When I was a child I was fortunate to experience very little loss. The first loss that I did experience was at the age of 9, when my father was transfered within his company and our family moved several hours away to a new town. According to Dr. Wright, this is one of four types of loss that are experienced in childhood, with the other three being death of grandparents, death of pets, and divorce of parents (Wright, 2006). Within a little more than a year of that move I experienced another loss, the death of my great-grandmother (on my eleventh birthday of all days! We weren't considerably close, but she was one of my favorite relatives. She always had hugs and a smile for me). Shortly after the loss of my great-grandmother, my first pet (a hamster) died. …show more content…
For the move, my parents explained that we wouldn't be terribly far, that we would still come back to our home town and visit, and that we (my siblings and I) would have the chance to make new friends at our new school. When my great-grandmother passed, it was not suddenly - she had been diagnosed with lung cancer prior to her death, which gave my mother time to explain to us what was going on, and that she would die. When she did pass, my parents gave us room to cry, held us close, and attempted to comfort us as best they could with words about how it would be less upsetting with time. When my hamster died I believe I felt the most grief, though looking back I would assume that all of the loss I had experienced prior, as well as the loss of my pet, led me to such extreme feelings of hurt over this loss. I remember my father telling me that my heart of gold was kind and tender, and that was why I felt things so deeply. I've carried that statement with me my entire
This time around it was more unconceivable and included all the emotions that come with losing a loved one. I was only 16 years old trying to make it through high school. This is a time when losing a friend doesn't even seem feasible. A good friend of mine died of a drug overdose. I was in denial when I was told of Chino's death. Everything seemed so unreal as if someone was playing a cruel joke on me. His death affected me and the way I looked at friendship. It helped me cherish those around me because I never knew when I would lose someone else who meant so much to me again. A lot of our friends attended his funeral and there were a lot of tears shed. The fear of losing a close friend soon came again. In 2006 at the age of twenty-five one of my first love died due to a road rage incident. The vehicle he was riding in went over a bridge and landed in a body of water. The other two individuals he was with made it out alive, but he lost his fight shortly after arriving to the hospital. I felt so much anger, my emotions were everywhere and unpredictable. Due to some issues we had not talked for a while but had recently reconnected. There were a lot of unspoken words that we never had the chance to share and for the longest time I lived with so much regret for the way things stood between us at his time of death. It has
My maternal aunt gathered us together and we all sat on the couch. She turned to my mother and told us she had cancer. I looked at my aunt and I did not know what to say or how to respond. Three months later, my father received a phone call from his sister telling him that my pregnant cousin, Elizabeth, was diagnosed with leukemia and had to give birth to her premature baby. She and I grew up in the same house in Arizona and what hurt me the most was not being able to be with her during this difficult time. When we went to visit her in Arizona, my dad told us before entering the hospital room that he did not want us to cry in front of her. I was scared to enter. I did not know what to say to her but I knew I had to be strong. We stayed there for the holiday season but we never celebrated the holidays, that was too
One of the hardest things for me is moving to Georgia. I was going to miss my grandma, dad, and my sisters. The trip was long and hot it. There were five of us in the car plus a We were almost out of gas and there wasn’t a gas station for miles I was terrified then we finally made it. We were living
My grandmother, who is the mother of my mom, passed away due to heart failure at the age of 87. Since I was 6 or 7 she had been living in our house. The reason for that was, my grandfather, that I was named after passed away a year before I was born, so she was alone, and she was starting to get old. Since she lived with us for so many years, she had been a very important figure in my life. I can honestly say that she was like a 3rd parent for me, and losing her, made me fell horrible and helpless. I witnessed how real death is because of her passing. Combined with puberty, my grief caused me to become depressed for a long time. As I’m looking back it sounds really extreme, but there were some days that I did not even leave the bed thinking that there was no point to our existence. Thanks to some psychological counselling however, I was able to overcome that mental
When I was 13 I lost a very close family friend, that day is one I will never forget. He was like a second father to me; he taught me how to ride my bike, how to do a backflip on the trampoline, how to bake, all things I still use constantly. He had two kids, a boy and a girl, both which were older than me. My
