I Was An Idiot For Saying No

I’ve never been the one that has liked people trailing their fingers through my tangled mess of hair, but seeing how Serra admired my long locks when her hair was invisible made me realize that these are the moments that are going to count on the day that no one wants to visit. If someone was listening to our conversations that night, they would have never thought that this girl was going through something so terrible. Out of all the topics we came across that night, one in particular still stays with me. Serra met a boy. A boy with a beautiful soul and deep brown eyes; however, he was also a boy fighting cancer. His name was Austin, and thankfully, he was going through his last round of Chemo. Serra thought the world of Austin. She told me how they would talk through all hours of the night, and how he escorted her for homecoming. When I told her to pursue the relationship, she quickly informed me that dying and having a boyfriend would be like oil and water. Not able to mix. I understood her point of view, but seeing the sparkle in her eyes and the way she always smiled when she talked about him made me realize even more that the cards of her life were not exactly played in her favor. Even while her body was slowly deteriorating, she was still looking out for others feelings and not her

She was upset with me. She didn’t have to be but she didn’t know that. We argued all the way to Youth Group and when we got there, we ignored each other. I wasn’t mad, in fact I was joyful and eager. It was clear, however, that she wasn’t very happy. I felt bad but at the same time I didn’t. Finally, it came. Nick, our leader, called us in for his lesson. I tried hard to fight back a grin as I watched Carmyn strut angrily towards the doors of the church. I went in and stood beside her. She didn’t say a word or even look at me. It was hard not to smile but I pushed through. The lights dimmed down. The first song started. We stood in silence while the people around us began singing and praising. After that the second song came on. But this time, the church sat silently because it wasn’t a song for praise. It was our song.

Later on, I was in tears. I still wanted to see some of my best friends every day. I didn’t want to leave them. I ran up to my bright, cozy room, and called on of my best friend in tears. We talked for a while, until we were

The door slammed shut and we were both on the verge of tears; as I held her tightly in my arms we discussed everything that had just unfolded. What would become of our relationship? Emma's parents despised me as if their daughter was in love with Satan himself. We were both from completely different ends of society, but our love was inseparable, or so it seemed. Emma explained that even though she loved me we were just too different. After hours of conversation, we agreed to meet at a nearby restaurant the following day to discuss the future of our love. As I continue to reminisce, I lie wide awake, in a paralysed state, worrying about what tomorrow may bring. I know deep down in my heart that once that shining star dies so will I. Without her, I have no reason to live, no reason to continue fighting the cruel battle of life. Thus, if I lose my one and only angel there will be no hope, no light just a deep dark meaningless void filled with despair and suffering. However, despite the heartbreak and lack of light, I continue to cling to that last bit of thread, that last bit of hope, that last bit of

And then she turned to me. I felt special that she had saved me for last. I smiled at her, and she did the same to me. We had grown inseparable over the past few years especially, but now it was time to say goodbye. I knew at that point that nothing at all would change, that we would still be sisters, still be best friends, still be inseparable. Who cares if we’re 5 ½ hours away? This was us.

Eventually, he had introduced you to a new world and with it, new life-long friends. He was a bit sad to part with you, but he said that exploration would help you grow. So you said your farewells and promised to stay in touch. You always made sure to uphold that vow by visiting him every now and again.

When I walked into her room the vibe felt like a punch in the face, it was just awful. The vibe was like a thick fog, clouding up the room with pain and sickness, altering reality. With every step into the room I took the room got darker and greyer. When I saw her, I knew that death was coming for her. She had gone from the beautiful green-eyed blonde I knew to a

As the school years flew by, Tyler and I remained strong friends, in addition to the other strong friendships we had built within our friend group. At this point in time, it is surprising if we don’t talk every day, as we have several classes

