Controlling Relationships

788 WordsOct 8, 19994 Pages
Controlling Relationships Being engaged to a controlling person sometimes causes you to lose control in every aspect of your life. Passive people like myself usually find controlling partners. Controlling people like my ex-fiancé usually find passive partners. We are "perfect" for each other. Being passive, I'm quite happy to be left alone. I sometimes don't have much to say, and I have to admit I sometimes can seem to be deaf when you try to discuss problems with me. While on the other hand a controlling person makes constant demands on their partners. They have much to say, and they can act like they think they've been elected to tell everyone else how to live their lives. They are seldom content, and they seem to resent…show more content…
At a deeper level are the beliefs you hold about relationships in general, about this specific relationship, and about yourself. These beliefs may take the form of learned social messages such as "You are a failure if you end a relationship," "Being alone is terrible," "I'll never find anyone else," "I'm not attractive or interesting enough," or "If I work hard enough I should be able to save this relationship." To end this never ending cycle of a controlling relationship make your recovery the first priority in your life. Become selfish by focusing on getting your own needs met more effectively. Learn to stop being managed or controlled by others; by being more focused on your own needs, you will no longer need to seek security by trying to make others change. Find a support group of friends who understand and will listen. Forget the broken engagement and share with others what you have experienced and learned, even if it is your Critical Thinking Essay
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