Fear In Abusive Relationships

The fact is that it is often very difficult for an abuse victim to end the relationship. Victims stay with the batterer for many reasons, including but not limited to economic constraints, child issues, fear, and intimidation. People also assume that as soon as a victim leaves her abuser, she is safe. In reality, abuse victims are in the most danger after the relationship has ended. Another commonly accepted myth is that battering incidents are isolated behaviors. In reality, batterers use a cycle of power and control to keep their partner in the relationship. Abuse rarely happens just once. It can happen often, or only once a year, but most physical violence continues to escalate and happens more often as the relationship

Domestic violence is the most overlooked, misunderstood offense. Anyone can go through it, but many can’t endure the pain it brings. According to (www.helpguide.org), people whose partners abuse them physically and sexually are at a higher risk of being seriously injured or killed. Most people wonder why doesn’t the victim leave the relationship, well it is not that easy. “The question, ‘Why does she stay?’ is code for some people for, it’s her fault for staying,’ as if domestic violence victims intentionally choose to fall in love with men intent upon destroying us” -Leslie Morgan Steiner (www.azquotes.com).

So what makes an abuser? The goal of the abuser is power and control over their partner. Domestic violence can affect all, but more often it is the male inflicting the harm due to their physical advantage and also their societal taught dominating role. The abuser tends to conform to the stereotypical view of the man and women. The man goes out to make the money and support the family, while women stays home to cook, clean, and look after the kids. In knowing this, it is easy to understand why leaving an abusive relationship can be so difficult for the individual being abused, as leaving involves many needed changes and few solutions to the problems.

All forms of domestic abuse have one purpose: to gain and maintain control over the victim. The actual act of domestic abuse comes in many forms; aggravated assault, kidnapping, sexual abuse, forcible touching, stalking, kidnapping, sexual misconduct, and attempted murder are just to name a few. According to Amy Lehrner and Nicole Allen, domestic violence is battery as an intentional pattern of abusive behaviors by one partner against the other which results in establishing and maintaining the abuser’s power and control over the other. (Lehrner & Allen, 2008) Victims tend to stay in abusive relationships for many different reasons. Some see their abusers as powerful and believe they cannot escape, they also fear retaliation, and are often beaten or intimidating into

Toxic people have ways of pulling others willingly into unhealthy relationships without raising any obvious red flags. They know how to make the other person feel that every mishap is their fault while steering the blame away from themselves. Many people believe that those who are caught up in an abusive relationship allow themselves to be the other’s doormat, but the truth is that it happens regardless of how confident or smart the abuser’s partner is.

Some may fear retaliation. Others, having lived in an abusive relationship for years, may even have come to believe there is no alternative and may even feel that they deserve such treatment.

In the United States, domestic violence is the leading cause of injury in women between the ages of 15 and 44 (Nies & McEwen, 2015, p. 329). I have always struggled with understanding why women stay in abusive relationships. Growing up witnessing my own mother be a victim of domestic violence has made me less than empathetic for women who are in those situations and don’t do something to help themselves or their children. For as long as I can remember, I have said that if a person is in an abusive relationship and doesn’t take steps to get out of it, I have no sympathy for them. My goals for this experience were to identify at least two reasons why women stay in an abusive relationship and to identify at least two resources

“Belief that the abusive partner will change because of his remorse and promises to stop battering is a big reason why woman being abused don’t leave the abuser. Woman who are being abused stay with the abuser because that’s all they know.” (“Facts v.s Myths”).They do not know that they should leave the abuser because they believe that they deserve the abuse they are being put through. Abuse can start putting thoughts into the person being abused mind making them think that it is their fault and when that abusive partner comes home and starts yelling they automatically start to think that it is their fault.

Explanations for abusive and controlling relationships have been describe between the Stockholm syndrome and London syndrome. Stockholm syndrome and London syndrome are psychological disorders that developed due to hostage taking.

Low self-esteem can be a contributing factor when women decide to stay in abusive relationships. In many relationships where physical abuse is an issue, the victim is usually verbally abused also. The abuser uses manipulative tactics to make the victim feel worthless, useless, and too afraid to leave them. Many women have confessed that they believe it is their own fault why there are initially abused. After being brainwashed into thinking that they are ugly, disgusting, and lazy or other derogatory characteristics, verbally abused women are being almost forced to believe that if they leave the relationship that there is nobody else that would want to be with them. This unfortunate mindset leaves battered women in an extremely unhealthy and catastrophic

The reasons why women remain in abusive relationships for long periods are rather socio-cultural. Economic dependence and lack knowledge of social services to encourage and to prevent further abuse. Sometimes the inadequate reaction of competent institutions such as the police and other government departments are factors that cause women to stay in abusive environments for long periods of time. Women who received shelter, until they manage to gain their independence are less likely to return to the abuser. It is therefore important for police and referral institutions to note that the recovery from violence is a long process. Women need a period for healing, and time to gain economic, and social independence. A DV victim needs time so it is

Domestic violence and abuse are used for one purpose and one purpose. It is used to gain and maintain total control over the victim. An abuser does not play fair and it is game that they will try to win at any cost. Abusers use fear, guilt, shame, and intimidation to wear you down and the victim under his or her thumb. If more people recognized the signs of an abuser or the signs of a relationship that is in trouble, help can be sought after

Trevor Driggers once said, “Have the courage to walk away, those that value you will want you back, and those that do not won't hold you back.” One primary cause of sexual abuse is the need for control. Partners who are abusive often have a strong need to dominate the relationship. The abuser in a relationship, can be a man or a woman. Abuse does not have a certain gender, although most abusers in relationships are men. It is important to get away from an abusive relationship because it can lead to depression, one being severally hurt, and in some cases, death.

Most women can not afford to just leave their home no matter how horrible it may be. Many women in abusive relationships choose to stay because as bad as it sounds sometimes it's better to stay then live in the streets, especially if you have children. Their financial and job situation may be precarious. Many only have a stable environment because of staying with their spouse. Victims will usual not have enough credit to get an apartment by themselves. After the fact, when you and your children are financially dependent, when the abuser knows where you work, when you can't just drop everything and disappear, a restraining order is just a piece of paper that doesn't save your

Abuse can have many different meanings, there is one in particular that takes control in many Americans relationship, “physical maltreatment” (Abuse). Sadly there is an increasing amount of young adults going through an abusive relationship or were in one. Many of the people that become abusers consider violence as a normal behavior because they have witnessed it on a daily basis. They than begin to mistreat everyone that comes in his or her way. An abuser is frequently interested in controlling their victims. An abuser’s behavior is usually manipulating, in order to make their victims