David Oragui Communication

After reading the article on Close Relationships Sometimes Mask Poor Communication it hit home for me. Me and my fiancé have poor communication skills. We have been together for the past eight years, and we still have a problem commutating. He likes to take over the conversation, or cut me off when we are talking. He said that is because he has short term memory, and that I am long winded, and he has short term memory , and needs to get respond to what I am saying or he will forget if he lets me finish. I on the other hand feel’s like he is talking at me not to me, or he is

Paying more attention to those things, and putting them above communicating with or hanging out with the people in your life, will guarantee that you hurt your relationship in the long run.

Being in a relationship you should be able to understand and make adjustments to certain situations like time spent together and budgeting for bills. I gave this tip to my sister’s relationship, because she should love him the way she want to be love. If you want someone to care about your dreams and concerns of life you have to do the same. My sister started to think about her boyfriend and he thought about her, when he went shopping he pick up somethings for her as well. After using my third tip, my sister and her boyfriend, focuses more on each other, they help each other out in ways I didn’t think they would be able too, for example, shopping, investing into their futures together by saving more money, being aware of decisions they make in life and taking in consideration on how would that make the other partner feel within the relationship. The fourth tip would be one we learn in class, “never attack an Achilles’ heel”. For example if your partner has confessed to you that his cruel high-school classmates nicknamed him “the hairy ape,” and if, in adulthood, he still has fears about being furrier than most, you can--when you are furious--call him every name in the book, but you can’t call him that one. This one relates more to arguments; it’s also known as hitting below the belt. We all have flaws and things that happen or we did through the years but it’s not fair to reopen a wound if that wound has healed. In my sister’s relationship, they both

This is not always good. My husband and I struggle with communication a lot. It is sometimes not for lack of trying but just not speaking up when something bothers us or just not saying it all. One example I can think of is for the longest time I would always do my daughters bed time routine and then have to come downstairs and pickup her toys and tidy up the house. I would just get so mad that he would just sit there on his computer and not offer to help or do it without me asking. I was so exhausted after a long day that I lost it one night and had an argument with him about it. I said some not so nice things and it was because I couldn’t express my emotions correctly. I didn’t speak up first and just ask for help. I just assumed he should do it. However, after our argument he now helps clean up the majority of the

“What greater thing is there for two human souls than to feel that they are joined. to strengthen each other... to be at one with each other in silent unspeakable memories” (George, Eliot). One of the most important characteristics in relationships today is communication. Communicating must be built on trust, listening, and understanding. The more you can learn to communicate with someone, the better your relationship will be. Although there will be different levels of communication depending on the relationship of the person you are dealing with, nether the less it is important that the pathway to communication is open and effective.

In an intimate relationship it is evident that there is a substantial difference between the man’s communication skill versus the woman’s. I became aware of this throughout my experience of Dating . My boyfriend and I have been together for a year and a half. We try to believe that we understand where we are both coming from but I believe our gender differences restricts us from completely understanding . He is very blunt , straight to the point and does not like arguing. I like to talk things through and have a structured conversation where we address all the points . When I’m upset I am not straight forward , sometimes I don't even feel like talking to him. These characteristic often clash because he excepts me to be frank and address

While      your mate has the floor, it is your job to genuinely understand and emphasize with      the feelings behind the words that you hear. If an individual doesn’t listen to what      someone is saying, it may result into him/her reacting defensively. This is a      common mistake couples make in relationships.(Gottman,51)

To me personally I like to have communication between me and my girl friend and the only way our relationship has worked is through good communication. If we didn’t

One thing that I forgot about that a lot of people do not really think about is the positive effects that could come out of a conflict. We just get so used to assuming the negative is the only way that we forget about the second principle of conflict, conflict can have negative and positive effects. (Devito,2010-2011) Yes, a conflict can hurt a relationship, but in the end it is helping a relationship whether we see it or not. Had I not been afraid of the negative effects of having an argument with “Aaron” and telling him how I felt about the way he communicated with me the outcome of my fear would not have occurred to the escalation that it did, but my fear did effect the outcome, and even though there was a chance of us terminating the relationship we did not go through with it and the positive effect occurred. We had a better communication skill in our relationship. A conflict can either make or break any relationship, for me it made my relationship ten times better.

