Essay on Mother as Villain and Victim in Amy Tan's The Joy Luck Club

 In the Joy Luck Club, the author Amy Tan, focuses on mother-daughter relationships. She examines the lives of four women who emigrated from China, and the lives of four of their American-born daughters. The mothers: Suyuan Woo, An-Mei Hsu, Lindo Jong, and Ying-Ying St. Clair had all experienced some life-changing horror before coming to America, and this has forever tainted their perspective on how they want their children raised. The four daughters: Waverly, Lena, Rose, and Jing-Mei are all Americans. Even though they absorb some of the traditions of Chinese culture they are raised in America and American ideals and values.  This inability to communicate and the clash

Throughout Jing-mei’s life, though she does not realize it, the people she interacts with and the trials she goes through all help her discover who she is, and help her find her own path in life. Not only does she learn who she is, but she also learns more about her mother; which helps her understand why her mother says and acts the way that she does. This knowledge of her mother helps Jing-mei realize that she needs to compromise with her mother sometimes, and she becomes more willing to embrace her

Jing-mei Woo’s mother, Suyuan, pressures Jing-mei to be a genius. Suyuan pushes Jing-mei to try new skills. Initially, Jing-mei is excited by the prospect of being a prodigy, but after a string of failures, she loses faith in herself and grows lazy and cynical. After constantly running away from her mother’s expectations and refusing to do her work, her mother eventually seems to give up as well. However, Suyuan later becomes inspired to make Jing-mei learn the piano, enlisting the help of her deaf neighbor to teach Jing-mei. In an act of desperate rebellion, Jing-mei does not put in any effort into practicing the piano, taking advantage of her teacher’s deafness. She ends up failing miserably when she performs in a church talent show. To her surprise, her mother disregards her failure and tells her to go to piano practice just a few days later. However, Jing-mei ignores her mother’s demands and explains her feelings on the issue: “‘I’m not going to play anymore,’ I said nonchalantly. ‘Why should I? I’m not a genius’” (141).

Through this, and other attempts at making little Jing-Mei famous, such as cutting her hair, getting her a piano, and forcing her to play it, Jing-Mei realizes that "...unlike my mother, I did not believe that I could be anything I wanted to be. I could only be me."(Tan 154)

She did not consider the fact that she had a great potential if she tried harder, which her mother clearly see. Jing Mei felt bad in the end when she reminisce her memory of her mother's effort and disregard everything her mother did for her. Jing Mei realize what she did was not the right thing to do. After all she was just another child that is need to be understood just like Sonny. I also felt bad that I did not met my parent's expectation to me. I graduate high school without putting all my effort, I know could have done better. I remember the time my parents keep bugging me to take the SAT they said they will going to pay for it until I passed or get a high score. But I took it once and did not do good because I did not tried to study at all. I did not know what was going on in my mind that time maybe because I was struggling to find what I really want to be with my life. My parents were really disappointed at me but they still encourage me to do the test over again. I did not re-take it, and it was the worse decision I ever had in my life so far.

Eventually Jing Mei stood up to her mother and shouted, “ ‘You want me to be something that [I am] not!’ [Jing Mei] sobbed… ‘[I will] never be the daughter you want me to be!’... ‘Then I wish I [was not] your daughter!’ ” (Tan, 142). At the start, Jing Mei does not appreciate all that her mother does for Jing Mei leading to anger and

Jing-mei felt that her mother was pushing her so hard to be a prodigy that it started to become pointless. Jing-mei states in the story, “‘I’m not going to play anymore,’ I said nonchalantly. ‘Why should I? I’m not a genius’” (Tan 230). The dialogue by Jing-mei explains how she did not want to learn piano anymore because she felt she could not do it, causing tension with her mother. This tension led to Jing-mei arguing with her mother and Jing-mei calling her mother out about her family in China. The narrator explains in the story, “And I could sense her anger rising to its breaking point. I wanted to see it spill out. . . ‘Then I wish I’d never even been born!’ I shouted. ‘I wish I were dead! Like them!’” (Tan 231). This event in the story led to Jing-mei and her mother’s relationship being basically destroyed. The events throughout the story were all affected by this antagonistic relationship that Jing-mei and her mother

She thought long and hard one night and soon decided, “I won’t let her change me, I promise myself. I won’t be what I’m not” (Tan 223). This was the start to a long, tiring battle between the two which would soon, unknowingly, damage them mentally and emotionally, enduringly. She began neglecting her mother’s tricks to help her and started to rebel. After her mother enrolled her in piano lessons, Jing-mei took complete advantage of them and her deaf piano instructor. She “would play after him, the simple scale, the simple chord, and then [I] just played some nonsense that sounded like a cat running up and down on top of garbage cans” (Tan 226). It showed how little effort she put in and how she was going against her mother’s wishes to no extent, wasting her hard earned money just to make a statement. It seemed the harder and more she was pushed, the less Jing-mei believed in herself or her mother’s attempts.

