Difficult Conversations Summary

Communication skills are quite essential in civilized societies. This is due to their numerous conventions in different aspects of life. These skills do not only involve the verbal side but also the nonverbal side. Nonverbal communication importance used to be neglected by individuals in the past. However, in recent years, people are starting to recognize their crucial roles in their daily lives. They are now more interested in the nonverbal phenomenon. Nonverbal communication is dominated by emotions. It is a method of conveying one's feeling including body postures, facial expressions and even physical contact. Although nonverbal communication might be associated with

I am originally from Puerto Rico, which is a country in which communication is an integral part of society. The cultural norm of the Puerto Rican culture is to speak up when necessary and communicate clearly if we want things to be done. At the same time, I believe that in order to produce results, the manner in which communicating takes place, is an extremely important component. My culture also showed me how the emotions used when communicating, such as the use of the hands and body language, will dictate the tone and flow of the communication. The literature suggests that the majority (as much as 76%) of the message we gibe to another person during conversations is carried by non-verbal or para-verbal communication. Thus, we must be very careful and strategic in our use o non-verbal communication (Van Acker, 1997).

Body Language/pg114: The way in which people use their bodies to give messages to others.

In order to discover “the problem”, it is important to recognize the structure of difficult conversations and what is said and not said. There are three types of conversations within a difficult conversation, “What

Did you know 80% of communication is through body language? After logging the majority of verbal communication of my everyday life, I was astounded by the significant amount of activity. If 20% communicates verbally, then it blows my mind to ponder the amount of non-verbal activity we use. This essay will cover how I communicate orally for 48 hours. First I will achieve the purpose of this essay, which is to interpret the analysis of my communication patterns. Then, I will embellish on which type of communication patterns I prefer the least and most. Next, I will relate the connection between location and the type of communication I use. Lastly, I will explain how I relate to Miriam-Webster Dictionary’s definition of communication.

There are thousands of verbal languages in the world, like English and Chinese. People use these languages to convey our opinions with others and express their feelings. Apart from verbal language, body language is another powerful language that helps people express themselves clearly. Take Mr Bean(1991-1995), a famous British silent sitcom for example. There is no verbal communication in this sitcom, the plot is derived by Mr Bean’s funny behavior. It is body language’s magic that makes this sitcom popular. In people’s daily life, they often use body language when they try to persuade others. As is often the case, if they manage to persuaded others, they will owe their success to verbal language. However, body language plays a key role in affecting others. But since body language is out-of-awareness, people tend to ignore it. Here is a video about an interview with Calgary’s mayor Naheed Nenshi. By analyzing Nenshi’s behavior, people can obviously see the importance of body language.

The first chapter of Difficult Conversations (2010) discusses the 3 types of conversations: the what happened conversations, the feelings conversations and the identity conversations. It is imperative that in each type of conversation that we “understand not only what is said, but also what is not said” (p.5). It’s like the pictures with the dog in the chair saying, ‘this is fine’ yet the entire room around him is in flames. If the dog were to just tell everyone there is a fire it would be easier to come to a conclusion. If we do not share what we are feeling then both people leave the conversation unclear on what their frustration is actually about.

Communication refers to the exchange of thoughts and ideas with the intention of conveying messages and information and checking that the information has been understood. Communicating involves more than just uttering words. In their book Look at Me When I Talk to You, S. Helmer and C. Eddy provide different ways of illustrating our words. The authors state that speakers convey messages through coverbal and nonverbal communication. Nonverbal communication or behaviors consist of a few aspects: kinesics which includes all bodily movement – posture, gesture, facial expression and eye contact; proxemics which has to do with the use of personal space; haptics which refers to all touching behavior such as a light tap on the shoulder;

Communication is generally defined as having both a verbal and nonverbal component. Whereas verbal communication often refers to the words we use in communication, nonverbal refers to communication that is produced by some means other than words (eye contact, body language or vocal cues, for example) (Knapp, 2002). In countless situations, it appears that an incredible volume of important interpersonal information is being quickly communicated, mostly nonverbally yet there is a great deal of misinformation and misunderstanding in face-to-face human relations.

“As much as 93 percent of the meaning that is transmitted between two people in face-to-face conversation can come from nonverbal channels… Most often, the receiver chooses the nonverbal aspects because they are more reliable than verbal

According to experts, a substantial portion of our communication is nonverbal. Every day, we respond to thousands on nonverbal cues and behaviors including postures, facial expression, eye gaze, gestures, and tone of voice. From our handshakes to our hairstyles, nonverbal details reveal who we are and impact how we relate to other people.

Communication is the ongoing exchange of messages that enables us to share our knowledge, attitudes, opinions and skills with one another (Miller, 1988). This process is composed of two dimensions – verbal and nonverbal . While is it undeniable that both the verbal and the nonverbal dimension are inseparable, research emphasises the dominance of the nonverbal message (cf., Argyle, 1975; Hall, 1966; Harrison & Crouch, 1975; Knapp, 1978, cited in Smith, 1979). Harrison and Crouch (1975) argue that, "in the development of each human being, nonverbal communication precedes and perhaps structures all subsequent communication" (p. 77), and thus suggest that the nonverbal dimension plays a role more significant than that with which we consciously associate it. After significant research Mehrabian (1968) was able to propose values for the three elements that compose interpersonal communication: "Total Impact = .07 verbal + .38 vocal + .55 facial" (p. 53). The most significant facet of Mehrabian 's formulation was the comparatively minute impact of the verbal message and the dominance of the nonverbal (i.e., 7% vs. 93%) (Smith, 1979). While studies under different conditions have developed varied conclusions regarding the exact weights of each communicative element (cf Keith, Tornatzky, & Pettigrew, 1974, cited in Smith, 1979), the overwhelming importance of the nonverbal domain is without doubt. Thus, if there exists any

Communication is a common necessity among people. Communication is needed in order to interact with other people in almost everything within day to day life. Communication can be viewed in two subdivisions, verbal communication and nonverbal communication. Verbal communication is based on using words and sounds to communicate with another person. Oppositely we have nonverbal communication, which is communication through sending and receiving wordless clues. Examples of nonverbal communication can include things like gestures, facial expressions, hugging, and shaking of hands. This literature review will further examine the history of nonverbal communication, the abilities of its use, how much of communication is nonverbal, why people use

Our body language is one that can also cause for confusion, misunderstanding, or even be helpful in making our verbal communication more impactful. Body language, in my opinion, is one of the most subconscious ways we communicate nonverbally. Our facial gestures, our hand gestures, our posture are all things we intrinsically pick up through our life experiences. Facial features are one of the most easily understood, and are universally recognized [7.]. The facial feedback effect is an interesting twist on facial features. The facial feedback effect states that our facial muscle triggers corresponding feelings. Essentially, nonverbal communication can communicate feeling or dictate them. Eye-contact provides information about the emotional state of a person. When someone is not able to look you in the eye when they are being asked incriminating questions, one may be interpreted as a liar, or making eye contact could make you appear more truthful. Another example of eye contact importance is when someone does not make eye contact when expressing emotion, they may be interpreted as sad or afraid. Posture, gesture, and movement also convey a lot of information. The way a person stands, holds themselves in different situations, and the way they walk can convey information about mood and confidence [1, 2]. Even the way a person dresses and the objects they carry with them are often used to convey messages about who they are and how they perceive themselves to others [2].

A study by Albert Mehrabian 1967 showed that 93% of communication is nonverbal with 55% of body language, and 38% of tonality, this takes into consideration that verbal communication only accounts for 7% of impact of all communication (Mehrabian, 2007).