Drowning in a Sea of Avoidance

In the essay “The Trouble with Self-Esteem”, Lauren Slater is arguing that the theory of self-esteem should be banned. Slater states that “People with High Self-Esteem pose a greater threat to those around them than people with low Self-esteem”. Humans with low self-esteem humble themselves more and work harder to be noticed and to maintain the status quo of society. Slater stated that humans with high self-esteem were dangerous and posed a threat. Slater discuses facilities that could assist with humans who cope with self-esteem issues.

Many of us try to be someone we’re not just to fit in, be liked and wanted. Knowing self-worth is one of the top few topics, we seem to have a hard time understanding and even felt that it can be challenging. “For each situation, identity a dramatic title to represent the image you try to create” (Adler, Proctor, Towne, 79). Is it hard to believe that one self can feel the need to be able to change our persona just so we can feel powerful? “Research shows that, in the right circumstances, all response styles can help others accept their situation, feel better, and have a sense control over their problems” (Adler, Proctor, Towne, 273). We all seek understanding; overall we all love the attention right?

It is said that we internalise information we gain from the world and then we build it into our sense of self. In other words, when we human are praised and shown love and respect we gain high self-esteem and we forget about it and it doesn’t bother us. However, when we are cussed and something bad is said about us, we tend to think about it not forgetting it and those who experience this would have a low self-esteem. It is also said that those with low self-esteem others can increase it.

There are many instances where my family and even my closest friends question why I am so reserved. They sometimes ask me why I am unable to fully open up and talk about my thoughts and feelings like they are able to and I never had an answer. I was never able to figure out why I am this way until I took this test. I realized that being a private person is one of the weaknesses of my personality type and that it is very common amongst INFJ’s. This is something that is in fact easily noticeable based on the type of person I am. I like to keep my thoughts and feelings to myself. I find I very difficult to fully trust those around me. Finding someone I can fully trust whether it may be a friend or a love interest is like finding a needle in a haystack. Being a private person has made me worried about my future life and it makes me wonder if I will ever find someone who can fully understand and relate to me. I wonder if ill ever be able to find some whom I can blindly trust. In order for me to find those whom I can trust, I have realized that I need to let myself loose. I have learned to confide in a few of my closest friends. I have learned that sharing my thoughts and feeling with those whom I’m close to not only makes our relationship stronger but it makes me feel lighter. It makes me feel as if a weight load has been lifted off my chest and restores my trust in

While people may struggle in life and find themselves in difficult situations, everyone has different ways to solve their problems. There are some decisions that turn out badly and lead to disappointments. Some people learn from their mistakes and try to avoid them in order to improve the relationships with their partners, friends, and coworkers. However, many people don’t like to admit their mistakes. They find that the easiest way to get rid of their mistakes is by putting the blame on the other side. Mistakes Were Made (But Not by Me) talks in detail about these problems that we face in our in our daily lives. This inspirational book has convinced me that self-justification affects relationships between people. The authors, Carol Tavris and Elliot Aronson, give answers for an important question of “why we justify foolish beliefs, bad

I have always been afraid of people even when I was younger and in primary school I had this irrational fear. I hated school because of it. School was mortifying for me and I would cry, but I would cry before any of the other students arrived. I think I was afraid of my own emotions back then and I still am, but i’m trying to walk one step at a time across that imaginary bridge of fears I have. I don’t think i’m anywhere close to fully crossing it yet, it’s like I take two steps forward and one step back. Now that i’m in highschool, I realise that I have to get across, and soon because if I don’t get across I’ll fall to my doom. Everyday the ropes holding the bridge up are unraveling, I know I must move fast, but I feel as though my fears outweigh my confidence. But, I have been challenging myself and taking just one small step at a time to cross the bridge of fears. I wear clothes that have colors and patterns, anything that I like I have forced myself to wear it because it’s who I am and I can express myself. It has taken me awhile to realize that it’s okay to be yourself and express who you truly

