Grieving Styles In Ordinary People

Kubler-Ross, E and Kessler, D (2005). On Grief and Grieving, London: Simon & Schuster. p7-28.

The Two-Track Model of Bereavement is a model that states loss is conceptualized along two axes. Track I pertains to the biopsychosocial functioning in the event of a loss and Track II pertains to the bereaved’s continued emotional attachment and relationship to whoever is deceased. The effect of Track I is seen through the bereaved’s functioning, including their anxiety, their self-esteem and self-worth, and their depressive affect and cognitions. Noting the ability of one to invest in life tasks after experiencing a loss indicates how they are responding to the loss of the deceased. This Track is seen as an expression similar to one of trauma, or crisis. Track II holds that the bereaved has difficulty physically separating from the deceased. This can be seen in emotional, interpersonal, or cognitive ways. It is shown through imagery and memories that the bereaved experiences surrounding the deceased, whether positive or negative, as well as the emotional distance from them. These pictures in the bereaved’s head explain both the cognitive and emotional view of the person who has died (Rubin, 1999).

The life transition of death and dying is inevitably one with which we will all be faced; we will all experience the death of people we hold close throughout our lifetime. This paper will explore the different processes of grief including the bereavement, mourning, and sorrow individuals go through after losing someone to death. Bereavement is a period of adaptation following a life changing loss. This period encompasses mourning, which includes behaviors and rituals following a death, and the wide range of emotions that go with it. Sorrow is the state of ongoing sadness not overcome in the grieving process; though not pathological, persistent

Loss is a phenomenon that is experienced by all. Death is experienced by family members as a unique and elevated form of loss which is modulated by potent stages of grief. Inevitably, everyone will lose someone with whom they had a personal relationship and emotional connection and thus experience an aftermath that can generally be described as grief. Although bereavement, which is defined as a state of sorrow over the death or departure of a loved one, is a universal experience it varies widely across gender, age, and circumstance (definitions.net, 2015). Indeed the formalities and phases associated with bereavement have been recounted and theorized in literature for years. These philosophies are quite diverse but

The stages of grief are demonstrated in Conrad’s relationships with his family and friends. Conrad has experienced depression and a suicide attempt in response to his brother’s death. At the beginning of the book, Conrad is going through the first stage of grief, which is shock and denial. Conrad’s father, Cal, worries about Conrad’s mental health and gives him the name of a therapist. However, Conrad does not call him. Cal believes that Conrad, “ ought to stick with the plan --’” (13) However, Conrad “can’t [because he] is swimming every night…[He doesn’t] need to see anybody. [He] feels fine’ (13). Conrad is uncomfortable talking about the death, and seeing a therapist would require him to talk. Conrad is afraid to feel his emotions. He thinks if he just avoids thinking about his brother’s death, he will be okay. The second

Grief and loss are one of the most universal human experiences, though painful, and understandably causes distress. However, approximately 15 % experience a more problematic grieving process with elevated symptoms of depression and/or posttraumatic stress symptoms (Bonanno and Kaltman, 1999).There is no well-established model of the timeline for resolution of grief and the variance of its expression is wide. Many persons cope with the emotional pain of bereavement without any formal intervention. However, individuals who have experienced traumatic bereavement, such as deaths that are sudden, violent, or due to human actions (Green 2000), may face particular challenges. Researchers have tried to define a model for the treatment of traumatic bereavement that fully supports not only the client, but also those working with the clients around their trauma

Though Doka originally designated four elements, in depicting disenfranchised grief in nurses, Mortell (2015) labeled five features. Individuals are prone to experiencing this type of grief when a relationship is not acknowledged, the loss is unrecognized, there is exclusion from grieving rituals, the particular circumstances under which death occurs, and how the individual expresses his or her grief (Mortell, 2015). One must realize that society is governed by norms across all levels and these standards extend to delineating acceptable, meaningful relationships, thus when one endures a loss of a relationship outside of those deemed

Additionally, the women compare this grieving to the mourning process when their partner dies. Moreover, when their spouse passes away, not only are they morning a death, but they are learning how to transition into providing for their family (Sakarida, 2015).

