Difference Between Forced And Arranged Marriages

Arranged Marriages have been around since time can remember. An arranged marriage is a marital union between a man and a woman who were selected to be wedded together by a third party. Historically, arrange marriages were the main way to marry. In certain parts of the world, it is still the primary approach. There are two types of arrange marriages. The first is a traditional marriage where the children can, with strong objections, refuse to marry their soon to be spouse. In a forced marriage, the children have no say in the matter. Bread Givers shows an excellent representation of the pressures on children from their parents to be married against their will.

People believe that marriage is easy and is the key to love and happiness, but in reality marriage is harder than it looks. Everyone marries for different reasons, for good or for bad. People today don’t understand the meaning of marriage; it is more than just money and appearance. Seeing today’s world of marriage is being influenced by media shows like Jerry Springer, Judge Judy, and Murray makes you realize how society today identifies marriage different. Couples who live unmarried will be happier and have more choices than those that are married in agreement with Catherine Newman’s essay called I Do. Not.: Why I Won’t Marry in the book “Acting Out Culture: Reading and Writing “, by: James S. Miller. Catherine Newman is a writer and an author

In our society, we wouldn’t consider arranged marriages as a normal thing we are, use to consensual heterosexual serial monogamy. But in some countries, they do consider arranged marriages normal. In India, arranged marriages have been apart of the Indian culture since the fourth century and many consider it a central fabric of Indian society (Arranged Marriages, Matchmakers, and Dowries in India, 2000). Pakistan also considers arranged marriages as normal in Pakistani culture elders of the family are considered wise and they are the ones who help pick out a spouse a family member (Arranged Marriages are the Part of Pakistani Culture, 2012). Japan still practices arranged marriage but now less than ten percent of marriages are arranged compared to half a century ago when about seventy percent were arranged(Tying the Knot, 1998). In China, they have marriage markets where parents line the pathways share with other parents their clippings they have on their child, hoping to find a good match for their child (Epatko, 2015). Still, today many countries consider arranged marriages normal.

In Andrew J. Cherlin’s essay “American Marriage In Transition”, he discusses how marriage in America is evolving from the universal marriage. Cherlin’s definition of the universal marriage in his essay is the man is the breadwinner of the household and the woman is the homemaker. In the 20th century according to Cherlin, the meaning of marriage has been altered such as the changing division of labor, childbearing outside of marriage, cohabitation, gay marriage and the result of long- term cultural and material trends (1154). During the first transition of marriage, Cherlin discusses how in America, Europe, and Canada the only socially accepted way to have sexual relations with a person and to have children is to be married (1154). The second change in marriage occurred in 2000, where the median age of marriage in the United States for men is 27 and women is 25 (1155). Many young adults stayed single during this time and focused on their education and starting their careers. During the second change, the role of law increasingly changed, especially in the role of law in divorce (1155). It is proven in today’s research marriage has a different definition than what it did back in the 1950’s. Today marriage can be defined as getting married to the same gender or getting remarried to someone who already has kids. The roles in a marriage are evolving to be a little more flexible and negotiable. However, women still do a lot of the basic household chores and taking care of the

     In years past, the American Dream for most young girls’ is to grow up and be married to Prince Charming and to “Live Happily Ever After!” Although this may be expected - it is rarely fulfilled. Marriage is the legal and binding union between a man and woman. Yet when couples marry, they vow to stay by their partner’s side ‘till death do us part.’ Currently that vow seems to have little or no value in today’s society. The current statistics for survival of marriage are quite grim. The divorce rate in the United States is somewhere between 50 percent and a startling 67 percent. (KSL News) One contributing factor the growing epidemic of divorce is the parting of different family

As stated in our text, various factors can bind married couples together, such as economic interdependencies, legal, social and moral constraints, relationship, and amongst other things. In the recent years some of these factors have diminished their strengths. The modern generation sees marriage in a different perspective altogether. Individuals today feel they are stable independently, they do not need to rely on their spouse for emotional or financial support. Many are career driven and soar to conquer their dreams over settling down with a family. Such untraditional views have increased divorce rates.

There are many unique concepts in marriages in India that differ from American marriages, such as arranged marriages. According to statisticbrain.com, “88.4% of marriages in India are arranged marriages”. The idea of having families set you up with your significant other is viewed as a very odd concept to people of American culture. Many other norms and traditions generally seen in Indian weddings differ greatly from what you might see at a wedding in America. There are many differences such as the traditions before the wedding and what goes on during and after.

