I Think I Love My Wife

With the world being populated by so many people and families, there are several types of people with diverse ethnic backgrounds, culture, and manner of living that are the causes of distinct values within a family. Families that are rich and poor have virtuous family values, however what one may consider as a mediocre family value may seem poor to someone else and vice versa. The purpose of this essay is to address the societal issues amongst our family values and the working class.

During life, birth, and death, a family is one of the few natures of life that are present throughout. Often times, the value of family is taken for granted, and people tend to disregard the importance it carries. Due to the power present in the nature of a man, often times it is challenging for women to establish a firm independence, in distinction of the common norms inaugurated in society and in family. In both A Thousand Splendid Suns and Pride and Prejudice, men are the dominant figures in all households, as they have control over their financial status, who their children marry, where they live, and create means in which the females of the family must follow. The inferiority that women face leads to an inquiry of an immense pride

Family. What do you picture? Two married parents, their son and daughter, and maybe a dog, all living in a two story house in a nice suburban neighborhood. And who should blame you for picturing that? It’s been drilled into our minds all throughout our childhoods. Through our families, the tv, the books we read. But is this really all true? 50 percent of all marriages end in divorce and of that 50 percent, 46 percent are families. So why is this “perfect” family ideal so widespread? Author Barbara Kingsolver tries to explain this in her essay: ‘Stone Soup’. She claims it’s because society is so traditional and primitive in the way we idealize what a family is supposed to be: two married parents and their children. But that’s not really the case anymore. The main idea of her essay is that the definition of family needs to be reimagined to define more of what a family means, rather than what its terminology implies.

Talcott Parsons’ (1956, pg. 309) believed that “the nuclear family is a social system” which consists of a straight married couple and around two to five children, “can be distinguished, and does function as a significant group” (1956, pg.308). Parsons believed that the family benefitted society in ways such as the teachings of gender roles and the overall structure of society: the male going to work and being the breadwinner, while the wife stays at home and cooks and nurtures the children. After the Second World War, the nuclear family was the most common type of family making the structure easily “distinguishable”. However, when we look at the postmodern society, we can see that there are many different types of families nowadays such

‘The family performs important tasks that contribute to society’s basic needs and helps perpetuate social order.’ (Anthony Giddens 2006 - Page 238) Functionalists believe a family’s paramount purpose is to raise and support their children within society.

Contextually, the family provides socialisation for children, so they can eventually be prepared for the trials and tribulations of the ‘outside world’. And because children have a lack of power within the family unit, it prepares them to be obedient when consulting with bosses, or those of a higher position, as adults. The family also provide a secure emotional base, so that workers can refresh then rejoin co-workers to make profits for their

Throughout time, family has been proven to be one of the largest influences on a person’s life. A person’s relationship with their family members completely shapes who they are as a person and creates who that person is going to be in life. The theme of familial life shaping how a person turns out is exemplified throughout three different short stories: “Flavio’s Home” by Gordon Parks, “Being an Other” by Melissa Algranati, and “The Married Woman” by Simone de Beauvoir. These three stories exemplify that being a part of family comes with many responsibilities, whether they are cultural responsibilities or responsibilities that help to keep the family running.

Parsons list of functions is much shorter than Murdock’s; he argues that the family has to provide for the primary socialization of children by teaching them the acceptable rules and patterns of behaviour to ensure the stabilisation of society. Parsons analysis suggests that as society progresses the family naturally adapts and therefore shows how the family’s functions adapt to a modern society with less emphasis on the need for the family to fulfil the economic maintenance with outside agencies taking on some of the roles of the family.

As Lyndon Baines Johnson says, “The family is the corner stone of our society. More than any other force it shapes the attitude, the hopes, the ambitions, and the values of the child. And when the family collapses it is the children that are usually damaged. When it happens on a massive scale the community itself is crippled. So, unless we work to strengthen the family, to create conditions under which most parents will stay together, all the rest — schools, playgrounds, and public assistance, and private concern — will never be enough” (Danes). He believed that family is the base of the society. The way that family is set up affects children in all ways. Family structure is very important and that no matter what we do,

Murdock (1949) studied 250 different societies, he concluded that society could not survive without the family as it was so functional. He argued there were four essential functions, without these society would not survive: sexual, reproductive, economic and education. Without sex and reproduction there would be no new members, without economic and education, the family providing for its members, the young socialised to norms and values, cultures would not exist. In the absence of this human society would cease (Haralambos and Holborn, 2008). 83

Ezequiel Pagan  Patrick Williams  English 111  16 October 2014   Family Value and Truth  Family in society is a social structure. Family plays a key role in human life because it can give  people a sense of home, or a loving and supportive group. In most cases when people think of families  they think of having a mom, dad, brother, sister.  However, nothing in life is perfect. Today, we have  separated , same sex, extended, and blended families. Society tries to explain these more contemporary  families but has a harsh way of doing so. In the essay, Stone Soup, by Barbara Kingsolver, she  discusses how society views families and in the essay, Family Values, by Richard Rodriguez, he talks  about American family values. Both

When I was growing up, I remember my family situation as extremely chaotic. I was one of eight children and my father and mother had little time to devote to me individually. Most of the time they spent trying to earn enough to support us with their meager resources. I was often called upon to act as a surrogate mother to my siblings. I felt I had little time to develop my own unique perspective and voice when I was very young. Even as a preschooler I remember doing chores to help out at home. However, this situation did foster some positive aspects of my character. I learned to be mature at an early age and gained a sense of competence because of my responsibilities. But I also was taught put the needs of others second to my own. I feel that I did not learn to value my own, legitimate desires to an adequate degree as a young girl and have only recently acquired a true sense of worth [THESIS].

Many people have grown up to be successful individuals with happy, elegant lives. Others grow to not have the luxuries but they still consider themselves successful because they are morally straight. Everyone’s definition of success is different, but through the various definitions of success, all successful people became that way because of their families. The reasons why family is directly related with success in later life is: family can push you to do things you would not do on your own. Family will always be there for you, and family prepares you to care for others.

It seems to be without question that love is at the core of what every human desires. We seek it from the start of life, before we even know the word or emotion, in the bond of parent and child. We look for it in friendships and family relationships as we grow throughout childhood. When mature, we long for the companionship that a lifelong vow of love and marriage will satisfy. The Bible mentions love hundreds of times and places it high above almost anything else, naming it as the center of our salvation in Christ and our hope of life eternal with Him. It’s almost too simple of a concept that love matters, but as Sue Gerhardt shares throughout her book Why Love Matters: How Affection Shapes a Baby’s Brain, somehow we lose sight of just how important love really is, and the fallout from this neglect can change a person’s life completely.

Before this class I never put thought about my family goals because I believed it was not important at this point in my life. However, during the class after discussions and reading Meg Jay’s book especially, I started to understand the importance of work-life balance. Meg Jay’s advice and the story she shared about Emma really resonated with me. Meg Jay stated that, “the foregrounding of the individual in relationships has caused us to forget about one of our