Internal Conflict, When Emotions Compromise Your Negotiation Leverage

Whether we like it or not, conflict is a part of everyday lives. It can happen to anyone, from your friends to your family.

Our emotions affect us in so many ways. Emotions affect the way we behave, our views and opinions, our relationships and our decision-making; therefore, they are very relevant to our day-to-day lives. It is important that people have an understanding of these emotions and that they are able to interpret them. Emotions can both help and hinder our ability to best live our lives. It is also important to realize that even our emotions are shaped and biased by our environment and those close to us.

Negotiation is a fundamental form of dispute resolution involving two or more parties (Michelle, M.2003). Negotiations can also take place in order to avoid any future disputes. It can be either an interpersonal or inter-group process. Negotiations can occur at international or corporate level and also at a personal level. Negotiations often involve give and take acknowledging that there is interdependence between the disputants to some extent to achieve the goal. This means that negotiations only arise when the goals cannot be achieved independently (Lewicki and Saunders et al., 1997). Interdependence means the both parties can influence the outcome for the other party and vice versa. The negotiations can be win-lose or win-win in nature.

Conflict is inevitable in any personal relationship or among members of any group. While we encounter many types of conflict in our lifetime, we often look for ways to avoid conflict. So, why do we run away from dealing with our conflict? It is often because many of us fear the conflict will escalate into a situation we will not be able to sustain. “As conflicts escalate, they go through certain incremental transformations. Although these transformations occur separately on each side, they affect the conflict as a whole because they are usually mirrored by the other side. As a result of these transformations, the conflict is intensified in ways that are sometimes exceedingly difficult to undo” (Pruitt, and Kim 89). We

Jennifer S. Lerner, author of Emotion and Decision Making, talks about how our emotions can actively affect our actions. In Lerner’s book, it states, “We start with emotions arising from the judgement or a choice at hand, a type of emotion that strongly and routinely shapes decision making.” Our emotions cause us to make certain decisions in our everyday lives. For example a person who is feeling nervous and anxious about a specific outcome of a risky situation may choose a more safe route. A person who admires an organization may donate money. In both cases, our the way we feel about something or someone determines how we address a situation and how we treat someone or something. In some way our emotions act as our conscience in each situation we go through that requires us to choose an outcome .

“Successful negotiation is not about getting to ‘yes’; it’s about mastering ‘no’ and understanding the path to an agreement is” (Christopher Voss). During the negotiation process, there are a lot of moving parts and personalities. In addition, hurt feelings can all too often get in the way. The bottom line of any negotiation is to reach a settlement that will mutually benefit both parties. It’s a challenging situation by which compromise or agreement is reached while attempting to avoid arguments and disputes.

In conclusion, Hackley points out that "When effectively channeled, strong emotions can make you a passionate advocate for your cause. But when your feelings get the better of you during a negotiation, they become distracting and potentially destructive." Hackley. "Leveraging Emotion in Negotiation (2006)

When two people take opposite sides on any particular issue in a dispute, they both often refuse to budge from their divergent viewpoints. Most likely outcome is a stalemate. If a solution is found then both will win. Negotiation interests largely relate to basic human needs. They are powerful influences in our decision making processes. Interests not only include those tangible desires which correspond to the specific problem at hand such as increasing sales or productivity. They also link to our more basic human emotions that are less obvious to the participants (Negotiations).

Negotiation is one of the most common approaches used to make decisions and manage disputes. It is also the major building block for many other alternative dispute resolution procedures. According to Christopher W (2012), negotiation is the principal way that people redefine an old relationship that is not working to their satisfaction or establish a new relationship where none existed before. Because negotiation is such a common problem-solving process, it is in everyone 's interest to become familiar with negotiating dynamics and skills. This section is designed to identify what worked well and not well in the negotiation. In addition, to present strategies that generally makes the negotiation more efficient and improvement in the next

Whether it is at work, church or in our private relationships, negotiations are a necessary tool for reaching an agreement. They are made by discussing each parties point of view with the aim being to reach an agreement that is mutually beneficial. For the most part, negotiation is the process by which those people involved successfully adopt or abandon their respective position through the use of positional bargaining. There are different types of approaches for the negotiation process - some hard and others soft in their manner of approach. The desired outcome of

Learn what makes you emotional and get it out of the system before the negotiation – Understand what is the emotion you are likely to feel. Perhaps you are afraid of failure, you are nervous about talking or you feel you get overexcited if things go well. Get the emotion out of the way beforehand by doing a rigorous exercise or calming the nerves with meditation.

We negotiate every day for different purposes, and each day we experience emotions, both positive and negative. When negotiating, formally or informally, with family or in the organizational workplace we often do not know how to handle ourselves, yet alone the emotions of the other person or group.

Communication styles in negotiation are probably one of the most important skills or characteristics one will develop over a lifetime. From the point a human being begins to develop cognitive skills, the process of learning and understanding situations become more apparent. One will learn from a very young age the dynamics and characteristics of communication and its role in negotiation. To better understand the communication process, one must be able to recognize how they communicate, whether it is on an assertive, aggressive, passive, or passive-aggressive level of communication. The manner in which one conveys his/her message is critical, and the many methods in which they do it is

Emotions No matter how hard you try, you cannot control your emotions, only attempt to hide them. Emotions influence every aspect of our lives, what we do, what we say, and et cetera. All of our emotions, from anger to insecurity, are influenced by several factors, just as our lives are influenced by our emotions (Gelinas, Emotions 35). First of all, it causes problems when one does not trust himself, and it shows up in many ways.

Negotiation is all about a strategy. The end result is usually to end a problem that someone is having, whether it is personally or