First Few Years Of Marriage Essay

5. Which Fed tool do you think is most important, and why? (2-4 sentences. 1.0 points)

“Why Did I Get Married?” directed and produced by Tyler Perry is a movie based on four couples who take a reunion vacation to the Colorado Mountains in order to reunite with friends from college. On this vacation things didn’t go according to plan. Throughout the movie there was heartbreak, infidelity, suppressed feelings, conflict, and secrets raging throughout each of the couples’ relationship in some aspect. With these unfortunate events occurred at various times throughout the film it cause their trip to evolve from a place to relax, enjoy friends, and time off from work into an emotional and tense atmosphere with the involved couple seeking validation from the other couples on the reason why their marriages are the way they are. Even though the movie ended on a good note in their celebration of Janet Jackson’s character (Pat) receiving an award one of the marriages did not survive. This couple’s relationship will be my focus for this paper.

In the article “The Myth of Co-Parenting: How It Was Supposed to Be. How It Was.,” author Hope Edelman claims her husband does not put forth effort in their marriage. Edelman discusses the difficulties of parenting with a spouse who is seldom present and her misconception of marriage. In the article “My Problem With Her Anger,” author Eric Bartels claims his wife is angry with him all the time regardless of what he contributes to their family. Bartels discusses how the effort he puts forth in his marriage goes unappreciated and how he thinks his wife’s anger is negatively affecting their marriage. Bartels and Edelman both believe they entered marriage with unrealistic views resulting in dissatisfaction of marriage however, Edelman

Jody’s pride, materialism, and urge to dominant had turned him into a cold, bitter old man that was on his dying bed with kidney problems [Page 85]. This was the only time Janie had to tell him about the independence she had longed for during their marriage [Page 85]. She knows that Jody was a good husband in the aspects that he provided for her and had power. These were the things that Nanny Crawford had wanted for her. However, Janie the things she wanted which were love and independence in love. She also gained wisdom from her and Joe’s long time together. Janie did not have to leave Jody to get out of this marriage, because he died immediately after she told him all the problems she felt had been in their marriage.

In over half a century, marriage has transformed from being a social requirement to simply being an option in today’s society. What has caused this change? Many institutions in our society have changed drastically along with marriage. Although these institutions have not caused marriage to be optional, they do strongly correlate with the decreased value. The economy, education, religion, and government have all altered since the 1950s. When any institution encounters a change, all other institutions are affected. Family is a major institution in society, and I believe that marriage is an important aspect of this institution. Cohabitation, religion, women in the work world and divorce have all effected the way marriage is viewed today.

Cathy discussed how Abilify was a disaster for Kate because one major side effect was weight gain. Kate’s weight went from 105 to 152 in nine months. Kate began to development anorexia because she was so unhappy with the weight gain. Cathy discussed the strain that Kate’s OCD had on her marriage to Bruce, not only the financial strain with higher water bills and copay’s to see the psychiatrist, etc. but there was an emotional strain. Cathy and Bruce began to argue on the course of action that should be taken in treating Kate’s OCD. Cathy reports Bruce did not agree with how Kate’s doctors were treating her condition. Cathy reports Bruce wanted Kate to leave the house and to go live with another family member. Cathy refused to kick Kate out, so Cathy reported her marriage to Bruce ended due to Kate’s extreme OCD. Cathy reports that with the proper medication for Kate of Zoloft and Geodon her OCD has improved. Kate has a part time job and is getting out with friends a little more. However, Cathy did say Kate has to clean the house every Friday. Cathy and Kate will also be looking into cognitive behavior

