Humorous Wedding Day

Good evening Ladies and Gentlemen - I would like to start by thanking Frank on behalf of the bridesmaids for his kind comments and echo the fact that they look wonderful and performed their role fantastically well, despite the inevitable and healthy rivalry that can sometimes occur. In fact, just before the service I overheard a furious sisterly argument about who was going to be first to dance with the best man. Understandable, I thought - until I got closer and heard them saying, 'You!', 'no, you!'

Bride's Magazine has released The Number, and it's big enough to send loan officers cartwheeling down the street yelling yahoo.

Hello pretty people! :) How are you all? I was very busy last week. There was a wedding at our family friend's house so we had to attend all the functions. You guys probably know about it already since I was updating everything on my Instagram account. :P

Uninvited guests wore their beatific harlequin masks - their false beaming illuminating the darkest of tunnels. Lozenge wall-lights glinted softly like paralyzed fireflies, azure curtains gushed from the roof as though they were remorseless cataracts, and anticipation wafted through the still air; with everything etched in gilt, it was almost imperceptible that anything could go wrong that evening, but it felt almost too saccharine to be true.

“Here is you new baby boy!” Said the doctor at 7:46 P.M., April 19, 2001. Melanie Burns and Bernard Burns Jr. had their first child. They had a baby that weighed 8 lbs and 6 oz. And they name him Jonah Khalil Burns. He was born in Sinai Hospital. Oh yeah, by the way that Jonah Burns kid, is me. And I’m now 14 years old about to turn 15 in a few months. So, I know you're probably wondering “What happened in the past 14 years.” Well, let’s dive into the book of me.

Salam alaikum and good evening, everyone. I would like to thank Brother Naeem Baig and the ICNA National Committee for a phenomenal job organizing this year’s convention honoring the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) and for inviting me to speak tonight. I would also like to thank my colleagues at the Arab American Association of New York for their hard work and dedication, which allows me the opportunity to be in attendance at this indispensable conference. I am extremely honored to be here with all of you. It means a lot to me to be back in Baltimore. As some of you may know, last April I participated in the March2Justice, walking on foot with Justice League NYC and friends from across the country from New York City to Washington, D.C. to deliver a "Justice Package" of criminal justice reform legislation that will end racial profiling, demilitarize our police forces, and invest in our communities. Along the way, my fellow marchers and I stopped in this great, and at that time, troubled city and attended Sunday services at the Empowerment Temple and joined Freddie Gray protests at the Western District police station. Those were unforgettable and moving experiences that I will carry with me, always.

Once upon a time, in a little tiny cottage with only a few scrap pieces of food lived a little skinny wife. Her name was Meghan. She lived with her husband, Nick. Nick was a grumpy, young, man. Meghan did not know if Nick loved her. One night, the sky was dark, and the night was cold she heard the old creaky door slam shut! She ran out to the porch trying not to slip and fall in one of the cracks, seeing a man running away in the forest, she stepped on this tiny piece of paper saying in bold letter. “I am sorry Meg, you deserve better, Xoxo Nick” Nick was gone she thought, what was she going to without anyone to love her she cried out to the goddess of love, Aphrodite. She prayed to Aphrodite to help her find love. Months passed, Meghan was

Today we started and Broomsticks my waking the resident up and take her to the bathroom she had urinated in the toilet but had no bowel movement. Next we took her to breakfast and made her bed. Call bacon French toast with a cup of coffee for breakfast.

I walked to my window and looked at my kingdom, well not my kingdom but I was getting married then crowned queen in a month so close enough. I looked down as my father’s workers hauled hay into the stables. I then saw the highly decorated carriage with pure black horses pulling it. The carriage was complete with gold crowing and a whale painted on the side.

It was finally here. It was their wedding day and everyone was excited. The morning had been filled with the hustle and bustle of getting ready for the big day. The girls and guys had separated the night before, sleeping in different hotel rooms, since they all believed in old wedding superstitions, such as not seeing your lover before entering the church. They definitely did not want to risk the chance of getting bad luck.

I've put a bit of a speech together today, but after the previous speaker put us all to sleep I'll try to make mine a bit more interesting and entertaining. Sorry; only joking.

The first wedding that I planned was in no way a traditional wedding. Ten eager little girls

The decorated rustic barn was illuminated with happiness in laughter. I sit down by my family in the bench and wait. She walks down the aisle in the prettiest dress i’ve ever seen. He stands at the end with the happiest grin on his face.

The sun was shining and I could hear the birds singing. As I was sitting in bed listening to Darry making our breakfast which was eggs and chocolate cake of course. I am not exactly sure where soda is. He is probably with sandy getting ready for their big wedding today. Ever seens sandy's parents gave them permission to get married soda has been all sunshine and rainbows.

We all have that someone that we would do anything for, we even all have that someone, who we meet, and we know that they are the one. Deep down inside we know they could be the one but we might be too scared to look into it or admit it. Here, I’m going to tell you about my “special someone”. It starts with a simple outdoor wedding, some talking here and there, and it ends with a wonderful dance.