Lazy Bum Monologue

The scene starts off by Spongebob and Patrick screaming as they are being pulled out of the fish tank they are being held captive in. The scuba-diver, Spongebob and Patrick in hand, marches over to a table lit with a lamb, each step thumbing across the wooden floor. Spongebob and Patrick, the lamps intense heat bearing down on them, begin to sweat and dry up. The scuba-diver laughs menacingly. He then proceeds to take a book and close the door to the bathroom. As they lay in the gift shop, shriveling up from the heat of lamp, Spongebob and Patrick realise that they have made it to Shell City. Overcome with joy, they began to sniffle and a single tear forms in an eye from both. Spongebob and Patrick sing as loud as they can, “I’m a goofy goober,

There's always that time when your Best Friend forces you to do something or in my case, my only friend forced me to come to this dumb party. If I didn't want to spend eight hours with those idiots, what makes you think I'll like to go to one of their parties, and spend even more time with them. The smell of liquor will make me go nose blind in a matter of minutes, just like in those febreeze commercials. The blaring music wouldn't go unnoticed not even by a death person. There were a million of things wrong with going to this party for example, getting drunk, which leads to being vulnerable, a stranger could just grab you and Fuck, next thing you know your pregnant, your parents will go crazy! That baby being born will stop you from focusing

This is going to be a long day for me if my boss finds out i’m late.

Woah, woah, woah. We got a bitch ass sprog here thinking dissing someone's comment is really going to get us somewhere. You're just a little thirteen-year-old furfag, grow the fuck up already. Anyways, I was just stating the fact that just because other people are allergic to something shouldn't be the reason why something should be illegal same for folks who have asthma. Also the thing on destroying your lungs/cancer there way more other things that cause cancer, but you don't see the government trying to stop it, know do you? All the shit they put in our food cause cancer, but you don't see tons of commercials talking about how we should grow our own food or to eat better. I mean people should have the right to smoke a cigarette if they want

So Mister T, another night of insomnia not unusual except it was you that I was thinking about , which to some degree was a welcome deflection from my usual reasons for not getting to sleep. One of my coping strategies has been to get up and write in the dark if I’ve been awake for more than 90 mins. It's 4.00am the witching hour between deep sleep and depressive wakefulness. The foxes are squealing (argh) the rain is lightly drumming my skylights (so lovely), it's one of the other reasons I bought this house and slept in the bedroom up 4 flights of stairs in my old house when I was on crutches! I so love listening to rain on the glass but still can explain why it makes me horny! Sorry, my brain is more monkey-like than normal.

I am danny, I eat eggs, if I poo poo in my bed, I fam fam I like poo poo will get head. If my fam fam don’t love me, there not fam fam, they lee lee. Ifg I said knock knock would you stick a stick up my stick, lol joking im am being lolluy, if you say so I will eat poo poo, but I feel like poo poo no taste gtood, poo pooo like poo poo in a poo poos donkey lonker tickle me please im elmos I like moshi monsters cause im elmo poo poo sausage had can I get sausage please I need it dude like omg please give sausage please poo poo in bumhoel like liter hosen in poo pooo lo lo

I was playing xbox one day and this little white boy started yelling at me. I asked if the little boy was racist and he said no and started to yell at me because i asked him if he was racist. He said just because hes white doesn't mean he is racist . He said i should get to know the person before assuming they are racist.

Waiting in Vain There’s no reason to be scared, so you said All pains and emotions will soon be dead. You will forget me and the things we had Oh, tell me why I’m missing you so bad?

It often times whispers loudly in my head. To act tough and to be aggressive when it’s “necessary.” To drown my emotions in myself, Only to become a young man hiding behind a mask. While glaring down at the world like a titan to an ant, Facing my feeble foes with my superficial strength,

I am very similar to the character Park, from Rainbow Rowell's Eleanor and Park, because of his love for music, his quiet nature, and a similar experience of becoming friends with a new kid. Thought the book Park uses music as an escape. During the bus ride to school, he listens to music for, "drowning out morons at the back of the bus" (Rowell 8). Like Park, music also acts as an escape for me. Whenever I am having a rough day, or I want to relax, I listen to music. Park and I also have a similar taste in music. This quote is used to describe his love for music, "He had an endless supply and an insatiable appetite for punk music" (Rowell 529) I believe this quote can also be used to describe my love for music because I can never get enough of it.

So my friend was at my house, and we got bored. So we tried hacking into my friends (a boy) accounts on email. So instead, we decided to make a screen name where he wouldn't know. It was something like a hobo or sommething, like, imahobo or something, and so when he got on, we started talking to him. He got really freaked out and then we started haunting him with stuff we knew about him. He got really creeped out and for the next week he was never online again and he wasn't very talkitive. He told me how the "imahobo" man started talking to him and creeping him out, and we would try to hold back laughing. He still doesn't know that it was us. Now we are almost enemies; well, i find him as an enemy but he likes

A slacker slob promises to change his ways by opening a food truck to impress a girl and show his tidy roommate that he’s responsible.

Mom arrived at Gram's right on time no GPS for us, i know the way by heart and i help mommy with the directions on the way we made girl talk.i said to mommy that daddy was very handsome and that someday when i am old enough i would like to marry daddy. Mommy, always the lady, blurted out HA! I could see her in the rear view mirror and she was looking at me. Her eyes were wide as if to say, how do i get myself out of this one? Mommy very calmly explained that daddies can’t marry their little girls. I sat very quiet waiting for the next shoe to drop and it did. You see Roma you are Daddy’s little girl and he can’t marry you. And besides he’s already married....to me. She continued with someday when i you are a grown woman and you bring a boy

i have always been told war is no place for a woman, but it doesn't make sense to me because men have always left the dying ones to us. i think of this as i'm rushing to shove salt into the open wound of a groaning soldier, he is dirty and bloody just like all the rest of them. the salt keeps the wound from getting infected until a real doctor can operate and the morphine lessens the pain i look at the man who brought him in and yell

My parents definitely wouldn't be if they found out, which of course they won’t. They don’t give a damn about my life anymore, much less where I am until 1:30 in the morning when I get home. They think I’m just putting off steam with my friends, smoking or drinking or picking up chicks, it’s what they’re hoping. But I’m just not that kind of person. Don’t get me wrong, I am letting off steam, just in a different way than most people would expect of me.