Goodbye Letter

This is not a single day when I haven’t thought about you. You are most genuinely kind, intelligent person I’ve ever met. You have always been there for me. You always fill me with happiness. In return, I promise I’ll always be by your side and to support you for the rest of my life. I am very happy to see this friendship grows as we become closer everyday over the last six years. I wanted to tell you sooner, but I am afraid to hurt our friendship in exchange for love – we can do both. I don’t know if you feel the same way I do. That’s okay if you don’t but I showed my courage to tell you I will always love you. Can’t wait to see you soon on Thanksgiving and to tell you all wonderful

Thank you for letting my go, for finally ending the pain you knew I had always felt when it came to loving you. I hope you were aware of how difficult it was for me to give you the type of love you so heavily demanded. I was only destroying myself, tearing my soul apart, piece by piece, just to put a smile on your face. Thank you for finally realizing that you have to work on yourself first. I am not and never was capable of doing that for you—no one else is. It was about time you'd decided to end the nights spent crying and the days spent fighting.

Hi... I've been trying so hard to respect that you needed some space but I just can't not talk to you any longer. I understand if you no longer want anything to do with me or if you even want to talk to me but I just want to let you know how sorry I am and how ashamed of myself I am for hurting you the way I did. You are what I loved most in this world and I ruined it. I am so sorry for lying to you and making you feel the way you did. I am also so so sorry if I ruined your week with you're family. I pray I didn't. You probably dont think I do but I love you so much Ellie and I always will. I really want to fix things, I'm willing to do anything in my power to fix things I just need to know whether or not you want me to because I will understand

I’m sorry. I just miss you and want you to know that I love you very much.

I’m really getting annoyed that this situation is going the way it is . . . Your life is NOT going to end. You’ll move on and I’ll move on. But, apparently, you don’t respect my decision . . . I NEVER wanted to end this like this, so hostile and cold . . . Hate me if you will. But you should remember that I could never hate you.

I loved you more than I loved myself. Not even, I was in love with you, and you broke my heart by breaking it off between us without even blinking an eye. When I called you on the phone a couple hours later, you sounded like you absolutely hated me, and that hurt even more. (Don’t get me wrong, though. I’m not trying to sound like a victim. I’m sure you hurt or were hurting too.) We used to talk just about everyday for the past year or so. Not talking to you everyday is so strange. I don’t know what to do with myself half the time. Whenever something happens - whether good or bad - and want to run to tell you about it. I didn’t only lose my boyfriend, I also lost my real best friend, and my first real, true love. I really thought you were the one. After all, we were talking about going on a mini vacation by ourselves in the summer. You were supposed to come to my Abuela’s wedding and spend your 20th birthday with

While I was a lost boy in a dream world, that was only filled of you and me together. I know you saw this. Ill still have a dream world but I want it to be one we both create together, I know you have a brilliant mind. You will always light me up like the sun. Thats the best dream world I can possibly imagine and it basically makes me cry like a kid, because I only bring out the best in me. I know its probably odd being the center of my universe or a heavy burden.. but don't let it be, its pretty simple in my head and my love for you is unconditional and always will be, the good and the bad. I've only held you the closest to me above all others always, because you are my heart.

I made the worst bad decision a girl could ever make and now you hate me. I know that. I also know that you could never forgive me. It makes me think. Was it really worth losing my best friend? Was it worth abandoning a friendship that lasted eight years? I wish you would just listen, Oliver. Can you really blame me for this? You were the initiator. You asked for it. Now you won’t even look at me. I don’t understand why you can’t just move on. I know you think I betrayed you and I know that you are ignoring me. In reality, all I did was do what you wanted. I miss you, Oliver. I know that you just want everything to go back to how it was, but it can’t. It will never be the same, especially with your illness. Change is a part of life

People constantly let me down. I constantly let myself down. I have been like trump and built a wall around my life. You on the other hand have a superpower no other person has. You can phase through walls, and you have mine. You're the only person I trust to not let me down. I want to keep you that way. I don’t want to take away that superpower or I will be all alone inside my walls. Your different Ashleigh. I am getting all mad about the smallest things because around this time is when I have been starting to get cheated on. So I am paranoid that I am going to lose you like I lose everything else. I don’t try to get worked up, it is just my inner self telling me “Hey! Remember that thing that happened around this time in your relationship. Yeah, it might be happening again.” But everytime that happens, you just walk through those walls and make everything better. You make me a better person. Instead of having those walls maybe you can help me build a window and a door and stuff so I can start to open up again. I want you to be the person to do that, and you have those

It has been nearly a year since we started talking again after years of no communication. Words do not suffice to express how much I truly love you, and how grateful I am that you entered my life. You have been one of my biggest supports, you have believed in me when I felt that no one did, you have given me your all: your love, your time, your energy, your lost hours of sleep, your tears, your laughs. To this day, whenever I am in doubt, you have always cheered me on and made me believe that I can do anything, that I don’t have any limitations, and that has changed my life; you have changed my life. I never thought you would come to hold such high value in my heart, but I am glad you did, and all the time has been worthwhile. I like to think that I do not have a heart, that I am apathetic, but there are two factors outside of family that say otherwise: my love for children, and you.

Thank you for being so appreciative and letting me know you appreciate it when I make you a drink or remind you of a call to make or an errand to run. It shows me you do not expect things of me and makes me want to be the same with you.

I had a great time with you during this last year and half. I will always remember the very first time we met in the engineering lab, the very first time my lips touched your lips when you asked me if you can kiss me and we kissed, the very first time you hugged me, the first time when we made love. Your smile your way of looking at me will always be fresh in my memories. Spending time with you and doing things together was the best part about this relationship.

Yeah, I don’t really know what I am doing with myself anymore. When we started dating I was confused and scared. I pushed you away. I know and I feel horrible about it. I didn’t mean to but I just didn’t know how to express my feelings for you and I don’t do well with embarrassment or compliments. And It’s easy for me to get embarrassed when someone I like says something nice to me or about me. Later on I heard that you had done some unfavorable things to people I was close to and I became conflicted. Then my friend told me that he wished for me to break up with you. We talk often about me breaking up with you. People thought that I didn’t really love you, to be honest I wasn’t really sure if I loved you. Then thanksgiving came around and I couldn’t see you or talk to you everyday, so I wished to see you everyday. Though that didn’t come through because I ignored you. Though it wasn’t intentional at first as time passed I was afraid of answering you because I didn’t know what to say. I stopped talking because you insisted on buying me a Christmas gift. Which is a nice gesture but I didn’t want you to buy me anything because I was fine with just having you. The last day we were together Jaden said you were upset with me and I understood why I mean I did ignore you that that hurt you so much. But when you said you would ignore me the rest of the day it made me really upset, Instead of being mature and ignoring that comment since I knew you weren’t going to

And I think causing another stir will only make me and you loose credibility and respect. I am sad, but I don’t want anger words to be shown as my story. He was a good man, we had plans, we had a future. But things happened and now it’s all changed. And I’ll just have to adapt.”