Furthest From the Truth

1024 WordsJul 8, 20185 Pages
I was five years old and in kindergarten. At the time I was living in my hometown of Perry, Utah, attending Willard Elementary School which is located ten minutes south of my house. It was a day just like any other, or so I thought. A few hours into school, I found myself sitting all alone in the corner of the double-sized classroom between two book shelves. Listening to the rest of my classmates playing on the other side of the room, I buried my focus into a set of Lego-like blocks. As I recall, they were dull yellow in color and worn down from the constant use of sixty hyperactive kindergarten students. As our much-too-short recess came to an end, I decided, without thinking twice, that it would be a brilliant idea to put four of…show more content…
Everything I did was, somehow, intertwined with lying and stealing, everything from school, work, relationships, and what have you. What upsets me now is the fact that I could so easily lie to someone's face, despite who it was. and not think twice while I sat in a fit of anger when I found out they had lied to me. Meanwhile my expectations for other people were astoundingly lopsided. The right to be two-faced and get away with it was mine and mine alone. Under no circumstance was another allowed to express the same behaviors that I had. Even though I was one of the most untrustworthy people I had the honor of knowing, I had also developed severe trust issues with other people. All of the instances which led to this were surrounded by the same things I had done to them--dishonesty, disrespect, and backstabbing. I found myself isolating from the world, and retreating to the safety of my own head. I thought is was the only thing I could ever trust, but in actuality it was the furthest thing from the truth. Just like I had been actively participating in these behaviors for a long time, it took a long time and a lot of work to finally get to a point where they are no longer that much of an issue. It took me ten months, moving to a new state, meeting new people, lots of therapy, very deep self reflection, and practice to be able to say that I am now an honest person. It took a great deal of

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