Grieving is an important part of life that everyone goes through because it can ultimately make you a better person. The texts “Ordinary People” by Judith Guest , “Annabel Lee” by Edgar Allan Poe, and “The Raven” by Edgar Allan Poe all support this theme. Throughout the novel “Ordinary People”, Conrad Jarrett, the main character, is mourning the loss of his older brother Jordan “Buck” Jarrett who died in a tragic boating accident. During his time of grieving, Conrad attempts suicide.

"’Tis not alone my inky cloak, good mother, / nor customary suits of solemn black / [ . . . ] but I have that within which passeth show; / these but the trappings and the suits of woe” (Shakespeare 1.2.76-73, 85-86) says Hamlet when confronted about his way of grieving over his father’s recent death. Shakespeare’s play Hamlet is a remarkable tale that is centered on the idea of death and grief. While death is a universal occurrence, meaning every person will deal with it, how we grieve after a loss is completely individual. To look at a formula of grief, most turn to the five stages of grief developed by Elizabeth Kubler-Ross, a psychiatrist, who studied the topic in her book On Death and Dying. This model consists of denial, anger,

Men in out society are referred to as tough, emotionless, strong and dependable. Often a man that cries is perceived as soft and weak; therefore we may be led to believe that men do not have a problem. However, this statement is incorrect. Men who are “tough” and do not cry as a response to grief are actually the men we should be most worried about because they tend to bottle up their emotions. Masculine patterns of coping with grief are different but not less effective than the more conventional or feminine ways of dealing with a loss (Doka, K. J., & Martin, T. L., 2010). The use of the word masculine response to grief is not always the most proper term. Some women respond in the same way as men when responding to grief and men sometimes responds

Death and dying is a natural and unavoidable process that all living creatures will experience at some point in life, whether it is one’s own person death or the death of a close friend or family member. Along with the experience of death comes the process of grieving which is the dealing and coping with the loss of the loved one. Any living thing can grieve and relate to a loss, even children (Shortle, Young, & Williams, 1993). “Childhood grief and mourning of family and friends may have immediate and long-lasting consequences including depression, anxiety, social withdrawal, behavioral disturbances, and school underachievement” (Kaufman & Kaufman, 2006, p. 61). American children today grow up in cultures that attempt to avoid grief and

Grief is the act following the loss of a loved one. While grief and bereavement are normal occurrences, the grief process is a social construct of how someone should behave. The acceptable ways that people grieve change because of this construct. For a time it was not acceptable to grieve; today, however, it is seen as a necessary way to move on from death (Scheid, 2011).The grief process has been described as a multistage event, with each stage lasting for a suggested amount of time to be considered “normal” and reach resolution. The beginning stage of grief is the immediate shock, disbelief, and denial lasting from hours to weeks (Wambach, 1985). The middle stage is the acute mourning phase that can include somatic and emotional turmoil. This stage includes acknowledging the event and processing it on various levels, both mentally and physically. The final stage is a period of

“Ordinary people” everywhere are faced day after day with the ever so common tragedy of losing a loved one. As we all know death is inevitable. We live with this harsh reality in the back of our mind’s eye. Only when we are shoved in the depths of despair can we truly understand the multitude of emotions brought forth. Although people may try to be empathetic, no one can truly grasp the rawness felt inside of a shattered heart until death has knocked at their door. We live in an environment where death is invisible and denied, yet we have become desensitized to it. These inconsistencies appear in the extent to which families are personally affected by death—whether they

Pain. A feeling that most of us hate even to experience in life. It is an essential component that we feel when we get hurt physically or mentally. The more we experience it, the more we grow stronger in future. Physical pain is what we feel outside; it is temporary and we learn from it, but what happens when that pain is caused in your heart? What happens when that pain takes the form of grief? What happens when that pain breaks you into a million pieces like a shattered mirror? Perhaps, this pain can not be expressed in proper words. There are perhaps no proper words to describe this pain, at least none used on this planet. This intolerable pain which tears you apart becomes so overwhelming and unbearable that it taints your entire life. But grief—grief doesn’t run to my schedule, it has an agenda of its own, like a desire which doesn’t go with the way. Some say it comes in waves, but that would suggest a rhythm one can predict, like the rising and falling of tides. I feel no rhythm in my grief, but I do live in a slow-motion pace inside a bubble from which I see my altered world.