Effects of Growing Up in a Dysfunctional Family

2328 Words Mar 25th, 2012 10 Pages
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Growing Up In A Dysfunctional Family|
Developmental Psychology|
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Denise King|
4/18/2011|

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Growing Up In a Dysfunctional Family

When some people look back on their childhood they see happy times full of family memories, traditions, love, and encouragement. When I look back on my childhood I remember drug abuse, visiting my step father in jail, going without utilities, and playing the role of a mother at the age of eight. I knew I was different from other children. I knew that my parents depended on me to play the role of an adult. They depended on me to get up every morning and get my brother and sister on the school bus. I knew they depended on me to go straight home from school every day so I could babysit. I would wake my mom
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Since the family’s survival is dependent on the enabler, they may pay the cost of stress-related illnesses, never having his or her own needs met, and be a sufferer for the cause of the family. Ironically, because the enabler permits the dependent’s behavior, they are also preventing the corrective experience that crisis brings, which may be the only thing that stops the dependents downward spiral. The hero is usually the oldest child. They are also named as “the good child” or “the caretaker”. The hero takes on the role of a parent and feels responsible for the emotional health of the family. The hero is characteristically an over-achiever and over-responsible. The family looks at the hero’s as a source of humility and honor, and it makes the family feel as if they are doing well. The hero may do well in school and be good at sports and obtain good employment while inside the hero suffers from feelings of insufficiency, failure, or guiltiness. These feelings derive from thoughts that no matter how well the hero does, it will not heal the wounds of their family. The hero’s obsessive drive to accomplish something may lead to stress-related illness as well as compulsive over working. Since the hero tries so hard to do well, he or she often obtains a great deal of positive attention. However, inwardly, the hero feels empty and unable to express their true feelings. The second
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