Family and Death

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Loss can be described as many things; the misplacement of tangible items, the ending of a close relationship with a friend, a goal not achieved or the death of a loved one. Through the readings, posts and responses of this course we have seen that individuals each respond to their loss in ways that are unique to them, yet there is a common thread amid it all - everyone grieves and mourns their losses and their lives are forever changed. While reviewing the losses that I have experience, I at first attempted to define which would be the most significant and there for most deserving of further thought and ultimately inclusion in this lossography. What I realized was that significant does not always mean huge or all encompassing, that some…show more content…
I do not mean to diminish the impact the other losses had, certainly seeing the affect my grandfathers death had on my grandmother shaped some of my ideas not only of grief, she was never the same, she did not laugh as much and the light in her eyes was not as bright, but it also shaped some of my ideals about romantic love. To the day she died - 28 years after my grandfather - my grandmother kept all of her checks and official documents titled “Mrs. Willis Goodrich”, and she never removed her wedding ring. The death of my Uncle Forest was the first time I associated anger with death, my Aunt seemed so numb at first and then for months she was so angry at him for not taking better care of himself, for continuing to smoke when she asked him repeatedly to try to stop and for not asking for help moving the ice house he was pushing when he had a massive heart attack and died. She told me later that it was not until she not only recognized but believed that he had not been trying to die, that he had not wanted to leave her any more than she wanted him to leave, that she was finally able to forgive him for dying and move on with her life. My grandmothers death was different from my grandfathers not only because it was not entirely unexpected, she was almost 90 and had advanced Parkinson’s disease, but more in how I reacted to it.

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