Father Son Relationships In Things Fall Apart

Okonkwo life is “dominated by fear, the fear of failure and of weakness” (Achebe 13). When Okonkwo was a boy, his playmates teased him calling, saying that his father was agbala. Okonkwo’s father, Unoka, was lazy. He did not work on his farm; he died in great debt. He did not acquire a single title. He did not have a barn to pass down to his son. Unoka is a type of man who is scorned in Umofia. He is seen as weak and effeminate. As Okonkwo grows older, he is determined not become a failure like his father. His father was weak; he will be strong. His father was lazy; he will be hard-working. Okonkwo earned his fame by defeating the reigning wrestling champion. Okonkwo diligently plants yam, building a successful farm. He builds himself an obi, has three wives and many children. His fame “rested on solid personal achievements” (Achebe 3). Okonkwo will not let one womanly trait sully his reputation. Therefore, he “hate[d] everything that his father Unoka had loved” (Achebe 13). One of these was gentleness. Okonkwo refuses to show any signs of emotion, except his temper. He

Okonkwo also tries to show himself as an unsympathetic character to show that he is not a weak man, like his father, Unoka. (Being a weak man is a very degrading quality for the culture of Umofia.) An example of Okonkwo’s unsympathetic personality is Ikemefuna’s death. Although Okonkwo treasured the presence of the adopted buy, Ikemefuna, Okonkwo contributes the last and fatal blow to Ikemefuna, causing him to die in the Evil Forest. Okonkwo, regardless of his love for the boy, killed Ikemefuna ultimately to prove his manliness and strength to the tribe, a valued aspect of the culture. “Okonkwo’s machete descended twice and the man’s head lay beside his uniformed body.” (Achebe 146) Okonkwo is also very unsympathetic in regards to his father, Unoka. Unoka was a poor man who was always in debt; he had an interest in music and enjoyed talking.

9. “Okonkwo’s first son, Nwoye, was then twelve years old but was already causing his father great anxiety for his incipient laziness. At any rate, that was how it looked to his father, and he sought to correct him by constant nagging and beating. And so Nwoye was developing into a sad-faced youth.”

Okonkwo’s oldest son, Nwoye, has to achieve high expectations, to be just like his father. If he falls short of Okonkwo’s near perfection, he will face consequence usually in the form of physical harm. Okonkwo wants Nwoye to be strong, powerful, independent, and hard-working. He must be like is father, and not like his grandfather, Unoka, or his mother. Unoka was an absolute failure in Okonkwo’s eyes, and a terrible father, who did nothing to help the family. Okonkwo is a man and wants his son to be a man too, not womanly like his mother. Okonkwo wanted “his son to be a great farmer and a great man” (33). Okonkwo is “worried about Nwoye....my children do not resemble me...too much of his mother in him” (66). Okonkwo knows that Nwoye resembles more of his mother than him, but also knows that he resembles Unoka too. Both fathers want their sons to be just like them, but do little to ask what they want in life, and neither father will budge on what they want for their sons.

In the beginning, Okonkwo feared being like his father, he raised his family and built up his life by his self because he did not want to be like his father. “He had no patience with unsuccessful men. He had had no patience with his father.” (pg. 1 TFA) the book said. He wasn’t very fond of his dad; his dad did not own much and had a lot of debt with everyone. Okonkwo did not want to grow up like his father; “In his

Unoka is Okonkwo’s father, he is a very lazy man and has amassed many debts. Okonkwo is very ashamed of Unoka and seems to hate him very much. Achebe states

Okonkwo treated his son and daughter very differently. The child-father relationship between Okonkwo and Nwoye was a distant and strained one while Okonkwo exhibited another type of feeling towards Ezinma which is filled with care and concern. This was due to the fact that Nwoye “was already causing his father great anxiety for his incipient laziness” whereas Ezinma was thought to have the “right spirit” and “alone understood [Okonkwo’s] every mood”.

Okonkwo is initially introduced as a proud, hardworking, successful warrior. He is described as "clearly cut out for great things" (6). But he is the son of a ne'er-do-well father; though genial and inoffensive, Unoka must certainly have been considered a failure. He is lazy and does not provide for his family. Not only is this disgraceful, but life-threatening as well. He is dependent on other members of the clan and must have been considered unsuccessful. Okonkwo chafes under such disgrace and his success is a consequence of his desire to be everything his father is not; society's vision of an exemplar citizen. The fact that Okonkwo is able to rise above his poverty and disgraceful paternity illustrates the Igbo's acceptance of individual free will. But Okonkwo's fate and his disharmony with his chi, family and clan are shown to cause his ultimate disgrace and death.