In “For better, for worse: Marriage means something different now,” Stephanie Coontz reveals the worldwide changes in people’s attitudes and behaviors towards marriage. According to Coontz, education and the social norms are the reasons why marriage has become nonessential. Being single and going through a divorce are more acceptable now. The motivations of marriage have turned from economic dependence into personal willingness. In fact, Coontz’s words make me wonder the true meaning of marriage. Even though the meaning has changed over times, I believed that I still hope to get married.

Marriage has been constantly changing over the past centuries. Currently, trends in marriage have adopted a new way of getting married through splitting responsibilities and work, resulting in social freedom for individuals. "The Myth of Co-Parenting,” by Hope Edelman demonstrates the difficulties of taking all the responsibilities while in “ My Problem with Her Anger,” explains the needs of having a better understanding of each other. Due to marriage changing over the last centuries, marriage couples desire individuals’ expectations and freedom to be met in marriage.

In “The State of Marriage of the 90s” the author, Sally Macdonald states that marriage has majorly changed from the sixties    . The stereotypical gender roles in marriage have been blurred and instead of the the man being the “breadwinner”, women are also becoming the breadwinner to make this a team effort.  This article connects to Jhumpa Lahiri’s “A Temporary Matter” because Shoba is a business woman and is just as much the breadwinner as Shukumar is. This author writes about how marriage has changed so much and some people get married for forever or just for a temporary time, Shoba and Shukumar are the ones that were married for a temporary time and fell apart over something they could’ve worked through. Divorce rates ranged from six to

Stephanie Coontz is a sociologist who is interested in marriage and the change in its structure over the time-span as love became a main proponent of the relationship involved in marriages. In her article, “What 's Love Got to Do With It,” Coontz argues that the more love becomes a part of the equation the less stable the institution of marriage becomes. Marriage at one point was a social contract that bound two families together to increase their property and wealth as well as ally connections. Each party entered into the contract knowing their roles and if one partner failed to meet the expectations, they were still contractually obligated to one another and were not allowed to divorce. As love became part of the equation, each partner was less sure of their obligations and often chose to end their marriages if at all possible.

Over the past decades, how Americans perceive the marital relationship greatly reformed, illuminating society’s values. In the past, marriage use to represent a legal contract to bear children and acquire finances, but today, “In all too many communities in the US, especially poor and minority ones, marriage is a retreat” (Wilcox et al., 2005, p. 5). Rather than observing marriage as an obligation, Americans now perceive a marriage to entail intimate commitments between affectionate partners. America transformed its values from the society and family to the individual level. Of the major values changes, which occurred over the past decades, this article exemplifies an increase in single-parent homes, cohabiting, and divorce. Due to America’s expansion of individualism and materialism, individuals no longer perceive their marriage as life long commitments. This transformation occurred because of a shift in societal values; society no longer places stigma on divorce and single parents, which aided in the increasing numbers of marital shifts. In fact, Americans tend to enter marriages with unrealistic expectations, expecting their partner to fulfill all of their needs without conflict. It stands as our unrealistic expectations and perceptions that caused a shift in marriages.

Andrew J. Cherlin, a sociologist at John Hopkins University and specialist in the sociology of families and public policy, attempts to answer the question: how has the institution of marriage changed in the United States during the past sixty years? Cherlin starts with the changes in marriage that come from many things and that mostly has to do with the long term changing in culture and morals of people. Recent decades have seen a development of individualism and an increasing importance in marriages. The increase of women into the workforce and the need for wage labor are the beginning of the trends brought on by transition of marriage.

When we are young we play house and we play doctor, we pretend we are husbands and wives to the kids we play with. Marriage is imbedded into our minds at a young age and we value marriage as we get older. We see examples of marriages through personal experience, the TV, and through the media, but how much has marriage changed now compared to the 1950’s? The idea of marriage has been altered and improved since the 1950’s because of feminism, views about individualism, and views of same-sex marriage.

In American culture the view on arranged marriages are not looked at very favorably. This is because we have grown up with the knowledge that when it comes time to marry we will have chosen our spouse of our own free will. The match will be a love match and one that is chosen through our own needs. Young men and women in India grow up with an opposite view on marriage. They know that when it comes time to marry their parents will find them a suitable mate and it will be considered scared and a lifelong commitment (Agence France-Presse.) A total of 74 percent of respondents from across India voted in favour of traditional "arranged" marriages, according to the poll by private television channel NDTV. In the Hindu faith, marriage is