Forgiveness Interventions

As I was reading the chapter on forgiveness in Psychology, Theology, and Spirituality in Christian Counseling by McMinn (2011), the personal life experience that jumped out to me was when I had to make the decision to truly forgive my ex-boyfriend and his parents for the emotional pain they caused me. After living in New Jersey for a month and spending time with my boyfriend and his family, working, and taking care of an elderly lady with dementia my world came crashing down on me. My ex-boyfriend’s parents discovered sin in his life and told me I could no longer pursue a relationship with him because of the sins he had committed. After finding out the sinful things my ex-boyfriend had done, I chose to forgive him. I also chose to give him a second chance at a relationship with me, but my effort to salvage our relationship was futile.

Forgiveness have important medicinal effect on health. Researchers and study have shown that people who forgive have less chances of health issues like heart attack and brain tumor. “People who hold tolerance views of human nature and don’t seem to nurse grieveness unduly tend to have blood pressures in the normal range” (Callwood, J. 2007, p. 153). Writer in the above findings tells her readers the medicinal effect of tolerance. She beautifully explains the positive effect of forgiveness in contrast with unforgiveness where her contrasting finding says “Unforgiving people, some studies show, are three times more likely to have heart diseases as people who don’t carry grudges”(Callwood, J. 2007, p.153). Writer here is addressed to people who cannot or do not forgive and tells them how harmful holding grudges are to their health. She beautifully explains the finding by telling first the negative effect of not forgiving in comparison to

Thematic Statement: Forgiving someone for their mistake can make yourself free of anger and bitterness.

Without forgiveness, relationships will not last. Everyone makes mistakes. “Each of us is hurt, defended, flawed, and will inevitably make mistakes. Having this perspective doesn’t mean we should sit back and withstand abuse. However, if we want to enjoy a lasting relationship with someone we value and choose to spend our lives with, we may want to grow our ability to forgive” (Firestone). Self forgiveness is also necessary for complete fulfillment in life. In the short story, The Outcast of Poker Flat, the characters had all sinned and were discarded from the city by the townsfolk. During the journey to start a new life, the characters learned to trust and love one another. Forgiveness is given to each other and they even learn to forgive themselves. “And when pitying fingers brushed the snow from their wan faces, you could scarcely have told from the equal peace that dwelt upon them which was she that had sinned” (Harte). In the end, forgiveness had given the characters peace. Relationships require forgiveness to thrive and survive. Even in time of peril, the characters found peace in forgiveness. The relationships that were built on the short journey comforted the characters at the end and the sorrow of death was solaced by the forgiveness they had

The recovery model is very import to the field of marriage and family therapy in many different ways. Recovery allows for the client to change, and see unlimited possibility. This model is seen through the lens of values, seeking to help the client to live a rich and meaningful life. Recovery is strength based, and allows for the client to build from their personal skills set, and doesn’t blame a single person for the distress of the family. This allows for the client to gain a sense of self and self-worth, see their own values, and be able to create support within the family as well as their community.

Elements covered in this graduate student’s first critique of Effects of Forgiveness Therapy on Anger, Mood, and Vulnerability to Substance Use Among Inpatient Substance-Dependent Clients (Lin, Mack, Enright, Krahn, and Baskin, 2004) encompassed a compendium of its subject matter along with an evaluation of its first three components (e.g., abstract, literature review and research hypothesis). In its sequel, an analysis of the study’s participants along with an inspection of its procedure and instrumentation was offered. Within the third and final segment of this critique however, readers will find: (1) a scrutinization of

It conveys purpose and selflessness as paramount to this growth. This unit closes with couples in distress and the crisis they face. It explains that addiction, infidelity, and major losses are some of the most common difficulties couples face. Recognizing unstable patterns and realizing when referral is necessary are covered here.

Rowe, C. L., & Liddle, H. A. (January 01, 2003). SUBSTANCE ABUSE. Journal of Marital

Hebl and Enright (1993) conducted a study on elderly females who had suffered from various injusticies such as spousal conflict and overmedication to show forgiveness can be induced and with therapeutic goals. Further findings come from Coyle and Enright (1997) who used a forgiveness intervention on males who had been hurt by a partners abortion who found forgiveness lead to reductions in anger, anxiety and grief, therefore forgiving does have a positive effect on mental health. A second study by Al-Mabuk, Enright and Cardis (1995) on students who had been love deprived. In an experimental group where the students went through seventeen steps of the process model had decreased anxiety and improved their attitude towards their mother/father

This process can position the communication process for exoneration and forgiveness which give a high probability in re-establishing a balance relationship. Establishing relational truth and constructive entitlement which is guided by the therapist, the wrongdoer within the family system can give insight to show evident of the hurt he/she has caused. This can lead the wrongdoer to the process of relational trust moving to a level of restoration and mending the broken relationship (Mauldin, & Anderson, 1998).

Enright and Reed’s (2006) article confirms that forgiveness is extremely important because it brings positive change from negative experiences. Forgiveness therapy does not mean that a person has to forget the abuse they experienced. It does not even mean that the person is looking to build a better relationship with the person that abused him or her but it does mean that the person has made a moral decision to have an attitude of benevolence which will improve all of the negative outcomes of the abuse. Accepting the fact that I have been done wrong and realizing that I cannot change what has already occurred leads me to only want to make sure the situation or a similar situation does not happen again. Choosing to forgive and let go of anger makes room for joy and cheerfulness.

This client was Christian and from my estimation now looking back was just beginning their walk with Christ and not on the same maturity level that I was at that time in my walk with Christ. At that time I knew how forgiveness first and foremost is obedience to God, and secondly how it can set you free from so many emotional problems, McMinn said, “Forgiveness, in its theological and spiritual context, is profound, life-giving, and transforming. When we remove the religious context and think of forgiveness only as a clinical technique, we risk losing the essence of forgiveness.” (2011, p. 254) After reading this chapter it made me re-live an area in which I was not fully equipped to help client maneuver their way through. This particular chapter has allowed me to see how vital forgiveness is in a therapeutic session, and how it must be used carefully. It is made me aware of how important my Christianity is to forgiveness, but also to assess the level my client is currently on before beginning a session on forgiveness. Reflection

When reading the titles and abstracts for the journal articles, my attention was drawn to the articles on forgiveness. I am divorced for more than 10 years. My first marriage was extremely painful for me near the end. I was never physically abused and until recently did not title what I experienced as emotional abuse. In retrospect, that is exactly what I had endured. I allowed myself to continue to be victimized until I found a Christian counselor who helped me focus on healing. I recently did my weeklong portion of my intensive for COUN 505 and it brought up some of the old emotions from the

The general topic of forgiveness has received a magnitude of attention and research on a conceptual level in recent years. Hall and Fincham consistently noted, however, that self-forgiveness had little to no empirical study or research documented and believe this is a critical piece to an individual’s overall emotional health. In an effort to stimulate additional research on the

The article, “The Effects of Forgiveness Therapy on Depression, Anxiety, and Posttraumatic Stress for Women after Spousal Emotional Abuse”, by Gayle L. Reed and Robert D. Enright, is a research study about the effects of forgiveness therapy. The study compared forgiveness therapy with alternative treatments, such as anger validation, assertiveness, and interpersonal skills, to provide an efficient treatment for emotional abused women.