Achebe uses Okonkwo’s relationship with his father to show how one person can affect a person their whole life. Okonkwo’s father, Unoka, did not give Okonkwo the start in life that most of the young tribesman do, and all of the village looked down upon him. In one instance Unoka had gone to consult the Oracle of the Hills and the caves about his meager harvest during the year. As he began his story the Oracle interrupts him and declares that “You, Unoka, are known in all the clan for the weakness of your machete and your hoe. … Go home and work like a man”(Achebe 17-18). In this encounter Unoka loses some of the respect that the tribesman, and his own son had for him. (Unoka’s Death?) From the beginning Okonkwo knew he did not want to grow up like his father and worked hard to generate a prosperous future. He had to work extremely hard, would do

Okonkwo considers Nwoke to be weak, lazy and is more feminine than masculine. He feared that Nwoke will turn out to be like Unoka so, “he sought to correct him by constant nagging and beating” (11). Achebe shows that Okonkwo wants his son to be strong and fierce like him, but when this was not the case he feels that harming Nwoke will teach him. Though instead of the punishment helping Nwoke become manly, it had a negative effect on Nwoke leading him to fear and resents his father. In addition, the small relationship they had was completely broken when Nwoke finds an interest for the Christian religion. When Okonkwo hears that Nwoke is among the Christians, he gets furious and disowns his son because he does not want Nwoke to join the church . Likewise, when Obierika ask Nwoke how his father is he answers saying, “I don’t know. He is not my father” (124). This shows that instead of working out their different opinions they fought and in the end tore their relationship apart. One can not miss the reality that if Okonkwo was kind and not hurtful towards Nwoke tun he would have stayed with the Ibo culture. If this was the cause then the father and son would have had a better relationship. In the end the reader can conclude that Nwoke and Okonkwo’s relationship failed because of the actions and feelings they had for each

Father and son relationships are the most important type of relationship. Fathers heavily influence their children especially sons, thus making the relevant. In the book Things Fall Apart there are two father son relationships, Unoka and Okonkwo and Okonkwo and Nwoye. These relationships are not ideal and each father has a different relation with their son. These relationships cause many things such as loathing of one's father, and rebelling. Rebelling for the sons is not a phase, but a lifetime of rebellion. Father son relationships in the book Things Fall Apart are defined by the loathing of one’s father, causing a rebellion leading the sons to be complete opposites of their father.

Author J. S. Bryan once said, “Many men can make a fortune but very few can build a family.” This can be said of many families today and may be the reason why successful men have not-so-successful marriages. The importance of family and healthy communication is emphasized in the novel, Things Fall Apart by Chinua Achebe - ironically- by portraying the complete opposite: a fairly broken relationship and the consequences of that negative influence. The main character, Okonkwo lives his whole life obsessed with the idea of masculinity and is “dominated by fear, the fear of failure and weakness"(22). This fear was implanted into him because of his firm desire to be nothing like his father, who was seen as a shameful man who had taken no title in

“Okonkwo’s first son, Nwoye, was then twelve years but was already causing his father great anxiety for his incipient laziness”(13/2). His son reminds him so much of his father that he is causing him anxiety from his laziness as his father. “And indeed he was possessed by the fear of his father’s contemptible life and shameful death”(18/2). By the fear that his dad gave him this would’ve gave him anxiety, that one day he could possibly become like him. The way that he treats them is harshly, even, though he doesn’t show it with his father, but speaks about him harshly.

Okonkwo had a very tough childhood as he hated being the son of a lazy and improvident father, causing him to hate anything related to his father. A similar comparison can be made of his wife Ojiugo as “Okonkwo was provoked to justifiable anger by his youngest wife, who went to plait her hair at her friend’s house and did not return early enough to cook the afternoon meal”, showing that Ojiugo is just as irresponsible as Okonkwo’s father Unoka. Many comparisons can be made of Unoka to Ojiugo which has made Okonkwo resent their irresponsibility.

Okonkwo, as presented by Chinua Achebe in the novel Things Fall Apart, wished to be revered by all as a man of great wealth, power and control--the antithesis of his father. Okonkwo was driven by the need to exhibit utmost control over himself and others; he was an obsessive and insecure man.