The mother is shocked and doesn’t know what to say. “Her chest was heaving even more and her mouth was open, smiling crazily as if she were pleased I was crying” (Tan 231). She is so completely embarrassed her mom is sad she is bursting out crying. The mom is very shocked because all of her friends were there watching and now she feels terrible for bragging about Jing-mei before the show started. “Why had she given up hope?” (Tan 232). She just doesn’t care anymore; she gave up on herself. She wanted to be a prodigy but was not willing to work for it, she just stop caring and gave up because she got frustrated. Her mother’s test that she would give to her and the talent show at the church all accumulated and she just gave up. Her mother tried to do the best for her, but it was up to her to put in the work and be dedicated to be a prodigy and the perfect person that she wanted to

Today’s society is so blinded by the illusion of perfection that it fails to realize the consequences of trying to become something impossible. This is reflected in the short story “Two Kinds”. The main character, Jing-mei, and her mother immigrate from China to America, where her mother wishes her daughter to become a prodigy. Jing-mei is excited to be a prodigy at first, but begins to lose hope after consistently failing her mother’s expectations. She rebels against her mother’s impractical tests, and Jing-mei’s mother slowly gives up.

Also, their relationship is shaped by the pressure Suyuan puts on her daughter. When Jing-Mei was growing up, her mother had the need for her daughter to be smart, talented, and a respectful Chinese daughter. This pressure put on Jing-Mei resulted in misunderstanding between mother and daughter. Jing-Mei constantly believed, “that she was disappointing her mother,” because she felt as if she failed at everything her mother wanted her to do. She believed she could never be as perfect as her mother was. Therefore she doesn’t think she is worthy enough to take her mother’s place at the Joy Luck Club “They must wonder now how someone like me can take my mother’s place” (Tan, 27). Jing-Mei does not understand that her mother wanted the best for her; Suyuan wanted Jing-Mei to challenge herself because that is how one builds up character. Suyuan thinks her daughter could do anything she proposed to do but never put enough effort into anything “Lazy to rise to expectations” (Tan 31). Furthermore, Suyuan forced Jing-Mei to learn how to play the piano and then perform at a recital. Jing-Mei rebelled against her mother and refused to learn how to play the piano well. So, at the recital she ends up forgetting the music notes. Jing-Mei blames her embarrassment on her mother and states,

In the end she blows a piano recital and believes this is when her mother's last hope for her dies, and a few days later she gets into a heated argument with her mother again where Jing-mei says she wishes she were dead. Leaving it unresolved till years later where they made peace with her mother offering her the piano. Jing-mei’s mother didn’t let her daughter express herself in what she wanted to do and therefore Jing-mei was lost with herself and never tried at anything for fear it was for her mother's pleasing, which is why I believe parents should let their kids find their own way in life but still guiding them in the right

As many people grow up, they begin to reflect on their childhood and wonder what they had done. In the story, the mother makes every opportunity that she did not have and gives it to her daughter. The statement of “Jing-mei's mother herself harbors enormous guilt about abandonment, having lost

At the end of the story, Jing Mei switches her narration from that of a child to that of the adult allowing the reader to see the "adult" perspective on her life. No longer is the relationship between Jing Mei and her mother antagonistic. With the offering of the piano, the mother tells her, "You have natural talent. You could have been genius if you want to" (Tan 1). Jing Mei states that she couldn’t. Then her mother states, "You just not trying" (Tan 1). Her mother bore her no anger or sadness when she made these statements and Jing Mei gave no argument in return.

The only mistake on the mother’s part is that she has overdone it (going to the extent where Jig-Mei starts to feel unhappy about herself) and neglected the possible uniqueness of her daughter. This is something common at status quo where some families suffer the strain between a parent (or parents) and a child whose concomitant psychological state brought about by a false sense of “I am already a grown up” sows costly conflicts. For this fact, it is submitted that Jing-Mei’s coming of age is insufficient. But is also noteworthy to state that Jing-Mai subsequently embraced her mother’s desire, it is just unfortunate that it came a little bit too late (when her mother was already