When I look at her I see myself moving away from all that I know and love like a blue whale swept from its cool ocean home to the hot sandy shore by an unexpected foamy wave. I see myself wearing black to school in an effort to participate in a funeral I cannot attend for someone who I loved who someone unexpectedly ripped from this earth like the girl sitting next to me rips her algebra homework from her bright pink spiral notebook. I see myself silently screaming to the starry sky begging for answers and wondering why no reply reaches my ears like a violent flash of lightning without the steady booming thunder to follow. I have suffered losses, my relationship with the Lord has stammered, and I have sinned. Though like the girl the silver remains slightly tarnished from these experiences, my chalice underneath still shines through. I would drain every last ounce of my thick scarlet blood to protect my family, and I regularly wrap my time and attention into a pretty little box with a bow on top as a gift to present to those who need them more than I do. Because of these actions and experiences, I am the girl in

Her hair was a dark auburn with streaks of blond and her eyes were the deepest ocean blue. I traced her freckles with my eyes, like a constellation of stars. My heart skipped a beat when she sat next to me. I was questioning why I was breathless from a girl, a girl... Why a girl? I was happy she decided to sit by me, but then I realized it was the only empty seat in the class. She was mysterious and I could smell her coconut perfume from a few feet away. Her fingernails had been chewed off and I wondered why. Was it a nervous habit? Was she upset about something? Maybe she just didn't like long nails. I couldn't think well enough to draw, unless I could've drawn her. Would my pencil do her beauty justice? We didn't talk and she didn't even offer me a

I had done things to get her attention and she hadn’t put any interest in me. What could I do? I thought, and thought and thought. I asked my mom for ideas and she wasn’t any help, she seemed a little upset that I was having feelings for a girl. What did she want me to do, be sad forever? I wasn’t expecting to fall for the girl next door, that’s so cliché but I didn’t care, Ana was the one. I addressed the fact that maybe I just didn’t have a chance, but I knew if my dad was still around, he wouldn’t let me give up, he’d tell me that i’m capable of anything, including the majestic Ana. I thought about it and I knew what I had to do, I needed to be forward. It was April, just about five months flew by during my quest for Ana’s heart. I had gotten her flowers, made her a picnic, indulged myself with her presence by taking her to dinner twice, the dinners never meant anything other than the fact that we were just friends. I still hadn’t broken through. This was going to be my last try, I told myself I couldn’t keep this up, I couldn’t spend my time on someone without any effort back. This was going to be my last and most memorable attempt for

I remember the day just like it was yesterday, the pale color and coldness of her skin. The sky was clear blue, soft, with a touch of red, and the trees seemed stiff in their bright green shade. The wind was blowing with its humid dry air. And All I could do was stand silently in disbelief, caught up in my own thoughts and calm as I ever been. Wondering what I could have done differently to change the course of time, life had taken us upon. Since that very day a chunk of my heart was ripped away, and broken into pieces… “Oh how I miss her so much.”

I wish that she never leave this world, but her time just finished, and I'm happy because I know that she enjoyed her life, I will miss her big smile, always in her face those big eyes that tell everything about her, her eyes were amazing and big, when she was angry, she will just look at you like if she will kill you. She used to bother a lot, but that make her so amazing. I wish I could back in time and save her from everything, but we can't stop time , and she left this world, but I'm sure that now she is on another paradise and I'm sure that she is laughing really

She was very nice, sweet and friendly. I invited her to my house, we hung out to other places outside of school and she was VERY shy there too. 1 year passed, we chatted through Facebook and we made videocalls through Skype and watched movies together. It was great, because she was a good listener and I started telling her my inner secrets. She was also a great advisor and a great friend; she never betrayed me or failed in being a good friend. Now, we're in Senior year, and we're the bestest friends ever. And I REALLY am grateful of having her in my life - she literally made me a better person and made me feel hopeful again... This is just a shoutout to everyone who reads this; people can be more awesome than you think, and they can even change your

I had a great time with you during this last year and half. I will always remember the very first time we met in the engineering lab, the very first time my lips touched your lips when you asked me if you can kiss me and we kissed, the very first time you hugged me, the first time when we made love. Your smile your way of looking at me will always be fresh in my memories. Spending time with you and doing things together was the best part about this relationship.