Evaluating the Most Effective Parenting Styles with Children: Positive Outcomes in the Home and Classroom. Regina Struga Holy Family University

The four primary parenting styles are Authoritarian, Permissive, Authoritative, and Uninvolved parenting styles. Authoritarian parents are very controlling and strict with their children. They expect obedience form their children and don’t tolerate expressions of disagreement. In contrast, Permissive parents are more relaxed and provide inconsistent feedback. They require little of their children and don’t see themselves as responsible for their children’s behavior. They also don’t set limits or control over their children. Authoritative parents are firm and set clear and consistent limits for their children. While they tend to be strict they show love and emotional support for them as well. These parents tend to reason with their child as to why they should behave a certain way. These parenting styles also encourage the child to be independent. The fourth parenting style is uninvolved parenting style. These parents show interest in their children and display indifferent or rejecting behavior towards them. They detach emotionally and only see themselves as providers of materials goods such as shelter, food, and clothing.

* Authoritative parents set clear and consistent limits for children. They are flexible but firm, whichs leads to children who are responsible, cooperative, and self reliant.

However, they"(Morin, 2015) do "allow exceptions to the rule"(Morin, 2015). Authoritarian Parenting establishes rules but expects that the children/child will follow them without exceptions. Permissive Parenting tends to be lenient and only tends to get involved when there is a serious problem. Uninvolved Parenting is neglectful, they seem to "not meet"(Morin, 2015) the "children's needs and expect"(Morin, 2015) them "to raise themselves."(Morin, 2015).

The authoritarian parenting style is a style in which the parent has the only say. This parenting style “is based on obedience and the expectation of a child obeying without an explanation required” (McMillian). Authoritarian parents are more likely to discipline their children. Children of authoritarian parents don’t often get

Authoritarian parents hold their children to an exceedingly high level of status and success. In this style of parenting, children are expected to follow the strict rules established by the parents. Failure in following rules typically results in

Webster’s dictionary defines parenting as the process of raising and educating a child from birth until adulthood. As someone who parented four biological children, and earned the title of grandma, I can offer a lot of personal insight into the subject of parenting, and my first pearl of wisdom is that parenting is harder than one would think. Children do not come with an operation manual and it usually only takes new parents only a few days before they realize how blissfully delusional they were. Naturally, well meaning parents who understand the implications of their influence on shaping their child into happy, healthy, and successful adults, are naturally humbled with the awesome responsibility, and seek to develop a parenting strategy with positive empirical results.

Authoritarian parents normally do not interact with their children in positive ways and usually install fear into the child. Punishment is usually harsh and given without explanation. Children with authoritarian parents are often anxiety- ridden. Studies have shown that these children have lower self- esteem, show high aggressiveness and typically do less well in school. Permissive parenting consists of high nurture and acceptance, but these parents lack structure and control. These parents look at their children as “free spirits” who need space to learn and grow. Permissive parents are usually inconsistent with discipline. Children with permissive parents normally are impulsive and irresponsible. These children also lack any self- control since none was expected (Sclafani 47).

Authoritarian parents have low involvement and high demand on their children. They are extremely harsh and require their children to submit to their commands and surveillance with little or no communication. Children with these type of parents are not given room to discuss with their parents. They are to comply to their parents with unquestionable respect, and great levels of achievement are anticipated at all times. The result of defying the commands is merciless punishment, which can include yelling and hitting.

A parent is not only the mom who holds you close for nine months and then many years, or the dad who plays baseball with you, but also someone who is there from the start, guiding you to the right path of knowledge and teaching you how to stay on the right path on your own. For years psychologists have defined ways to correctly support a child to adulthood. Some people conclude parenting their children after the child reaches the age of 18 and some have the duty as a lifelong job. As years pass so do generations and media changes very constantly and plays a factor in how children act and respond to certain stimuli. According to

Authoritarian is when parents use shame, humiliation, anger, or physical discipline. Permissive parents impose few restrictions on the children. Authoritative parents do not employ shame, humiliation, or physical punishment but do maintain rules and limits.

Larry J. Nelson’s study, Parenting in Emerging Adulthood: An Examination of Parenting Clusters and Correlates, was an attempt to gather groups of parents and study how they maintained control, responsiveness and how their relationships correlated with the outcomes and success of their children (2011). The groups of parents were then identified as uninvolved, controlling-indulgent, or. authoritative. The last group was identified as the mother being inconsistent or the father being labeled average. One of the main ideas in the introduction is that individual’s ages 18-24 do not consider themselves adults as well as these individual’s parents do not label them as adults either (et. al., 2011) . This poses the question; do these parents still

Authoritative parenting styles are when a parent demands and maintain a high level of control over the children but also warm and receptive. Permissive parenting style is when the parent places few controls or demand on the child. Authoritarian parenting styles are when the parent is strict, punitive and not warm. Uninvolved parents give children a lot of freedom and generally stay out of their way. Some parents may make a conscious decision to parent in this way, while others are less interested in parenting or unsure of what to do.

Authoritarian is only one of three parenting styles that Baumrind details. The other two styles include authoritative and permissive. These two variations in parenting styles were seen in the way my relatives and friends’ parents approached parenting. I observed how the parents of my close friend handled parenting. They maintained control over aspects in my friend’s life like school and chores but allowed the freedom to make decisions in areas of social activities. The most striking difference between my parents and my friend’s is the use of reasoning and the expression of warmth. Her parents provided justification behind their commands and or punishments while maintaining a sense of love and affection. The bond and love that is evident between my friend and her parents is not as strong in the relationship between my parents and me. The style that her parents exhibit is known as authoritative because of their focus on some parental control, use of reasoning and warmth. While on the other hand, my cousins raised their children in a completely different manor using a permissive parenting style. While they provide obvious love and affection towards their children, they fail to exert control and regulations. They did not have any real sense of rules in their household. Their children tend to act and do whatever they wanted with little to no repercussions.

For the reasons given above, authoritarian parenting is a style I would highly not advice for parents to raise their children with; instead, having a wonderful relationship with the parent, it just draws a line between the parent and the kid making it hard for them to have a close bond. Children raised by authoritarian parents tend to conform easily, yet may also suffer from depression and anxiety, often have lower self-esteem, have difficulty in social situations due to a lack of social competence and Some children display more aggressive behavior outside the home (Cherry,

high standards, have strict punishment, have low communication with his or her child, and do not show much affection to the child. Authoritarian parents basically parent with an iron fist. The second parenting style is permissive parenting. Permissive parents parent with high nurturance and communication but rare punishment, guidance, or control. Basically permissive parents would rather play the role of the child’s friend, and the last parenting style is authoritative parenting. Authoritative parents set limits and enforce rules, but they also listen to their children.