Discipline in Childhood
Children require freedom to grow and to learn, but they will not thrive on unlimited freedom. The aim of discipline is to set reasonable limits which protect children from harm and teach them what is safe and what is not. If children are to grow up into responsible, conscientious, and dependable adults, they must learn the social, moral, and ethical standards that are considered acceptable in our society. They must also learn to respect the rights and property of others.
Children brought up without discipline may become selfish, greedy, dishonest, unpopular, uncooperative and insecure. Undisciplined children constantly demand attention. They may be inconsiderate or
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* Do not subject your child to excessive physical punishment.
* You should make as few rules as necessary and make them simple to understand.
* You should be a good role model for your child.
Children who are often in trouble usually suffer from too little affection, rather than too little punishment. The responsibility for starting the child in the right way belongs to the parents. Parents must serve as good examples for their children. Attitudes and behaviors of the children can be expected to be no better than those of the parents.
Children learn best from repetition, practice, and example; lecturing is less effective. The age at which punishment is appropriate depends on the intelligence and maturity of the child. Punishment, when required, should be immediate and inevitable. The penalty should be specified in advance and should be adhered to strictly. The form of punishment should be appropriate to the seriousness of the misbehavior and to the child's age. After a child has been punished, it is important to reassure the child that he or she is still loved and a valued member of the family and that the transgression has been forgiven.
Rules should be as few and clear as possible, but they should be strictly and consistently enforced. Rules must be appropriate to the
Helping children realise which behaviours are appropriate and responsible gor is paramount. Good, strong teamwork between adults will encourage good behaviour in children There are two ways we help teach children good behaviour, through positive reinforcement of good behaviours and negative reinforcement of bad
Punishing children for their wrong-doings has been and always will be necessary for a child's development of right and wrong. The different types of punishments parents use on their children work for various types and degrees of trouble the child is in. Laura Markham, a clinical psychologist that specializes in relationship-based parenting, assumes in her essay “Should You Spank Your Child?” that spanking is one of the worst punishments a child could receive from his parents. However, corporal punishment teaches responsibility and the difference between right and wrong, remains different from abuse, and is not the reason for issues in adulthood.
Children do not come with guidelines or instructions. What they do come with is a crucial set of physical and emotional needs that need to be met. To raise children properly, parents duties are not limited to just food, shelter and protection. Parents are largely responsible for their children’s success in life. Parents are required to teach and educate children. They have to shape knowledge and character into their children to prepare them to face the real world. To be successful with this, parents must provide self esteem needs, teach moral and values and provide discipline that is both effective and appropriate. As the generations have changed, many parenting styles have evolved, as well.
“Fortunately, children do not need “perfect” parents. They do need mothers and fathers who will think on their feet and who will be thoughtful about what they have done. They do need parents who can be flexible, and who can use a variety of approaches to discipline.” - James L. Hymes, Jr. this quote, I can say, is physically
One very simple word that describes discipline is training. A child is not born with the knowledge of what is acceptable or expected. A parent must invest their own time and patience while showing love and exemplary behavior while molding their children into becoming well behaved (Child Abuse vs. Discipline). Being a parent is a hard enough job already, but when it comes to being a parent having to discipline your child, it becomes much harder. It takes time for a child to learn and process new behaviors, and this is a reason a parent must not have a short fuse when it comes to discipling their children.
With discipline is all about reinforcing positive behaviors. One example can be to give out praises when a positive social behavior has been shown and encourage to continue the behavior. As the previous example that I used, if the parents had explained that it is not appropriate to hit or throw things at people. Then the child would have learned that what he did was wrong and would likely learn not to do it again if he is given an acceptable consequence to his behavior. When disciplining a child they must receive a consequence that is appropriate for his or her age.
