Essay on Humorous Wedding Speech from the Father of the Bride

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Humorous Wedding Speech from the Father of the Bride

Well, good afternoon everyone, for those of you that don?t know me my name is Lee and I?m Janie?s dad, and in keeping with tradition, it is my honor and privilege to deliver the ?Father of the Bride Speech?. Having to make this speech is one of the few opportunities in a married man?s life when he is allowed to do all of the talking...and I intend to make the most of it.

Now, giving a speech can be a little stressful so I will put into practice what I preach, that is...always remember the ABC to the XYZ of public speaking. ABC..Always Be Confident, ?XYZ..Xamine Your Zipper. (check zipper).

It won?t be a long speech on account of my throat?.no, it?s not sore, it?s just that
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Let me raise my glass to you Janet in a private toast, (drinks) (aside)?. Anything for a drink!

The last wedding speech I made was at our wedding 39 years ago. 39 years...Considering the penalty for murder that?s more than two life sentences.

My speech on that day started badly, sagged in the middle with long silences and finished in incomprehensible ramblings. I hope this one is a little better.

In those day things were very different. We were not so forward and were very innocent...On our wedding day we sat up all night waiting for our sexual relations to arrive! How times have changed?when I first met Janet, Las Vegas hadn?t even been discovered.

I remember meeting Janet for the first time. I knew then and there that she was Miss Right?It was some time later I discovered that her first name was ?always??.

At our wedding reception two of the guests were the vicar and an elderly old uncle who were chatting in a corner. I offered them a drink and the vicar asked for a large whisky. The old uncle said ?No thanks; I?d rather go with a scarlet woman than touch the demon drink. The vicar promptly gave me back his drink and said ?I didn?t know there was a choice?. Now I don?t want to offend anybody so if there is a vicar present I apologise...and if there is a scarlet woman here, I?ll meet you in the bar in ten minutes.

Seriously though it is traditional for the Brides father to
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