Eulogy For Grandmother

It was an early Christmas morning, I could smell the sugar cookie smell making its way through my house. I could only think of one person that could make this happen, my Abuelita. “Grandma” I shout from my room as she was in the kitchen. I wanted cookies so bad before opening our presents. But we wait for my dad to come from his house before opening presents.

When I look back at my childhood I cannot picture it without you. You have helped shaped who I am today and for that I thank you. When I think of you i think about all the love that you have to give. I am so lucky to have you in my life and I will always cherish the memories that I have with you.

I sat down to write this eulogy the weekend before my mother died. I was in a chair next to her bed, keeping her company as she dozed. Initially, I thought this would be the hardest thing I would ever write. But the truth is, as I watched her sleep, I took comfort in knowing she was lost in a dream-world instead of plagued by her dark reality—and the words poured out of me like I too was lost in a world of dreams. Dreams that brought me back to the imaginary games we played when I was just a kid, secrets confided between a mother & dauggter, lessons learned, I love you”s exchanged, her beaming pride, our friendship, arguments that exhausted both of us, and the reconciliations that always brought us back together.

Thank you for reading my post and responding as well. Yes a new practice is being implemented in the place that I work. We just had a new Nurse Manager, and she has implemented a 15 minute huddle which every day before the start of any shift. All nursing staff is expected to attend including the respiratory therapists. Being discussed are the areas that we are falling short, especially on documentation. I have noticed a drastic change since the initiation of this practice.

The first footsteps we've ever taken are the ones that have imprinted the inside of our mothers' stomachs. Mothers don't just give birth to us, they give us a life to live. Now, some might say mothers are supposed to give birth; it's a natural process that is their duty. It's physically straining to have a child, but it takes a true warrior to raise a child. It is often forgotten how much they continuously provide for us and how many sacrifices they make. My mother has been my inspiration, not because of her title as my mother but because she is the prime example of a what I call a hero.

I interviewed my grandmother. Her name is Sandra Sue Wardlaw. But I call her Mamaw. Mamaw was born in Dayton Ohio on July 25, 1938. She still lives in Dayton, but Brooklynn Dayton. Mamaws parents names are Roy and Ruth Strader. Roy is her dad and Ruth is her mom. Mamaw also has three sisters and one brother. Their names are Marcia, Cheryl, Lynn, and Jerry Strader. By now all of her sisters have married last names. Mamaw has lived all over Dayton Ohio. She attended Jefferson Township School System when she was in school. Mamaw is short and has grey hair. Sometimes she dies her hair blonde. She needs glasses to read and is very sassy.

To my beautiful wife Hallie Baxter, you have saved my life by giving me purpose and perspective. When I think back about the time I was sitting at that bus stop bench in japan, and you messaged me that day. I didn’t know what to say at first, but as time passed and our love grew our wedding day finally came. I knew when I looked into your eyes that day I found the other half of my heart. Never in my life have I gazed upon someone so kind, strong, beautiful or smart. You have stuck beside me through thick and thin. Without you I would have never laid eyes on our beautiful daughters face. I don’t know where I would have ended up without you. But I know I am grateful to be with you every sec of every day. What I’m trying to say is that you taught

If there's anyone who could brighten up a room full of people arguing over which part of the turkey they want, disagreeing over politics, sharing the latest family gossip, it's definitely him. It's Thanksgiving and as I enter my grandparent’s house, I see him conversing with my aunt who's resemblance is uncanny, as he sips his glass of white wine and instantly looks up at me. It’s my grandfather, Gelo.

The scent of fresh pine and baked turkey dominates over all senses, surging into the crisp air of the kitchen. Presents are stacked to the brim of the Christmas tree, while a toy train intermittently passes by. Effervescent ornaments sparkle with the memories of past years. Rooms are full with aunts, uncles, distant cousins, all of who push their troubles aside to celebrate this day once a year: Christmas . It is chaos, but the good kind.

I love you with all my heart. I am so blessed to have you as my mom, partner-in-crime, and best friend. A quote that reminds me of the impact you have made on my life and me is “When you’re a child she walks before you to set an example. When you’re a teenager she walks behind you to be there if you should need her. When you’re an adult she walks beside you so that as two friends you can enjoy life together.” Throughout my childhood and now I have always been attached at your hip. I can remember dressing like you, acting like you, trying to be everything that you were, and I still try to do that today. You and I have been inseparable ever since I could walk. We would always play with Barbie’s and put barrettes in your hair. Every day we are together we create lasting memories, laugh until we cry, and smile from ear to ear. Our friendship is a special bond that will last forever. Through laughter, WORRY, smiles and tears

Thank you for your kind words regarding my grandmother; she and I were extremely close, and my brother and I spent hours with her. Sadly, she passed away a couple years ago after being sick for a while. A death like hers is so bittersweet. I watched her let go of life, but with it she let go of all the pain of her illness, and that made the loss a little easier. I inherited the ring my grandfather gave her when they were both young and my grandpa had just returned from the Korean War. They got married soon after this and I think about how young they were and wonder how they were able to remain happy for so many years. I wear the ring a lot because it’s like I own a little piece of her. After her children and grandchildren, that ring was probably the thing she loved most in this world, and I’m so thankful I get to carry it.

You were alive for 19 years of my life, but I only had you for 16 to 17 years of my life. While you there psychically, you were not there mentally or emotionally. I spent my entire life being my own cheerleader. You couldn’t provide me with the type of support I needed. You never could and in the end, you never did. I spent my entire childhood being a mini adult. I spent it being a parent to myself, my siblings and to you; my own mother.

“Take me with you to America, dad!” I said. Tears escape my grandmother’s eyes. “I am tired of living the gypsy life!” Sobs thunder out of her, spill over the banks.

Thank you for everything that you have done for me this summer. You have been fully supportive of everything that I have pursued. Whether it was putting on my conference, late night conversations, or the many meals cooked. You have truly made me like this home is a safe place and one where people want to be in community with me.

I am so fortunate to have a mom like mine. Her name is Carol, she is a mom of four but she makes me feel special. Whenever I'm sad, mad or whatever she's always there to talk to for a advice, not just for me, but for anyone. She always taught me to be kind and open mined and happy. I've learned so much from her. She is the main reason I am who I am today, and allows me to be me and do what I dream to do, and supports me in whatever I do, and she always has my back and my best interest in mind. I inspire to be like her someday. I am So fortunate to have her as my mom