The assumption of the general public tends to be centered around the fact that relationships are not easy. Over many years, the field of Communication has proven this to be both true and false. Although interpersonal communication through relationships is not the easiest thing in the world, it should not have to be the hardest, either. Much like the general public, I have found myself bound by the constraints of the "hard relationship" faux pas. Now what this means can be based on several perspectives as well as extenuating circumstances; we all participate in relationships, but no two relationships are the same. Incidentally, a lot of miscommunication occurs between loved ones in these situations and not seeing eye to eye causes the feelings that create the illusion of a tough relationship. It is easy to talk about relationships as a whole, but that is another misstep that so many of us are guilty of. Looking at the big picture may be one of the main causes of miscommunication, rather than focusing in on each problem one at a time. To tackle what I feel has become one of the biggest problems in one of my relationships, I took a magnifying glass and started all the way at the beginning.

I remember one time, my wife and I gotten into a big argument, that both of us did not want to speak to each and we gave each other the silent treatment. Worthington (2005) states the importance for communication in marriage, “People communicate to meet their needs. High on the list of needs is giving and receiving love. It is precisely that need in which troubled couples are deficient.” According to Gary Chapman (2008) one of the reason why married couples do not communicate is because resentment, “Often it is unmet needs in the marital relationship that have stimulated resentment in the spirit of the silent spouse…these are the inner emotional reasons why he or she is not talking.” The five basic needs Chapman mentions that every person has are love, freedom, significance, recreation, and peace with God. If the spouse is intruding in any way for their spouse to have an unmet need in the marital relationship, the spouse ends up being uncommunicative. This is important because if the spouse that feels that the resentment can grow to something more. Dr. Norman Wise executive director and counselor for Living Water Christian Counseling has mention many times ins his seminars that the emotions you have towards someone is due to the story you have told yourself about that person. The danger of keeping an unresolved resentment can lead to bigger issues. Worthington (2205) state, “Negative thoughts feed on themselves, attracting other negative thoughts like a feeding frenzy of

Women and men are different in many ways. They see the world through completely different perspectives which leads to differences in communication. Women communicate with their partners not only because they want to talk to someone, but they also use conversation as an opportunity to bond intimately with their partner, explore and share thoughts, and express her anxieties. Men on the other hand believe that all conversations should have a clear purpose, he doesn't need or want to hear the small details, he listens passively not patiently, he wants to tackle the problem head on otherwise he loses interest in what the women is trying to convey. Men and women want to keep each other happy but with the differences in both sexes it could be easy to end up in a frustrated state of conflict and resentment if they don’t understand each other since the beginning of the relationship. Effective gender communication is essential to every thriving relationship; however, lack of communication and problem resolve could result in relationship conflict and unsatisfied partners if it is not addressed or acknowledged.

We have experienced difficult conversations throughout our relationship in large part due to the biggest weaknesses in our relational communication. These weaknesses include the difficulty of defining/discussing where we are in our relationship and balancing the time that we spend together and apart. It has become more difficult to discuss or

Interpersonal relationship plays a very important role. Exchanging words and information with one another will help better a relationship. Having a whole lot of buildup can result in constant arguments, not letting one another know if there’s a problem or letting them know how they feel about a certain thing. That’s where the trust and honesty start to deteriorate, and when communication goes wrong. Listening to one another and letting each other know how they feel will prevent that from deteriorating, and that’s when trust and honesty start to come back up. If there’s a continuation there’s no way of the relationship growing. Trust and honesty must be mutual with each other to sustain the relationship. When the relationship starts to deteriorate there are clear signs of when it does. One will get bored with the other, start drifting away, dissatisfied, not happy, etc. You will notice all the common signs, basically how things use to be are not in action anymore. Sometimes you can or cannot save a relationship, depending on both if they are willing to work it out and focus on the main concern. As in the relationship it cannot just go one way it must go both, there must be two people involved not just one, if it’s only going one way the feeling isn’t mutual and there’s not much you can do about it if the other person isn’t willing to work on the relationship. That situation leads to ending the relationship. Just remember it take two to make a relationship work. It’s not

Now in days, people don 't realize that communication is a big role in a relationship. Without talking to your partner about for example, how you feel about them, disagreeing with them, your problems then things are going to affect your relationship later on. Some people have never been very open to others in their life. But to be in a relationship is to take a step toward opening up your life and opening up yourself. Little lies turn into big lies. Hiding your