Child discipline is an important part of parenthood. It is challenging for adults to manage children’s behaviors and find the correct lessons that will benefit their children. According to the research performed by Flynn (1998), most parents in the United States agree that "it is sometimes necessary to discipline a child with a good, hard spanking" (p.26). Socolar et al. performed research which agreed that “corporal punishment of children persists—roughly fifty percent of the parents of toddlers in the United States use corporal punishment as a regular method of disciplining their children.” (as cited in Gershoff, 2010, p.32). That is not to say that physical punishment is the solution as it can stop a behavior immediately but the results
For example: if a child decides to do drugs or physically harm someone, then they should get a spanking or a harsh scolding accompanied by a week of restriction on things they enjoy. Luscombe includes a quote involving the alternative punishments to spanking being more effective than spanking (par. 9). I normally agree with this, however I would add that it also depends on the child and their attitudes after the punishment has occurred. For instance, if a parent was to eliminate one of the stars on “The Star Chart,” and the child’s response was, “I don’t care,” then the parent would have to apply harsher punishments until the child has changed their attitude towards the punishment. Luscombe also includes information on the negative effects physical punishment may have on children, which should be taken into account when disciplining (par. 5).
Authoritarian parents normally do not interact with their children in positive ways and usually install fear into the child. Punishment is usually harsh and given without explanation. Children with authoritarian parents are often anxiety- ridden. Studies have shown that these children have lower self- esteem, show high aggressiveness and typically do less well in school. Permissive parenting consists of high nurture and acceptance, but these parents lack structure and control. These parents look at their children as “free spirits” who need space to learn and grow. Permissive parents are usually inconsistent with discipline. Children with permissive parents normally are impulsive and irresponsible. These children also lack any self- control since none was expected (Sclafani 47).
My prior understanding of discipline was uneducated and inaccurate. I was certain that discipline was related to punishment and the goal was to have a particular unwanted behavior to cease. A child that required discipline would be singled out, scolded, forced to perform a chore or action, such as sit for a time out, or the child would have something taken away, such as television or toys. As a child, I grew up in a household with parents who were primarily authoritative. They tended to be fair; however they did use punishment through "grounding", which generally meant that we were not able to engage in fun for set period of time. Other times, we were instructed to perform some sort of labor of their choice, such as washing my Dad's
An adult who practices punishment, controls a child externally. This communicates to a child that they are not able to control themselves, thus have no responsibility for their actions. Also, it can create in the child’s mind, the idea that they can commit a behavior so long as they do not get caught or are willing to accept the consequences. Behavior that is modified with punishment does not evolve from the understanding of what is expected in a society, but rather from fear. Since no understanding was obtained this will not
Implementing physical punishment is a topic that many people and even professionals seem to have some disagreement on it. Some believe that spanking should be used to discipline children, but others believe that spanking brings more damage than results. In this paper I will define what physical punishment is and where I stand in regards of this matter. In addition, I will explain the advice I would give to a parent who asks if spanking is a correct way of disciplining their children.
Discipline is one of the basic things a child learns from his parents before he or she faces the outside world to learn more about life as a whole. Teaching this trait can depend on how the parent shows it to their child and how they explain the importance of having this trait both in and out of their homes. Misbehaving children cannot be avoided as they are curious little beings and they have a tendency to explore. But there are some parents, even teachers, who do not tolerate misbehaving and they resort to corporal punishments such as spanking to make sure the child never forgets how painful it is to misbehave as they will remember the punishment entailed to it and become more disciplined. However, not all children would understand the
Being a parent comes with a lot of responsibility and difficult decision making. You always have your child's best interest at heart, but sometimes your child may disagree with the rules you have set down. That is why, I believe, the perfect parenting style is democratic. You can compromise with your child, but still have basic rules you want them to follow, without them feeling targeted or that you are being unfair. When i become a parent, I want to make sure my children have guidelines. I want them to be able to make their own mistakes and learn from them. Their health, their type of entertainment and the toys they play with are three major, broad categories that I would like to have a say in, along with their input of course.
Children are like flowers, if well taken care of they will bloom. If ignored or tortured, they will wither and die. Child discipline is one of the most important elements of successful parenting. Today, many people have this notion that physical abuse is in no way a solution to helping children discern between right and wrong. Since generations children have been taught the art of discipline through physical punishment. Often this approach to disciplining has resulted in two outcomes, one is where the child becomes more tolerant and is willing to adhere to what he/she has been told, or the other which more often results in children developing a sense of anguish and desire to revolt.