On the other hand, when both partners share the breadwinner role men are more likely to increase their core housework tasks in companion to men in the ‘new traditional’ and male-breadwinner families. Consequently, many studies found that gender attitudes are still primary indicators of who does housework, thus women still do two-thirds of housework where men do two-thirds of paid work. It is noticed that there have been significant changes for women over the last 6 decades to participate in the labour force, yet there was hardly any change to the division of core household work between men and women.

Many people have different perspectives about who can have it all. In “Why Women Still Can’t Have It All,” Anne-Marie Slaughter makes a point in her essay which is that you cannot have it all. However, in “Why Men Still Can’t Have It All,” Richard Dorment responds to her essay with a different opinion, and he makes arguments to prove his opinion about this topic. To understand his opinion, we are going to look at his points, how did he make the points, and my personal opinion on his argument.

Women for years have been automatically given the role of the domestic housewife, where their only job is to cook, clean, and take care of the children. Men have usually taken the primary responsibility for economic support and contact with the rest of society, while women have traditionally taken the role of providing love, nurturing, emotional support, and maintenance of the home. However, in today’s society women over the age of sixteen work outside of the home, and there are more single parent households that are headed by women than at any other time in the history of the United States (Thompson 301.)

In addition to women becoming a housewife there has been a “direct denunciation”(Doc B Sheg) because they are becoming disrespectful towards their husbands. This is because with them learning about earning their rights they tend to fight for themselves, which just ruins the mindset of how good it is to be a housewife. When the “more fortunate women”(Doc B Sheg) help with the “round of toil”(Doc B Sheg) women they feel as though it will bring them “respect and consideration which form the basis upon, which we more fortunate women build our lives.” (Doc B Sheg) Within this need to become grateful for having such an easy life to the point that they become lazy, all of the other women that need to actually work to make a living can clearly see that it is not as luxurious to have certain rights because then that requires harder

Whether it is the past or the present, there have always been gender roles in society. In most homes, it is the woman’s responsibility to take care of the house. This includes cleaning, meal preparations, raising and taking care of the children as well as the husband. Compared to the men who take care of the more physical activities, such as yard work. It was known throughout many years that it was a woman’s responsibility to stay in the house while the man would go out and look for work to provide money for his family. Although the intensity of gender roles has changed, it still exists.

Women’s role within the household has changed considerably over a period of time. In the later days in the United States women were to attend to the children and to the house and not do much more than that. Children are now being raised by stay at home dads instead of the stereotypical stay at home moms. According to Gardner, "Real-life families have changed considerably since 'Mr. Mom ' appeared, with more men sharing child-rearing and household chores." (Gardner 2010) This is occurring because women’s jobs are no longer labeled as being just for women. Men have gotten a lot of criticism for being stay at

Before, women were considered housewives who were in charge of taking care of children and cleaning the house while their husbands worked jobs to sustain their families. As years passed, many things have changed throughout society, including the responsibilities of both men and women. Today, women work and provide for their own family as much as men do. Throughout the years, many roles have changed, but one issue remains which is that most men do not consider house cleaning as a mandatory task. Gross believes that men lack the emotional and physical drive to do a “woman’s job”. Although today more men are contributing to their home chores, there are still many men who leave this to their wives or any woman in general. Men cook and watch for their children, but they do not bother with house cleaning. Most men feel like a clean house is not needed to have a healthy, safe environment for the family, which Gross does not agree with.

Mohanty also stated how, in India, women’s “definition as housewives make possible the definition of men as 'breadwinners'” (13). We see that in Nasarpur, India the woman’s role in society is somewhat restricted. Her restricted role of being a housewife increased the man’s status in that society as the sole provider and the hardest worker. Although this concept of men’s and women’s roles in society is not totally true in America, I still think it occurs in our society. I feel that most men accept women working outside the home in America because it has become a norm over the years, but I do not think all men are comfortable with the idea of women working outside the home. The fact that women are no longer just simply housewives makes some men feel as if they are being robbed of part of their masculinity, which is tied to being a sole provider for a family. Women have proven during the past few decades that they can be housewives and manage to handle an outside job as well. I think this proves that women are strong dependable laborers. A good worker is one who can handle multiple tasks such as managing a household and having an outside job.

Robert Dorment’s summary from his article talked about that women always complained about men did wrong but men who worked so hard for their family and work-life balance. Richard used that word “castigate” for men that means women scold men, but they did not realize men worked so hard. Other quote about the castigation of men, “…person whose husband, by her own admission, sacrificed much in his own academic career to do other heavy lifting with their children, all so she could pursue her dream job and then complain about it, bitterly, in the pages of a national magazine” (Dorment 708). Anne-Marie Slaughter explained that women who get promotion from other positions that they realized they do not have spent time with their family and some women who leave their jobs because of their family reasons. The quote said, “It is unthinkable that an official would actually step down to spend time with his or her family that this must be a cover for something else” (Slaughter 682). Third article called Women, work and work/life balance: Research roundup talked about the wage inequality and unequal responsibilities between men and women. Women have more family responsibilities than men do because some women are staying at home while taking care of their kids. Last article, Work-Life Balance – An integrated Approach: The case for joint and several responsibility talked about the

The initial answer is that women today can not simply give up their roles of motherhood and wife because they have gained ground outside the home. Household and child care responsibilities still apply to women even if she wakes early to start her 9am job and doesn't return home until 5pm. Yet, this answer is inherently problematic. The responsibilities discussed above should not mean an inequitable amount of time spent on her children and family as compared to her husband. House-hold responsibilities should not result in less sleep than her husband and having less time

This economic contribution, argues Baxter (2002:406) essentially translates to an increase in bargaining power within the household, which is actualised by decreased involvement in domestic duties. Curtis (1986:180, as cited in Brines, 1994:657) suggests that the power differential occurs because women are expecting an ‘unspecified benefaction’ to be decided, and provided by their partners at a future date. This use of housework as a ‘social exchange’ (Brines, 1994:657) is problematic, in that the amount of accumulated housework performed by a wife outweighs the monetary benefit provided to the household by the husband (Sullivan, 2000:442).