How Do Men And Women 's Need For Intimacy?

The typical stereotypes of communication are that women talk more than men, that is not necessarily true. For example, Tannen states, “...another explanation is that men think women talk to much because they hear women talking in situations where men would not: on the telephone; or in social situations with friends, when they are not discussing topics that men find inherently interesting, or; like the couple at the women’s group, at home alone-in other words, in private speaking” (Cooper and MacDonald 11). Men and women have two different conversational styles, different ways of talking. They also have different ideas of what is important and what is not. For example, Tannen points out that the man thought it wasn’t important that his friend was getting married, but the woman had thought that it was important (Cooper and MacDonald 12).

The first difference is how they listen to people talking. Women love to make “listener noises such as ‘mhm,’ ‘uhuh,’ and ‘yeah.’” They do this to show “I’m with you” (Tannen332). On the other hand, men listen in silence. When men are silent it usually is because they are trying to interpret the information. Another reason for a men’s silence is when they go into their “cave” because they are upset or stressed. Women misinterpret a man’s silence and they imagine horrible things such as “he hates me, he doesn’t love me, he is leaving me forever.” A women’s silence means what she’s about to say is going to hurt them or she doesn’t want to talk to them. If they can realize they have different ways of communicating then there wouldn’t be many worries or

The article traces the origins of this phenomenon to childhood, where young boys and young girls tend to play exclusively within their own gender. Children's development is most influenced by the social structure of peer interactions. The differences in childhood socialization result in a lack of understanding of the communication styles of the sexes. Boys and girls bond differently.

In her essay, "But What Do You Mean?" Deborah Tannen discusses how men and women 's conversation styles differ in how they communicate with one another. The problem is that men and women have different perspectives. Tannen explains that the "conversation rituals" among women are designed to be polite and sensitive to others, while the "conversation rituals" among men are designed to maintain superiority (328). Tannen explores seven ways in which men and women miscommunicate : apologies, criticism, thank-yous, fighting, praise, complaints, and jokes. Being no fault of either party, conversation strategies between men and women are just naturally different, these miscommunications can make conversation awkward and sometimes can be misunderstood.

How one communicates is also influenced by gender. Studies show that ones sex can place a person in a gender role expectation. Women and Men communicate differently and because sexual identity is defined through same sex parent or role model, women and men can get into gender role expectations. These expectations influence their perception attitudes and behavior that will result in a communication style. This early self-concept can effect each one's interpersonal relations. Women for instance are much-attached human beings they have very early identification with their mothers, and this can cause an on going pattern of role expectation. It can lead to interpersonal communication skills that are very nurturing and understanding. Women are not threatened by intimacy and communicating at a close range with people. Similarly, men also have an early identification process not with their mother, but their fathers. Men tend to be fairly reserved, and quite. Men are most comfortable when there is a level of separation. This male role will contribute to the communication processes and it can cause communication to

From "You just don't understand: Women and men in conversation", Deborah Tannen shows the gender differences in conversation. The main idea is that women value relationship and empathy within a group, while men are struggling to raise their status and class. According to Deborah Tannen, this affects how they think and speak. Generally, men talk more in a public situation, while women talk more in private settings. Most women tend to use rapport talk for conversation, "a way of establishing connections and negotiating relationships," whereas most men tend to use report talk, "a way of preserving independence and maintain status in hierarchical social order"(Deborah Tannen, You just don't understand: Women and men in conversation) There are different understandings between gender about what conversation is for. To him, talk is information, which is used to inform what he needs to know or what he wants other to know. To her, however, talk is for interaction, a way to show involvement, whereas listening is a way of caring. Therefore, in public events, men are more comfortable to claim attention with this understanding of talking.

Male and female differ in their use of communication because their reasons for communicating are different. Men

As in many other gender differences, miscommunication between males and females can be explained by either the biological aspect or the cultural/environmental aspect. Deborah Tannen, a University professor of linguistics at Georgetown University and an Author, suggests the biological explanation to

Communication between males and females has always been somewhat complicated. Because we are arguing that males and females have different cultures we wanted to take a look at what some of these differences might be. According to our research the inherent differences between male and female culture are the different roles that society holds for them and the ways these roles lead to different communication styles. The stereotypes that men and women grow up with affect the types of ways in which they communicate. We first wanted to take a look at how they specifically differ while men and women are arguing or having normal conversations. We also looked at the different types of networks that men and women

There exists a disparity in the communication phenomenon between men and women. This disparity according to scholars can be attributed to the male dominance in the society today and relationship tensions between couples. A study on cross-sex conversations showed that, when men and women engage in a friendly conversation, they do so as equals but they do not play the same roles in the communication. Women tend to ask more questions and likely to utter utterances that encourage responses from the other speaker. Men, on the other hand, are more likely to interrupt their partner’s conversations and make direct opinions and facts to control or dominate the conversation. Thus, the communication phenomenon between men and women is strikingly distinct.

How one communicates is also influenced by gender. Studies show that ones sex can place a person in a gender role expectation. Women and Men communicate differently and because sexual identity is defined through same sex parent or role model, women and men can get into gender role expectations. These expectations influence their perception attitudes and behavior that will result in a communication style. This early self-concept can effect each one's interpersonal relations. Women for instance are much-attached human beings they have very early identification with their mothers, and this can cause an on going pattern of role expectation. It can lead to interpersonal

Deborah Tannen is the author of the book You Just Don't Understand where she analyzes the different meanings of communication between men and women. Her research shows that women and men use the same words and phrases and yet can interpret and react to those same words and phrases differently. Tannen compares the two sexes to find men use their conversation as a type of competition or to preserve their independence. For example, men talk about their knowledge regarding sports, cars, women, exc. Meanwhile, women try to foster intimacy through communication. For instance, women often talk and relate on a personal level. Throughout Tannen's book she uses "cross-cultural communication" to describe the differences between the language of

It is a well-known fact that men and women have vastly different styles of nearly everything, communication not excluded. Women tend to be more talkative and emotional whereas men are usually reserved and not quite as open with their emotions. Many differences indeed exist between the spoken language of males and females. What about body language? Nonverbal cues are often difficult to notice and even harder to understand. Some people may not even realize when they are communicating in this sense. Like the spoken word, nonverbal communication usually varies between males and females, depending on relationships, environments, and circumstances. Learning why different genders communicate in this manner, the various ways in which they do this,

According to Deborah Tannen, a linguistic professor of Georgetown University, men and women talk differently and sometimes it might be very complex as she stated that many coupes 'grew in diverse cultures.' Men consider communication as a primary language of 'report.' They feel more

In the article “Talk in the Intimate Relationship: His and Hers” by Deborah Tannen, you will begin to see and discover the differences in conversation between men and women. Discussed throughout this paper are the importance of metamessages, an overview of Tannen’s article, whether Tannen is fair in her article toward both men and women and whether I agree with Tannen’s article as well as experiences of my peer’s and myself.