King Procrast’s Big Mistake
The ruler of Procrastia, King Procrast XIV, lived the prodigal palace life, throwing lavish parties regularly for thousands of handpicked guests. Donning a huge gold crown studded with sparkling jewels which rest precariously upon his shiny, bald head resembling a thimble on a potato, the king outweighed most by hundreds of pounds. During every feast, Procrast would eat enough food to satisfy an entire household. In fact, he recently hired a team of six royal “standers” to assist the obese king in standing. The year’s bountiful reaping (no credit goes to the dilatory King) and conditions gave Procrast a good reason to celebrate. However, unbeknownst to the king, the plentiful profits attracted the envy of the ruthless northern kingdoms.
An icy breeze swirled into the great Hall of the king’s palace abruptly interrupting the colossal, lavish feast. A tall, thin, disheveled man with a filthy, tattered, coal-black cloak stepped into the hall. He looked as if he spent several days dragged through a landfill..
“Your Majesty, I have come to deliver an urgent message from Lord-”
The King, fearing the contents of the message, suddenly interrupted him.
“Well well, look what we have here! I don’t remember inviting you…but that’s alright you can take a seat there,” he gestured to a vacant seat, “You look as if you need a few meals under your belt. Come, come! Join us. Oh, and by the way, close the door, I’m getting a bit chilly!” he bellowed jovially