Graduation Speech Essay

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For some of you graduates, this will be the last ceremony you might ever sit through. Most of us, though, and I regret that I am in this group, will sit through many more ceremonies -- ceremonies longer and more tedious that this or anything else you can imagine. If you think this is bad, try a college graduation. Think, that is, attend a wedding. And, if just for a moment you think that that is bad, just be thankful you have never attended or will attend a Bar Mitzvah. The only ceremony I think anybody would truly enjoy attending is a funeral. But, only if you are lucky enough, or unlucky enough, to be the guest of honor, because, really, that will be the only time you will be able to be honored at a ceremony and not have to make chit…show more content…
What I did, was grab a random book off my book shelf. Then I chose a random page from that randomly chosen book. And then, I chose a random sentence, from that randomly chosen page, from that randomly chosen book. The results were interesting, if not remarkable. I think it's a great theme and so let me share. My book was Emily Bronte's "Wuthering Heights," my page was page 10, chapter two. My quote, and as of now, theme for my speech, is: "My neighbor struck me as bordering on repulsive, I knew, through experience, that I was tolerably attractive." Wow! I think that, that is one great theme. It works. (Pull out pocket mirror) I am tolerably attractive. As for my neighbor. Well, you be the judge. Really, what are the chances of two attractive people sitting next to each other. Not likely. Why not try it yourselves. Visualize yourself, or if you have access to a mirror, look at yourself. Alluring huh? I bet you have to admit, you're tolerably attractive. Who are you kidding? You are foxy. You are a fox. If you were a Quentin Tarantino movie, you would be Foxy Brown. Now tear yourself away from your own adorable self and turn to your right. See that person. Pretty appalling. If it's a man, he's not very handsome is he? If it's a woman, not very pretty is she? And if you cannot tell what sex it is? Well I have got three words: Re-Pug-Nant. See, this is not just a theme for my speech, it is a rule for life. You

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