“Marriage: any of the diverse forms of interpersonal union established in various parts of the world to form a familial bond that is recognized legally, religiously, or socially, granting the participating partners mutual conjugal rights and responsibilities… (CITATION)” In the definition of marriage there is no mention of love, yet in western civilization, love is considered the deciding factor in taking that leap. Anne Bradstreet wrote in her poem To My Dear and Loving Husband “If ever two were one, then surely we. If ever man were loved by wife, then thee; if ever wife was happy in a man, Compare with me ye women if you can (CITATION).” Even though she lived in a Puritan home, Bradshaw freely expressed her love for her husband. This expression could have been viewed as just as radical as homosexual marriage is today. One of the biggest phrases people supporting the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, LGBT, movement use is, “Love is love.” People associated with this movement also ask heterosexuals what they would do if marriage was not allowed to them. Yet the Hindi philosophy says that one marries, and then falls in love. Is the reason America is in such turmoil over the various types of marriage in comparison to other countries because this country loves first, and marries second? If love were taken out of the business deal that marriage essentially is, would America be in less turmoil? America as a country would be better economically and socially if marriage was not

Berry says that Mary has been having this issue for some time now but her family has recently sought out counseling to help Mary want to talk with her family about what’s bothering her rather than trying to handle things by herself. The whole family attends the sessions to help Mary with her self-esteem. So far, the counseling has been working, Mary has gotten better at discussing her feelings with the family. Berry’s brother is 40 years old and owns his own graphic design business. His name is David. Berry reports that she and her brother are not close. This is because he wasn’t around much when Berry was growing up. David is from her mom’s first marriage and lived with his dad. He had a hard time transition to having Berry’s dad as a step-father along with having his own dad. He didn’t spend as much time with Berry, her mom and dad, which bothered Berry when she was younger. When David graduated college, he moved to Florida and got married. Since moving to Florida, he hasn’t maintained a strong relationship with his family. He has a wife and 5 kids. The only contact he is with the family is if his wife calls to let them know how things

" She begins to go mad and cries, his control of her life depresses her. It is through the situation itself that the one can infer the marriage and domestic life don’t seem so satisfying for her. She feels as though a chance for individuality would support her growth as a person, "It is so discouraging not to have any advice and companionship about my work" (60) but that would not fit in with the expectation that as a

I interviewed John and Cindy about their marriage and the challenges they’ve faced together as a married couple. I am encouraged by their relationship and have decided to use their relationship as a model for my second interview. John and Cindy have been married for almost 5 years. In addition to this union, there is McKenna, Cindy’s son. They are a blended family, of course, and are part of the more modern structure of families in our society.

In December of 2008, my wife and I found out we would be having our fourth child. We were living in Sugarloaf Key, FL while I worked in Key West, FL. Due to some unforeseen circumstances with our landlord, we terminated our lease in Sugarloaf early, rather than finding a place for the remaining six months we would be there. We moved the family back home to North Carolina over the Christmas break from school. I still had six months or so remaining before I transferred to my new job in Tybee Island, GA. The military had moved us before, being a military family moving was a bitter-sweet occurrence. The family adjusted well and settled right in. Having family close by to help ease this transition helped out greatly. The fourth addition to our family was developing on schedule, regular doctor visits, and checkups. We decided that he would be born in NC since my wife was comfortable with the doctor she was already seeing. The estimated delivery date also worked with my work schedule and being home for the birth.

A domestic partnership is an interpersonal relationship between two individuals who live together and share a common domestic life but are not married (to each other or to anyone else). The term is not used consistently, which results in some inter-jurisdictional confusion. Some jurisdictions, such as Australia, New Zealand, and the American states of Oregon, Washington (only available if one of the parties is 62 or older), Nevada, Wisconsin, Maine, and California, use the term "Domestic Partnership" to mean what other jurisdictions call Civil Union, Civil Partnership, or Registered Partnership. Other jurisdictions use the term as it was originally coined, to mean an interpersonal status created by local municipal and county governments, which

Nowadays, the pre-martial cohabitation concept has been widely used across many places. The current generation tends to cohabit outside of marriage at least once in their lifetime.

together in the early 1980's were between 25 and 34 years old, and an additional

Marriage is the socially recognized union of two or more people. Selecting a marriage partner is very much a culturally defined process. The rules governing selection vary widely from society to society and are more often complex. How would you go about selecting a mate? Where would you begin? What criteria would you use? When we look around the world to see how other societies deal with these questions, it is clear that the ways of selecting a mate or a marriage partner has been changed from generation to generation.