Something in my stomach was telling me I would not see him. I did not tell anyone this though just in case I was wrong. But I was right I always have a way of knowing these things. He heard a knock on the door. A feeling of relief washed over everyone except me. The person at the door was the only policeman in town and Frank the town leader. My mom could not keep it together. It is a hard sight to see when your mom is sad. The person you look up to when you are a kid is crying. That can mess a 6 year old kid up. The time that would take place next went from 0 to 100 so fast. We cremated my dad's body and moved. My mom picked texas because it had good schools. We did not have any family though and sometimes I felt as if that was a bad decision. My mother would not tell me how my dad died until I was 16. Not living without a dad can be hard. When it is at the crucial age of 6. You need a good role model. My brother became my dad if he liked it or not. Everything that happened in my life seemed like a blurr. The fact my dad was dead never really hit me. But it hit me so hard and so fast. It was like a brick wall. I started almost failing my classes, sleeping all the time, eating a lot, not exercising, moping all the time. I still suffer from it today. Back then though I wanted to die. But it is so much better. I learned that I held my mom accountable and my dad for
One day I woke up to find that my mom was gone and that made me feel bad. So I went to live with my grandma and I had to adjust to a whole new
Sometimes I wish I was an only child. I have an irritating brother. Ross is my 18 year old brother. Our birthday’s are 1 day apart and I dislike it. When we were younger we always had our parties together. I hated having them together and his friends. My Grandma is psychotic! After my Grandpa passed away we realized she doesn’t know how to do anything. She doesn't even remember my name. My Grandma always gets Ross’ girlfriend’s name right, but never remembers mine. My family calls me the “Forgotten Child” because of my Grandma and great-aunt, Phi-Phi. I love spending time with friends and family! My friends and I love to travel together. Our recent trip we took was to Chicago. We went for a concert and got stuck standing in the rain for 2
The toughest time I went through was saying goodbye to my friends and moving to Minnesota when I was in 2nd grade. When we pack up our house and left for Minnesota I thought I wouldn’t ever see them again. It turns out a few months later we went back to Illinois and we got to visit my school and friends again. It was After getting to spend time bitter sweet. I felt excited and very sad at
My role as a Youth Ambassador for Child Bereavement UK has taught me that I am not limited by the adversity of my own bereavement, instead reforming my grief into a positive experience and empowering myself to exercise resilience. My role in the charity includes speaking with benefactors to raise money and advising different sectors of the public on how best to help bereaved children. Over the past year I have been involved in a BBC documentary discussing bereavement and a national campaign to encourage unfiltered discussions regarding grief. Alongside this, I have worked closely with the media to raise awareness of the charity; as such this role has helped me to develop important public speaking skills. This role has taught me responsibility
The effects of IVP do not have to be permeant, if they are recognized and treated correctly, there are ways to mediate any damage that has been done. We know that that our brains are able to repair itself as long as we receive the correct treatments. We know that therapy today is able to physically impact the structure of our brains, allowing new pathways to be built, which in turn allows the brain begin to function the way is supposed to. Recognizing the symptoms of trauma as early as possible is imperative to the recovery of the traumatized person (Bedenoch, 2008, pp 27-29).
Last semester, my grandmother had an accident, rendering her unable to walk. As a result, my mother had to leave immediately for India to care for her. Soon after her return, my father left for India due to the passing of my grandfather. This was a very emotional period for our family, and keeping everything together was challenging.
Nader and Salloum (2011) made clear that, at different ages, children differ in their understanding of the universality, inevitability, unpredictability, irreversibility, and causality of death. They believed, despite the increasing understanding with age of the physical aspects of death, a child may simultaneously hold more than one idea about the characteristics of death. However, factors that complete the determining nature of childhood grieving across different age groups may be a difficult task for a number of reasons including their environment in means of the support they have available, the child’s nature in terms of their personality, genetics, and gender, coping skills and previous experiences, the developmental age, grieving style, whether or not therapy was received, and the relationship to the deceased (Nader & Salloum, 2011). Crenshaw (2005) found that according to our current understanding of childhood traumatic grief and normal grief, thoughts and images of a traumatic nature are so terrifying, horrific, and anxiety provoking that they cause the child to avoid and shut out these thoughts and images that would be comforting reminders of the person who died. The distressing and intrusive images, reminders, and thoughts of the traumatic circumstances of the death, along with the physiological hyper-arousal associated with such re-experiencing, prevent the child from proceeding in a healthy way with the grieving process (Crenshaw, 2005). McClatchy, Vonk, and
The feeling of losing someone you love is indescribable. It came upon my family so suddenly, not a day goes by that I don’t think about my grandma. I tell myself everyday not to take life for granted, and after 2 years I am still learning.
Childhood trauma contributes to the development of disorders later in life. Several psychological disorders may be caused by childhood trauma. These disorders may include: post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), depression, addiction, borderline personality disorder, and dissociative identity disorder.