Conflict: Growing Up In A Military Family

Conflict, according to Wilmot & Hocker (2011), is defined as an expressed struggle between at least two interdependent parties who perceive incompatible goals, scarce resources, and interference from others in achieving their goals.

Conflicts can be regarded as a strong disagreement between people, groups etc. Or as differences that prevent agreement. Conflicts are not just about power and resources but are rooted in the denial of human needs such as identity, security, respect and recognition. (Barbara A, 2007).

Conflict is defined as “a disagreement between people, groups, etc.” in the Merriam Webster Dictionary, but there is more to it than just the definition by book. It plays a big role in our lives and can contribute to personal change and growth. In To Kill A Mockingbird, by Harper Lee, it shows how conflict can not only change one person but contribute to the growth of an entire town. In the deep south, there were many factors that could have made a difference in how the conflicts played out that stood out, but some of their impacts were more significant than others. In To Kill A Mockingbird, impact of history, race relationships, and loyalty are the most influential factors in the development of conflict.

Some children in a military family had to move a lot, and leading them to say good-bye to all the experiences with their friends. This is a rather sad for the lot of them. I know it was hard for me losing great friends that you grew up with. That’s how my life was, I moved 5 times until my parents left the military and found a new place to live. When ever I moved to a new place to live I had to make new friends, find new things to do, and adjust to the school.

During the National Leadership Summit on Military Families, held in 2009, Mrs. Gail McGinn, the Deputy Under Secretary of Defense for Personnel and Readiness, delivered the keynote address for the Summit. In Mrs. McGinn’s keynote speech, she acknowledged the progress that has been made in supporting military families since the 1980’s while emphasizing the facts surrounding the issues of the current conflicts in Iraq and Afghanistan. Mrs. McGinn stated that “the conflicts in Iraq and Afghanistan are placing military families under more strain than at any time in the era of the All-Volunteer Force, and more needs to be done to ensure that programs and policies are able to meet current challenges” (Booth, Segal, & Place, 2009). During that Summit the top five challenges identified were; the challenges of the deployment cycle, the psychological health of military families, the access to services and consistency of

Meet Joyce, my next door neighbor, and Madison's "adopted" grandmother. The story of how Joyce and Madison became close is one I have shared before, but will gladly share again. As a military family, we're almost always away from our family and friends. I personally cannot tell you how many mother's day I've missed with my very own mother, and also with my family. I was based at Fort Carson, in Colorado when Madison was born, and my family, except for my husband and kids, were all in another state. Just like most military family, being in a strange state with no-one close by can become daunting. Most of us have learned to live with it over the years, and we tend to adopt those that are close to us. Other military families become our families,

Growing up in a military family is difficult in itself; however, it is even more difficult and discouraging when you are too young to thoroughly understand what is going on. My dad had been enlisted in the United States Army since 1989, long before I was even thought of. Growing up, I realized that there were times when my dad wasn’t home, but he always returned before dinnertime, so it seemed that things were okay.

Growing up in a military family is a tough way of life. My father is in the military, which has forced my family and me to move every two to three years. He has also deployed to Iraq and Afghanistan, occasionally, for over a year. The media has highlighted the hardships and sacrifices of members of the military, which I do not want to diminish. What the media has not highlighted is the sacrifices that the family members undertake, either when the military member deploys or is faced with yet another move. All the tribulations and sacrifices notwithstanding, I have been able to parlay them into making me a stronger person.

Since birth I have been part of a military family, that means not having my father around and moving around way too much for one kid to handle.

Belonging to a military family has granted me the opportunity to travel around the world and interconnect with diverse people. If the truth is told, all such experiences have contributed greatly in shaping my life in a myriad of remarkable ways. Having been born into an American father and Hong Konger mother, I myself belong to a mixed culture with a diverse ethnic background; learning about various cultures and languages from the U.S., Hong Kong, and Japan – my birth place. This exposure to cultural differentiation from an early age has made communication skills to be one of my greatest strengths. It is very beneficial for me since I developed the ability to engage with diverse people and initiate conversations easily even if we had just become familiar with each other. I am also very fortunate to be able to travel to different countries frequently.

I was born into a military family. Both of my parents are affiliated with the Army. My mom is a retired veteran who served 22 years, while my dad is still an active duty Sergeant Major quickly approaching his 28th year. I was born in El Paso, Texas, however, I can’t say I grew up there because we ended up leaving two months after I was born. I have moved 10 times and lived in different countries during the last 17 years. Due to the fact that I was always moving, I never had long term friendships. It was really hard, especially as a child, to make friends. I always like the odd person because not all public schools I attended were familiar with military families. That always led to a feeling of uncomfortableness. It was hard to understand that people are not used to a new face in school. I learned from my parents at a young age that I should always show respect, kindness, and honesty to others. So even though I felt out of place, I still remained humble and put forth my best efforts.

When people think about growing up in a Military family, they may think about privilege or regimentation or discipline. They may consider how difficult moving all the time is, or how it must be terrible to not have your parents around all the time. They may even understand what it’s like to sacrifice the presence of your parent for wartime duty, or the pressure that puts on the families involved. It’s true, all of that is there, it comes with the uniform and rank. But there are benefits to being a Military kid, too.

Conflicts are “when one party perceives another party has negatively affected or is about to negatively affect something the first party cares about.

Being a military brat is a culture in itself- a bizarre, complicated culture- but it is one. Growing up, I did not exactly have stability, but I always had stories to tell. My mother is an active duty air force doctor and one of the main requirements is being prepared to move your family every two to three years. The frequent moves that peppered my childhood truly shaped my personality- I adopted the traits that a child needs to survive that kind of lifestyle. I learned to be incredibly adaptable and flexible, as well as open to diverse cultures and ways of life that I encountered both while in other countries, and while on base, interacting with children with the same military background but also totally different experiences to mine. Of course,

The term conflict referred to perceived incompatible differenced resulting in some form of interference or opposition. Conflict is a natural part of organizational life because the goals between mangers and workers are often incompatible. If people perceive that differences exist then conflict state exists. Conflict is not exists between individual only, it also can exist between departments and divisions that compete for resources or even because of overlapped authority.