Humorous Wedding Speech

Welcome, everyone. I believe, that as father of the bride, it is my dubious privilege to make the first speech, so, here's one I prepared earlier.

Legacy: I would like to thank all of my family, friends, teachers, and coaches who have supported me throughout high school. I would like to Kip and Julie Johnson, my parents. Thank you for everything that you have done for me. No matter how hard I was on you guys, you never gave up on me. You always knew that I could do better and constantly encouraged me to do so. I would also like to say a special thanks to my girlfriend Bekka. You have always been there for me since the 9th grade when we started dating. You always helped me with any of my work that I had sturggled with. I appreciate you always telling me that I could do better, even though I was lazy. Thank you for always supporting me, love. I would next like to thank all my friends: Tyler, Hugo, Ed, Casey, Tristan, James,

Hello, everybody! Merry Christmas! Mele Kalikimaka! Happy New Year! Happy Hanukkah! We just want to -- hope you guys are having a great holiday. And it is wonderful to see all of you.

Ladies and gentlemen, may I start my speech by welcoming the guests. Today, we are surrounded by most of the friends and family that have been important to us during our lives. Some have traveled thousands of miles, just to be here today. We welcome you all and thank you sincerely for sharing this special day with us.

His eyes were glued to the remote dimple on the side of her cheek. It was his way of containing the boyish grin that illuminated his face when she spoke. He stared adoringly, until Jinora's hand found the top of his. Kai stepped forward and he took a fortifying breath.

Good morning baby! I just wanted to give you something cute to wake up to, so here i am. I really hope that this will be able to put a smile on that cute face of yours. You are so unbelievably caring and kind and just flat out amazing. You deserve so much more than what you actually receive but then again, you are so young and you have such an amazing life ahead of you and hopefully, i will be able to see it as well. You just need to keep doing what you love and no matter what happens or whatever it may be, i’ll always be here for you. Not a day that passes by that i don’t feel blessed to have you. This is going to sound corny but i honestly do think that us meeting again may have been fate. I don’t like to think about what happened between us 6 months ago but i don’t want to ignore it because it happened and nothing can change that. But the point is, is that my love grew for you. And it continues to grow. Every single day when i talk to you i feel so complete and i feel like i really found the one. My love grows for you more and more every time that we talk.

Attached is our rough draft. I want to thank you for the extension you gave us, but I suggested that our group turn it in today, so we can spend tomorrow working with Becky on our presentation.

Today when you get up in the morning you find that your body has been replaced with A GLITTERING IRIDESCENT MECHA SUIT ENCRUSTED WITH EVERY NICE MESSAGE YOU'VE EVER BEEN SENT.

Hello Sorors, my name is Tiarh Waters 7ZΔSP16. I want to thank each and everyone one of you for all the support you have provided, for giving me the strength to persist, and succeed. I am so happy and honored to be a proud member of Delta Sigma Theta Sorority, Incorporated and I owe it all to you who saw something special in me. Please continue to watch over us and thank you once again.

Four score and seven years ago our fathers brought forth, upon this continent, a new nation… oops, wrong speech. *pulls out large stack of papers* Ahh… here it is.*clear throat* Hello, I am Naomi Lee, friend and Sister to the lovely bride who about half of us came here to see. I love her, enough to forgive her for no longer sharing a last name with me. But, that is besides the point, because me and the new Mrs.Granger have a lot of stories, which I had to pick through. Some would say it is easy, but if you had her as a sister, well, you know to leave out the embarrassing ones.

So, I’ve been dating this guy named Bruce Spencer, from OkCupid for the past month.

She loved blue M&M’s because they reminded her of the heard of hydrangeas in her grandma’s front yard

Thanks for the visit this morning ladies. Anita, I just wanted to ensure you know exactly what I am taking on here so there is no confusion. Barb, Val & I spoke this morning as well.

Firstly, I would like acknowledge the Traditional Owners of the land on which we stand here today, the Wurundjeri people, and pay my respects to their elders, past and present.

Good afternoon ladies and gentlemen, family and friends. Welcome everyone, and please make yourself comfortable. But I need everyone ensure they keep your shoes on, I don’t want you to clear the room yet.