In novels like “To Hell with Dying” Alice W expressed self-esteem. One thing she didn’t explain was her conflict with self-esteem. At the age of eight she was accidently shot in the eye by her brother and was blinded one one eye up until she was fourteen. Because of that incident she fell into deep depression and found comfort in writing. Also, on her journey in a novel named “The Color Purple,” Alice used a character named Miss Celie, to show how self esteem cam affect your life in the long run. Miss Celie at age 14, ironically because that’s how old Alice was when she finally got her surgery to replace her sight, struggled with feeling like she was important to anybody in her life. Self-esteem has made heavy inroads into the lives of African-Americans, these degradations

feelings and thoughts fueled my low confidence. People say if you fake it enough, it eventually becomes like second skin. I decided to fake confidence. I continued my bubbly facade. I looked in the mirror and repeated to myself that I’m allowed to love myself.

Throughout many of my journal entries I express the fear of going outside of my comfort zone. This fear I have is the reason why I am not vey social able or outgoing. In many of my reflections I also express the fact that I’m afraid of other people and how they will judge me. Last week in class we learned about how adolescence believe in an imaginary audience. I don’t think I ever really grew out of believing in an imaginary audience. I still constantly think I am the center of people’s attention and not in a good way.

The only thing there is to fear is a person saying no to what you are asking. However, to ever be accepted or get a yes you have to risk being rejected or nothing will ever happen. For example, if you see someone you like while you are walking if you never put yourself out there and talk them nothing will ever happen. Therefore, this challenge has helped me realize that rejection is not something to fear but it is a necessity to move forward or open different opportunities throughout life. Consequently, after this exercise I am more inclined to taking risks even if there are consequences because risks are what allow us to improve, make the most out of life, and pursue what we want to do.

Your self-esteem acts as a joyous hollar or a miserable wail echoing through a cavern that is your life. This hollar, or wail, echoes into interpersonal relationships, without a doubt. Having had been friends with Kelsi, whose self-esteem is a noticeably miserable cry, and Beca, who could shout her confidence to the moon, I notice I hold very different relationships with the two of them. My relationships with them differ especially in interpersonal conflicts. Noticing this, I couldn’t help but wonder how self-esteem’s echo alters instances of interpersonal conflict. I set out researching, asking: are people with high self-esteem likely to have more or fewer interpersonal conflicts than those with low self-esteem? I wanted answers of course, but also explanations.

The most challenging obstacles any person has to overcome are the psychological ‘barriers’ we often put on ourselves, myself included. The colloquialism of ‘You are Your Own Worst Critic’ is often true for most people, and ordinarily overcoming it is a much tougher feat. One day I choose to stop allowing this mentality into my life and into my thoughts. While I still have self-review, I allow myself to be flawed and stopped hyper-analyzing what another person might think of me if I did ‘X’ action.

No one is perfect. Certain humans do not know how to deal with self-flaws; therefore, self-hate is imbedded in the minds and hearts of these individuals. Self-hate is more commonly closed in, and not often exposed. According to Van Sell et al. “(2005) estimated that 3 million people in the USA choose to cut, burn, or cause other types of tissue destruction to themselves.” (qtd. In Hicks,

Throughout my life, I have never really been able to place my trust in many people. I have always been avoiding them, as if they were the plague. Yet, over the last few years, I have been forced into many different situations that I never truly enjoyed being in. I tried my best to ignore them, and hope that they would go away. But, alas that never happened. I was content with this never ending cycle of situations that forced me to act differently than who I knew I was. Situations that pushed my emotional limits further than I had ever wanted them to go. But, it never seemed to be enough for me. I remember the first time I started to take a knife to my skin, and how it felt. I

Being continuously criticized with the aid of own family, buddies, and society tends to slowly strip us of our feelings of self worth. Our low self-worth strips us of our self esteem to make even the smallest of decisions. We assume little of ourselves, and experience we aren't really worth a penny and do no longer deserve to be glad. High self esteem is right maximum of the time, however some people have too excessive self esteems and they might come on robust. People may also call seek advice from those kind as "cocky" or "demanding. " But in view that low self confidence is still worse than the better one, let's see what solutions there are to